Well, I called DART to find out our local AA hotline number -- guess there's not one here. But, they connected me to Women Sobriety. I spoke to a woman named Mary who has quit for 4 years. Made me feel a whole lot better. She suggested that I should go into rehab -- but rehab isn't for me.... atleast not now. Right now, I need to be here for my daughter and get myself better. I'm not ready to attend AA meetings in my hometown because it's so small... right now... I am able to be here and attend meetings online. I'll get in contact with an addiction counsellor though. And eventually, I will be able to attend meetings in my hometown when I am ready. I'm going to get the Big Book and start my 12 step program... in the other forum and keep in this forum to. Thank you all for your wonderful words of wisdom, encouragement and support.
I read your other post and this one and I wanted to say welcome!
It is a very emotional ride but the benefits are well worth it! I also have a daughter and every time I looked at her after one of my binges I felt exactly how you do. It is a powerful disease this alcoholism and nobody in the world could have forced me to quit.......even my daughter though I love her with all my heart. I had to make a decision for myself.
It sounds as if you have made that decision! Good for you! We are all here to help in any way we can. Please know that you are in my prayers.
I agree that face to face is very important in recovery. Even posting here and chatting with people live I am still isolating if I don't get to my meetings.
I remember being very afraid that I would see someone I knew at a meeting but then my husband said to me "Well, if they are there they have the same problem so what's to be embarassed about?" Hmmmmm...
I have seen people I know from work in meetings and it really is kind of comforting knowing that "normal" people have this disease....I am not alone, not special....just your garden variety drunk! And so are they..
Yeah, I started out in a small town also. I figured, the whole town had probably seen me making an a** out of myself already and it didn't bother me, so shouldnt bother me to have them know I was in a meeting. At least I would remember the meeting the next day, LOL.....
__________________
Funny, isn't it, how friends and a Power greater than ourselves can neutralize nightmares?
Wren, that's very funny. I can understand exactly where you are coming from. And thanks Jen for the great understanding and encouragement. Both of you are making me see light in different ways... I think maybe I'll be going to a meeting soon... but for now... I'm going to bed. And I'll be in chat tomorrow. Until then, have a "sober" good night -- tomorrow I'll be on day 6! Goodnight. Candace.
Way to go!!! Good for you!! Just take it one day at the time, or one minute, whatever you need to do. The most important part of sobriety is keeping in constant contact with other sober drunks. It's gets better, then worse, then better. Just hang in there, and no matter what DON'T DRINK!
As for going to meetings in a small town, just remember EVERYONE is there for the same reason as you.
