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Post Info TOPIC: To speak out or stay silent....


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To speak out or stay silent....

hello.  I am a recovering alcoholic, in the 12 step program off and on since 2009.  Recently I came across a disturbing posting from a fellow 12 stepper with years of sobriety.  He is well known in the community, and has been for quite some time.  Recently I read a really disturbing post of his on social media that talks about a dear friend of mine who tragically lost the battle to her addiction.  The post in question is below.  He is essentially writing about a woman's suicide attempt in graphic detail to get back at a different person who made a veiled post aimed at some members who took advantage of the woman in question in her last few months of her life. He responded to the post in question by writing what is below.  My question is this.  I want to approach this individual, and ask him to take down the offending post, or at least ask one of his friends to talk to him about some issues he has.  The girl who tragically passed away a short time later, and attempted suicide was vulnerable, 20 years younger than him, and was incredibly vulnerable.  I just question what a man with this much sobriety, and knows the 12 steps by heart would be doing, allowing the girl to stay at his place, and taking her to Banff (a resort town), when everyone clearly knew she needed serious intervention.  I just want the opinion of the members of the forum about this situation.  It has been bothering me, and I don't really know how to react to this.






Name Withheld* is feeling i will never raise my hand to a woman but i sure would pay someone to....Keep your lying f**king head up cause when you least expect it,EXPECT IT !!!

Ready for my next bit of drama going on in my life?
Here it is....
So apparently Im being painted with a very very uncalled for and absurd brush,
I wasnt going to say anything but Im shaking with anger and need to do because Im livid and thats not good for anyone except my lawyer!
For the record Im crushed over the loss of a person I tried to help out,
No hidden agenda nor malice...
I cannot believe that I have to do this because of some vindictive cow who has to always make any and everything about her is out there expelling lies or at least innuendo;
Perhaps thats why your pathetic ass was about to be tossed off our ball team?
This is EXACTLY What Happened as written by me,
You know the person that was actually there !?
After a Splendid day in Banff(Sunday)
We returned to my house to nest up and get ready for the week ahead,
A little bit into the night and a lot of phone calls to whomever ,
I was asked if it would be okay if she went out for a beer with one of her friends 
(Turns out it one of her ex bfs friends that had been pursuing her for awhile)
Told her shes a adult and thats her business.
It got later and later into the night so I locked the door and went to bed cause I worked Monday,
Morning dawns and I get up to shower and get my week started so I walk every so quite not to wake my house guest whom had been sleeping on my sofa for the last week and half I see that she didnt make it home yet,
But I was wrong and as I approached the bathroom all I see is a closed door and some serious banging behind the door,
Needless to say Im pissed and tell her just that 
Cmon I need the shower and you can have the bathroom all day !!!
I have no option but to wait,
I go lay down in my bed while I do just that.
Sure enough I fell back asleep for 45 mins so now Im freaking out about being late and go back to the bathroom where the noise is no more but the door is still locked,
I bang on the door to no answer and you know when you get that feeling that something it completely off?
Yeah that took me over so I forced the door open only to see a sight Ill never forget of my house guests lifeless body laying fetal around the toilet and Im terrified that there is now a corpse in my house,
I grabbed her to see if shes was breathing and she was so I shook the hell out of her to try to revive her but nothing,
Ive never been so scared in my life(And Ive had guns pointed at me)
But Im fucking terrified now and dont know what to do?!
(This is the ONLY time I touched her;besides holding her hand but we will get to that later)
I dragged her body down the hallway and lifted her onto my made bed,
Not knowing what to do I called a friend and told her what was happening because I know shes from this scene and I have never seen this before and Im now losing my shit !!!
She proceeded to tell me what to do to try to revive her but nothing so Im a idiot and then was asked if I had called 911 yet I hadnt so I did(It then dawned on me that this was the first time in my life that I had ever done this, I know it had been called for me plenty of times before but this was my Cherry Popping)
After what seemed like days my house was over ran with 11 people all crammed into my room 4 EMTS,5 Firefighters & 2 Police.
They did whatever they needed to do to try to keep her alive and I was taken into the living room and questioned by the police,
This Ill always remember this because the one cop asked me if we lived together and I said no it was only my place,
Then he asked me if we were seeing each other which was a resounding no,
Then asked me how I knew her and I told him that she was in the process of leaving her abusive bf,
Then he asked me where she slept and I pointed at the sofa and said Thats her room there
This is where it got surreal and the cop that hadnt said a word yet asked me about Tegan & Sara ?!
Only because his wife went to school with them and he had a couple of tracks on his workout playlist,
He was admiring all the T&S propaganda I have thru out my place and asked if I was a huge fan?
I then pulled down my pants and showed him my tattoo and and said 
What do YOU think ?!?!
At this time they were removing her from my place and I was asking where they were taking her and told to the Rocky View but it would be at least 45 mins till she was stable and placed.
After about a hour I I tried to calm down and drive over there,
This is when I saw this little baby bird full of tubes and only a breathing thing is only ever seen on tv or movies but here I am now sobbing afraid I took too long to call 911 and shes not brain dead because of my lack of action,
I knew no one from her other life not family or friends but I was handed her phone and called the girl she said was her Bestie and she asked where we were and I cant remember if I went and got her or she cabbed but it was her and I bedside in the ICU unit for 3 days while she was in a coma,
It was at this time I was told that there was some tests run on her which I thought nothing of because were in a hospital and Id think that would be par for the course right?
There was a rape kit done to which I thought nothing of because I KNOW I never laid a hand on her besides the occasional Hug,
The shaking of her to try to wake her
The holding of her hand over 3 of the worst days of my life...
Im glad to say that she did make it out alive but was promptly swept away by her ex and I was ghosted from here on,
I have absolutely nothing to hide because I did nothing wrong so continue to believe what you want and spread vicious gossip,
Even better if you are so invested in this please please please get them to compare my DNA with her rape kit so I can prove my innocence !!!
If you need a saliva sample dont worry Im going to spit in your fucking face next time we cross paths...
I dont doubt that something happened to her that night but as GOD is my witness I know I did absolutely nothing wrong!
Oh yeah this Incident is the cause of my PTSD so think of the victims that have to live with this for the rest of their lives as you move on to your next episode of turning everything into something about you !!!
(*Editors Note: I don't like Bunnies,I LOVE RABBITS! )








-- Edited by AlbertaCowboy on Thursday 1st of March 2018 07:44:34 PM


MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 12357

Wow, I don't quite know how to respond to this ... except to say that I am NOT a big fan of social media ... ... ... (its just a platform to promote gossip)

There seems to be a lot more to this story than I wish to know about ... and that the principles and guidelines of the AA way of life were 'lacking' here ... I'm not going to sit in judgement of the guy trying to help a friend, but if it were a woman helping out, it wouldn't have been such an 'issue' ...

God Bless,


'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'

MIP Old Timer

Status: Offline
Posts: 1572

Welcome, AC. The only thing I can suggest is:



First, deal with the things that might kill you.


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