Seriously? Are you goofing with us, Goofyman?
I gave up over two years of sobriety. I too thought the promises had not come true for me. People were plotting against me and intentionally doing and saying things to me which I was sure they were out to get me. My financial situation had not really improved much at all since being sober. The only things which did change for me was that I didn't get any more DUI's, arrests, hospital stays, physical fights with my bf. Oh, I didn't have hangovers. I got rid of lifelong resentments. Got some more of those, though. Chose to cling to them so I wouldn't forgive and forget the people who did stuff to me. I too got tired of meetings, hearing the same ole stuff, especially from some of the people who crossed me. Nasty rumor about me got started by an AA'er I tried to befriend and help, so lost the good reputation and respect it took me over two years to get while sober. My self-confidence was shot to hell. Those two plus years of sobriety started to seem less appealing than going out and getting drunk again. So..............this is a first hand account of someone who, like you, didn't have as much motivation to stay sober as to get drunk.....

....and I am listing these not in order of importance, just as I think of them......:

I lost days of productivity due to drinking, hangovers and being physically exhausted and plain ole sick due to drinking even on days I didn't drink. I work for myself. My income was minimal. On days I was able to churn out some work time, I made mistakes.....and a lot of them...which resulted in losing money which I thought I made due to me having to refund payments made to me for careless errors on my part.

I spent hundreds of dollars on alcohol. Not only was I not making as much money due to "vacation" days I was taking to drink/recuperate I was spending money which really needed to go to things which became not as important to me--like food, rent, other bills.

I was sicker than a dog. The first bottle I got when I relapsed tasted like crap to me. It didn't affect me--not the relaxed, "everything is going to be alright" type of feelings I got sometimes when I was drinking. My body had been used to no alcohol. Now it had to adjust to alcohol and it did not like it although my mind was trying to convince me that I needed to keep drinking to feel those "special" affects I had remembered. I thought I was done....sick for days.....nope, the compulsion had kicked in and despite the fact that I got so sick my mind told me I just needed to get used to it again. So I went through a period of drinking and stopping, and I stayed sober for over 3 months at one time only to pick up again when my poor little feelings got hurt again.

The anxiety and paranoia returned. I got more jealous, more suspicious, more this and more that--and none of it was any good and only served to drag me further and further down. I isolated and fear of people returned and being in public like simple things going to stores, post office, etc. I started looking at all others had and I didn't more (actually, I started doing this not long before I relapsed).

It is harder to get sober and stay sober for me than it was to stay sober before. I told myself I wasn't a real alcoholic.....since I could get some sober days, I was controlling my drinking. The last time I drank I got those large bottles of wine....and I drank one of those in a day and then another the next day. I posted on here that the last day I drank I was crossing the street--a very busy road-- with my bottle of wine. A car which was turning didn't slow down and I almost got hit. I thought maybe that was a sign that I needed to quit again. I quickly dismissed that thought because in my mind the reason I "needed" to drink that bottle was to recover from almost getting hit. The reason I stopped (again) wasn't because of it either. (Slow learner) It was because I was physically and mentally extremely ill for a week after that. Sicker than I can remember being even from the first bottle I had when I first relapsed. More lost work. Also something I am not sure if I posted about....my legs....I noticed back in 2013 that my legs were starting to get numb and tingly more and more. There were at least two times when I was hardly able to walk and had to stay in bed during this time. I needed help just to get to the bathroom. I shuffled more than Tim Conway doing his Mr. Wiggin's impersonation on the Carol Burnett show. Actually, when I got to where I could shuffle I was doing pretty good. I looked this up and found that it is a sign of nerve damage and alcoholism can cause it. It can eventually reach the point where you lose the ability to walk at all. Well, my legs started doing this again the last couple of times I drank. So I know that if I kept drinking I would probably be crossing the street in a wheel chair to get my wine.

I have three weeks of sobriety time as of today. I sat in the meeting where my guyfriend picked up his 3 year chip last month. We had gotten sober together. When I relapsed, it is a miracle that he didn't drink the whole time I was going in and out. He didn't. Instead of feeling like those 2 plus years of sobriety were the worst in my life I was sitting in that chair watching him go up, happy for him that he had reached three years while at the same time sad for me and thinking, "damn....that could be me."

The last eight months of my in-and-out playing around with alcohol and thinking over how miserable my sobriety time was (or some of it) and what this person and that person did to "make" me go out and get drunk again....they have been some of the worst months of my life. I didn't embrace my sobriety...I didn't place as much importance on my sobriety...and I let resentments, jealousy, greediness, envy and probably a whole bunch of other crap cause me to give up on myself, not be grateful for all the blessings which came along because of and during my sobriety time.

May I never take my sobriety for granted anymore. I too thought that the promises had not come true for me. I felt "ripped off"...I did what I was supposed to do..worked hard...did the Steps...service work...prayed. I now have realized that the promises were coming true every single day--every single minute I was staying sober. I didn't get rich, I didn't get my own place, all my relationships were not restored in my life. The most important promise that did come true for me when I was sober before and since I have gotten sober again is that I AM STAYING SOBER AT ALL AND STAYING ALIVE.

Thank you for your posting. Your words expressed exactly how and what I was thinking which led me to think it was alright to drink again.

Re-read what you just posted as if you were one of us and see if it makes sense to you.  "Nothing (no such thing) is going right so I'm gonna wait for a year doing nothing but the same ole stuff that hasn't and doesn't work to assure myself that doing want doesn't work is what I should continue to do". 

Came to believe that a Power Greater than Myself could restore me to SANITY.  How did the first step come out for you? Sending prayers and my Higher Power to give you a poke.   You can only do 365 one day at a time unless you already started to drink or never stopped.