Today I am grateful for the people here, the years of relief from my symptom of dysfunction: Drinking; the chance to try out home schooling this year; my thriving music studio - all due to my recovery and you.
So, what am I grateful for? Good question, Tasha. In my opinion, the list is endless. However, I cannot begin to describe how I feel, today, without first telling you my story. In a nutshell, I drank too much, way too much, but you already know that. As for why, well, nobody knows. So, I'll start at the beginning.
It all stated back in the early days of high school. I had just gone through a major breakup, and being young and relatively naive I decided to drown my sorrows in a large glass of Iced tea, adult version of course. It never even occurred to me, back when, that it could turn on me so quickly. I never thought my drinking could spiral out of control. Unfortunately, it did. It quickly became a thorn of immense discomfort and it only got worse over time.
The word 'functional alcoholic' was a description the suited me just fine, if that word actually exists. Unfortunately, it did not end there. I was never able to connect the dots like most of us do, so I continued to suffer. The so-called link between active drinking and past troubles were nothing more than a strange coincidence. After a long battle of 'on again, off again' sobriety I was finally able to realize my mistakes. I had never put enough effort into getting sober to realize my full potential. So after years and years of alcoholic drunkenness I decided to give recovery an honest try. When I did, nothing was off limits.
As far as a list goes, well, it's pretty extensive. Career wise; I have nothing to complain about. There have been many opportunities along the way, some more lucrative than others. I had been an independent writer for many years before the paper industry went belly up. After that I fought tooth and nail for any opportunity, big or small. Now that I am sober, more doors are starting to open for me. I do some consulting work for a couple of online forums, and write quick op-ed pieces for various news outlets. I also supplement my income through various revenue streams, including; proofreading medical journals, doing computer repair work, day trading stocks and options, and even buying and selling online. There's a whole list of ideas floating around my head, but you need to know your limitations. The truth is, I have enormous potential, but staying sober will always be my first priority. Without that, where would we be?
Speaking of which; I also have a list of accomplishments related to sobriety. For some people; they may seem less than stellar compared to my career accomplishments, but to me they mean a great deal. For example, I was able to make amends to my 2 ex-wives over the span of 10 years. That admission has now blossomed into a wonderful friendship that has stood the test of time. I was able to make amends to my daughter as well, even after she disowned 10 years ago. You could only imagine the look on my face when she showed up at my 50th birthday party family in toe. The tears flowed for hours.
What about spirituality? It has the same relevance as everything else, doesn't it? For me, it does. I know, some people may have trouble with the word God, but not me. I made a real commitment to stay sober over 14 years ago and that same commitment extends to my church family as well. It's something we have to experience for ourselves before we can fully understand the word 'faith in its entirety. Other blessings include; family time, leisure time and hobbies, and of course helping others. That's what drives this alcoholic today, and I hope it inspires others as well.
-- Edited by Mr_David on Thursday 12th of May 2016 04:18:38 PM
It looks as though God has given me 'life' over death with this cancer thingy ... AND for the 2nd time in my life ... so I fig'r He's not done with me yet down here ... I believe I am to do some more work for Him whilst I'm still here ... so Today, I am grateful for the task at hand ...
and to list ALL the things I hold dear to my heart in gratitude for being sober, would last way into the wee hours of the morn'n, so I'll spare y'all for now, lol ...
I love my 'Family' here, and God Bless you all, Pappy
__________________
'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
I just did a step 5 session with one of my sponsees with over 29 years of sobriety. God had did so much for him in his sobriety. After cleaning house, we saw that the levels of gratitude had dropped.
So we both sought a fresh annointing of God's blessing, together with a practical gratitude list.
Thanks Tasha for this thread.