Getting people to like you is merely the other side of liking them. --Norman Vincent Peale
What does it mean to like other people? It means giving respect and attention to their opinions and perspectives on life. It means respecting their feelings, attitudes, and values without passing judgment or trying to control them. Clearly and simply, liking others means letting them be who they are and celebrating their individuality.
Openly expressing fondness for a friend is affirming for both people. Our expressions are gifts that will multiply for us when we've been honest and unselfish, free from ulterior motives.
We all want to be liked. And we've heard many times that to have a friend, one must be a friend. It's a formula that takes only a simple decision each time we share with another.
My actions will determine whether I'm liked today.
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
I don't agree wholeheartedly with the "to have a friend, one must be a friend..."
...been there, done that.... I think some people are so sick and into themselves, their own agendas of what they think they can get from others that they don't know how to be true friends. They don't know how to give. They take, take, take and when they have chewed you up until you are cud in their mouth, they spit you out. Betraying a trust, gossiping, manipulating and controlling people are not often interested in being a good friend to someone else....they are looking to find out what someone can do for them....period.
I used to want to be liked....I don't really care anymore who likes me. I will continue to be myself...friendly to others unless it is someone I have had to distance myself from to protect my own sanity and sobriety. I will continue to hold doors open for strangers, give some money to a person outside a 7-11 who asks me if I have a buck to spare and see where I can help others in need, in and out of AA. I think that is what God wants me to do and since I have had empathy for others and have been a giving person all my life (got it from my parents to treat others with respect and dignity) it comes natural to me.
So the last part of the posting above doesn't work for me anymore......"My actions will determine whether I'm liked today". My actions will determine whether God approves of me today". His love for me is the only thing I need in my life and if others "like" or even "love" me as a result of that, it is not a bad thing. If they don't, that's not my problem...it's theirs.
-- Edited by leavetherest on Tuesday 12th of January 2016 08:16:13 AM
I don't agree wholeheartedly with the "to have a friend, one must be a friend..."
That's okay ... ... ...
My take on this was similar to what is found in the Big BB ... "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" ... if that is the case, how can you not be friends?
I know, some people will not reciprocate and do the 'take, take, take' thingy but that doesn't mean I should become a snob because of it ... the way I treat others should come from the heart in a loving, caring fashion ... and if there are people that still want to 'abuse' our friendship, then you are correct, that is their problem, not mine ... all one can do is what comes from the heart, noth'n more ... (it's like we say when refer to 'keep'n our side of the street clean') ...
__________________
'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
