Neal,
First off, 4 weeks! Awesome!! Something is working!

I've been working through some sleep issues as well over the past month - I'm waking around 2-3 a.m. every morning and not getting back to sleep at all. The lack of sleep does mess with the mind. I have no advice because nothing is working for me to solve the sleep issues. I suspect that mine has something to do with events and what not at work as I seem to wake up with my mind racing through details of whatever is coming up during the day. Since I am already awake, I do some Bible reading, read in the BB and have a time of prayer. Still not sleeping any later, but I do feel that the time is productive. I also have a cup of herbal tea or sometimes go ahead and have my morning caffeine laden tea (Earl Grey) and read the newspaper if the paper route hits it early.

I try to distract my mind from the "what ifs" as much as possible. They can drive one almost crazy if you let them, but remember, sober anxiety is better than drunken insanity. I have what if conversations in my mind with my wife (who is blissfully sleeping away the early morning hours) and by the time she awakes, I can be madder than hell at her, for no reason at all, other than spending too much time alone in my head. Rational thought returns and it gets better.

At 4 weeks sober, you are still teaching yourself how to cope with anxiety without the numbness of alcohol. It may take your mind a while longer to recover. Keep reading, studying and seeking help from your HP. You ca make it through this patch.

It was hard for me for a few months after I sobered up....disruptive sleep, no sleep, too much sleep. Moods very low one day, up the next and depression kicked my butt. Eventually, after longer time staying sober, I felt "human" again. I sobered up at the same time my guy friend did and I had thoughts and fears that this guy either was going to start drinking again and I even thought that he was sneaking drinks. My mind went crazy....I checked the ice cube trays, actually paid attention to how many glasses we used each day in case an "extra" one was in the sink. I even smelled the damn things trying to catch him.

It took me well over a year to figure out what was going on. I was fearful of my own sobriety and I was transferring the fear of me picking up again over to him. I learned how to tell myself what we hear in the rooms....I cannot keep anyone but me sober.......and other similar expressions which have to do with me keeping my own side of the street clean (or in my case--keep my own glasses clean--LOL)....and realizing the things I cannot and can control.

And all that worry, fear and paranoia I had...waste of time because later on, I was the one who ended up picking up again. He managed to stay strong and sober throughout my experimentation phase.

Try and focus on yourself Neal. It is already difficult enough for alcoholics to get and stay sober. We sure don't need the extra burden on taking on someone else's sobriety.

-- Edited by hopefulone on Saturday 5th of December 2015 06:07:51 PM

Coffee sometimes gets the blame for lack of sleep and these days I rarely drink it and if I do it's only in the morning. But when I was new to AA and newly sober I had a lot of trouble sleeping. Anyone who had a head full of the memories I had, who had thinkng processes and reactions so badly programmed as mine were, would have trouble sleeping. I could have the best day, but it was always followed by a terrible night.

The cause for me was spiritual in nature. I couldn't have any kind of real peace or relationship with a god I knew nothing about, while I had all that rubbish swirling around in my head. The solution came through the steps. I instinctively knew that unless I cleaned house very soon, I would not survive. One Saturday I went to my sponsor's house and together we got a fourth step done. The next day, I took the fifth step. That night, I slept like a baby.

Yes, it is a great post Fyne Spirit....I remember my sleeping did get better after working the fourth and fifth step.....
Interestingly enough, for months my sleep has been disruptive......never really thought much of it until reading your post and I'll bet it is because I need to work those Steps again...which I will be doing with my new sponsor.

So glad and happy for you, Neal!