Hi there...
You are not alone...I got reprimanded recently, too. Not by my sponsor though. I think I would have accepted it a bit better had it been.
I think people who do that have the need to tell others what to do don't feel as much in control over their own lives. If it is something I can learn from, grow more and it will help me be a better person while I am on this ole earth, I am sure grateful. Otherwise, I try to "leave the rest".
(I have been told I am way too nice and sometimes it comes back to bite me in the butt. I am wearing thicker pants these days, though :)
Controlling others derives from the need to feel safe for me. The more peaceful easier path involves replacing fears with faith - vs. - trying to arrange the stage and players and make them stay put, as the BB speaks of.
All of us here have had the experience growing up, where we needed to put some order in the chaos around us in order to feel safe. This childhood survival skill can carry into adult hood - and we become adult children. (Another 12 step recovery group - ACA, Adult children of Dysfunction). This does not mean we are infantile or child like in our thinking or acting, it means we have carried or brought survival skills learned as a child into our adult lives.
As the surface issues are cleared away, the most harmful, life corrupting symptoms of dsyfunction are cleared away (such as drinking, drugging, sexing, over eating, shopping, controlling others or obsessing on others) we begin to see the root causes and conditions for these symptoms.
All of them have the same solution in the 12 steps that lead us to a Higher power and a spiritual path. Finding this, and thus having a way to replace fears with faith in our own understanding of a God or Higher power - is by far easier and more peaceful for self --- than playing God ourselves. Having an understanding of an all loving God or HP allows me to make choices for myself that would reflect what an all loving HP would wish for me. I do believe this would include a peaceful, self loving existence, as this is the foundation of how we are best for all others we share this Earth with.
XXX Hugs XXX
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
For me this is about taking the focus off of me even when there is nothing really going on. I learned to be quiet and stay on my side of the street and if there was something going on God knows about it better than I. Let go and let God gives me lots of rest time.
