Welcome to MIP HighPriestess......This is the way I look at meetings. This problem we share...Is a three part problem....Mental, Physical and Spiritual. It has a three part solution.....Recovery(Steps), Unity(Fellowship/meetings) and Service(Carrying the message/Giving back what so freely given to us.)
So if what I have is a three part solution....I'm going to continue to work on all three parts. Here's an interesting fact.....The only place I've been able to find all three parts together......Is at meetings.
I heard a guy once answer it like this....
Q: How long do I have to go to meetings?
A: You have to go to meetings until you want to go to meetings...Then you don't have to go anymore.
I was told "if you drank every day, you go to meetings every day!" But I didn't drink more than 5 years..
Meetings are not mandatory, HP. Some people in successful recovery go to very few. Some go to none at all. Over my time in AA, I have varied my attendance levels, from very few, to many, to LOTS! Not necessarily in that order.
I have also tried online meetings such as those at aaonline.net and other locations.
People in recovery who don't go to many (or any) meetings seem to drift away from the AA program. Once they drift away, some drink and get drunk. Not good.
Go to as many meetings as you need to to stay sober. Sobriety is the goal.
Let us know how it turns out, whatever you decide to do...
I figure this disease is out in the parking lot, doing push ups, waiting for the opportunity to strike again!
I'm not gonna give it that chance, if I have anything to do about it. So I still go to meetings, 3-4 a week.
At a meeting I can help another alcoholic, re-establish faith in a higher power, hear what I may or may not be doing to stay sober, and see my friends.
I'm safest in the "middle of the boat" so, I'm not ever gonna quit going, if I have anything to do about it!
What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our "spiritual condition". (AA BB p.85)
Meetings are not a requisite to maintain our spiritual condition any more than regular sex is a requisite to not cheating on your spouse. There are some in both camps that would argue that it is easier though. Also some that would argue that one has nothing to do with the other. The answer for you cannot come from someone else.
I attended meetings faithfully for three years, attending 372 meetings in my first 90 days, over 1000 in my first year. At the three year mark I stopped attending for a variety of reasons.
a) There simply weren't enough hours in the day. I was a single parent raising my toddler daughter while attending university. I was in the honors program and a double major in math and physics. I mention this last part to indicate that my homework was never sit in a tub and read Shakespeare. I found that I had a choice, I could meditate daily, or I could give up that time and attend meetings - but not both.
b) I found that the only time I locked my car door or sat with my back to the wall any longer was when I was at a meeting.
c) My tools for continuing recovery became more nuanced and subtle.
And so I quit going to meetings for seventeen years. My wife has since (three years ago) been ordered to meetings and I attend with her because I enjoy being with her, the time factor is no longer a factor, and it doesn't harm my recovery.
