Wednesday, after mum's funeral, after the post funeral bun fight, after the hour solitude driving to a meeting.
best suit on and big james says 'eyup mate, was it court no 1 or no 2' and I reply no james, my mum's funeral.
brutally, carelessly. The pain in his eyes showed how embarrased and hurt he was.The tears sprang to my friend's eyes.I'm sorry he blurted. No james.. I'm sorry. I was blunt. I was inconsiderate.
So I sat in the meeting. Some people knew. Some people were told. I fell asleep.
I woke with sarah lou pressed up to my left, jo to my right. Gently stopping me from slipoing of the chair. My sponsor was in the alanon meeting.
I didn't share.
Here it comes though. At the end of the meeting. The hugs. The handshakes. The kisses on the cheek by both men and women. And Ben. The man I thought had been found dead two years ago. In front of me. Shaking my hand. Saying I'm sorry for your loss. Roofer Ben.
f#ck me. Roofer Ben. I thought you'd died. You're alive. I'm glad you're alive and sober. Damn near broke him in two I had to hug him so tight.
big smile. Ben now nearly three years ODAAT. .. my spirits flying. He said when the other ben died, so many people thought it was him. He said to himself....no more buggering about now...got a sponsor...works the programme. ..do you not just love this?
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It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you got. BB
That's beautiful, Bill, and thank you for sharing. Someone shared in a meeting about a week ago that a fellow AA'er had died. I didn't know the person. All the gasps in the room after that announcement had been made it clear that so many did. I am glad your friend is still around and your bear hug and the warmth you gave him when you are in pain helped comfort and support him. I do love that!
