I'm 56 and working harder than ever in my life (full time job and side business). I suppose this is because early sobriety required so much time and attention. And because the Recession pretty much wiped me out. I'll remember not to make emotional investments in the future.
Over the past few days I've been battling a fever and trying to keep it down, but my body seems to have hit a wall. I woke up exhausted. So I called in sick today and slept until afternoon. I feel much better. I don't like to call in sick unless I'm sweating and vomiting; but I decided this fell into the category of HALT. I feel a little guilty about it. I suppose that too will pass.
Trying to make better choices these days. I'm still making codependent choices and putting others' needs first, and not being authentic and genuine to others because I want them to be pleased and happy. Ongoing project in process, it seems.
Lol, yes. BTW, I forgot to say, "My name's Mike and I'm an alcoholic". Saw an elderly man in the grocery store the other day; buying a liter of Old Crow or something like. The $21 bottle (and that was the only item he was buying). There but by the Grace of God...
-- Edited by TallMikeH on Monday 5th of May 2014 08:43:46 PM
Hi Mike and welcome to the board. yep, I'm in my fifties as well and although I have almost a year of sobriety I am amazed my body didn't bounce right back into shape by now--ha! It's like I expect it to be as good as it was although I abused it for so many years and was younger then.
Good for you that you kept HALT in mind and are taking care of yourself. You remind me so much of myself about feeling guilty--when I worked for someone else, I hated to call in sick until I was deathly ill. (Funny how if someone would say something which I let hurt my feelings I had no problem about walking out, though.) I am also a people pleaser--well, more of a God pleaser now. However, I do still feel the need to please others at times. That may be alright with my HP and something I will hopefully know when it is alright to do and not question if so.
Been to plenty of stores and only walked out with booze and sometimes cigs. (Still smoke.) I made alcohol so important a part of my life--it was a "food group" to me, because if it came down to it, I would rather have to do without food than alcohol.
Welcome Mike! Glad to have you here with us. Yes, we have to take care of ourselves first. If we don't, we don't have anything to offer work or otherwise. God can't work through us if our house isn't in order. I had the priority of life upside myself. I had to learn God first, Me second and then everyone else. It was always the other way around.
The guilty is your diesase talking to you. Remember, your diesase wants nothing good for you. It wants you irritable, restless and discontent. In that vulnerable state, it has power over you. Let go of the guilt, it's only blocking you from God, yourself and others.
Hey Mike, welcome to the MIP board! Glad to have you with us. You're gonna like it here. The folks around here are very good. I like them all, and I know you will too.
