I have been attending AA meetings regularly for 100 + days. I have not drank and am working my program. My sponsor had to go out of town to see her son that is having surgery so I don't want to bother her right now.
My question is I am married to an alcoholic that does not think he has a problem. I am very close to ending the relationship but am taking my time since I am so new to the program and I have been told that I should not make a major change like that so soon to my sobriety.
So I am wondering what do you think about me attending and Al Anon meeting?
((((debird))))...go and leave your AA program out side that room as best you can because the approach is from another direction tho the steps and traditions are the same. I am doubled...both programs. HP led me into that program first because HP is higher power and knew much more than I about what it was, what I should do and how it would turn out should I participate and work the program. My then spouse was alcoholic and addict. She chased my drinking and thought that drinking the way I did was the way it was supposed to be done. I tried to teach her and it might have killed her as it almost killed me.
The meetings are open as the door is...go, sit down...all the way down. Listen, learn, practice like you practice your AA recovery.
Hi Marie, ... I'm not in your position, but if I were, I'd PM 'justadrunk' (Tasha) ... she has a lot of wisdom on 'both' sides, as do many others here ... I've been reading her posts for over a year now and feel she has a 'keen' sense of what both sides of the fence are like ... Give her a PM, and get her take on this ... (it'll probably mirror Jerry thoughts ...)
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Congratulations on 100+ days of meetings and how great that is! You are doing super! Great advice above and I'm too new too add much other than to tell you "good for you" on staying sober and to let you know that I am sorry you are going through that with your husband.
BTY
I can only speak as a member in good standing in AA. Congrats on your time DB...That's awesome. I'm curious at 100+ days what step you are working on? I know for myself finding the solution had to come before everything and everyone...Or I'd be dead. I don't know if alanon would be good for you or not....It sure won't help your husband's problem. I do know that as an alcoholic...If my spouse was interfering with my sobriety...Big change or not...I would do what was good for me. And what was good for me was giving this program my undivided attention. I completely gave myself to this simple program.
Thank you all for your posts. This morning I was feeling really down and almost didn't go to my meeting. The majority that attend this meeting are mostly men. They have spoken often of having the support of their wives, girlfriends etc. so I wasn't sure I would get anything out of it.
At the last minute I pulled in and went inside. There actually turned out to be more women this morning and one of the ladies brought up the topic of finding balance in a relationship and not having the support of her boyfriend. Then another lady started talking about her problems with her husband being jealous of her meetings. It was what I needed to hear. I had not spoke at a meeting for almost two weeks but I found my voice to thank the lady that brought up the topic because I needed to hear that I was not alone. I guess God does work in mysterious ways.
We hear that courage is fear that has said its prayers and thanks for the demonstration Debird. God did work and still does work in mysterious ways for me also and my work is to listen to the voice of HP and then follow. "Place me where you want me...tell me what to do". ((((hugs))))
