God, Grant me the Serenity
To accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
and Wisdom to know the difference.

We say this prayer a lot...I remember the first time I said this prayer in rehab....I didn't have a clue what it meant...I figured the things I could not change....My alcoholism....For one.  Courage to change the things I can...The way I was living. I guess I looked at it like...Accepting something was something I had to do in my mind....And changing was something I had to do...Period.

I found a few pieces on this prayer I liked...Thought I'd share. I know I clung onto this prayer in my very early days not drinking....Like a security blanket.

This first one is from Barefoot World....

Many folks do not understand the meanings of the Serenity Prayer, and of consequence are left in a limbo of constant confusion as they continue to battle the conditions of life.

Let us examine this marvelous Prayer of Supplication to the Higher Power, which speaks to all human beings from deep down within.......

God.... A name and concept of this Higher Power, which most folks erroneously conceive to be outside themselves, separate from and alien to themselves, a "Santa Claus" god which is supposed to fulfill their dreams, their wishes and wants, to "make" the conditions of Life comply with their desire and their idea of "religious correctness"... Sorry about that, it just doesn't happen that way.... The Big Book of AA, on Page 55, establishes the conditions and locale of our relationship and understanding which we are to acquire of "Our" Higher Power.....

"We finally saw that faith in some kind of God was a part of our make-up, just as much as the feeling we have for a friend. [ But of a much greater friend, for in fact it is our own self, Our Own True Self, that portion of localized divinity that He has given to each of His Children. ] Sometimes we had to search fearlessly, but He was there. He was as much a fact as we were. We found the Great Reality deep down within us. In the last analysis it is only there that He may be found. It was so with us." ..... We are never separate from God. Separation from God is only an illusion that we have created.

Grant...to assure (in its original meaning) a knowingness of the orderliness of God's eternity, a prized condition that we earn through our efforts of learning to apply the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous to our lives, not an "undeserved gift" as we hear so many times around the tables of AA.

Me... the I Am, of self, the True Self, that portion of self which knows that it is, in all instances.

Serenity... Again a word that is misunderstood, that most folks take to mean a quiet, unruffled, calm, undisturbed, tranquil condition in the circumstances of life about us. In truth what it really means is Presence of Mind in the Here and Now, viewing the Reality of whatever conditions and circumstances that may be occurring ... Not fighting Reality with illusions of how things should or should not be.

To Accept... to acknowledge the Truth of Reality, to take what is offered or given, to receive willingly... As we are given Life, one moment, one condition, one circumstance, one happening at a time...God's Life for God's Kids has to be a happening. It can't be any other way.

the things I cannot change....Reality, period...Reality cannot be changed. It simply is. And no amount of mind bending illusion creating will change it. The Truth is the Truth and it needs no defense. The only thing we humans can do with Reality is change our point of view, our perspective. Reality itself will remain unchanged.

Courage... The ability to make the Responsible Decisions Necessary and take Action to DO the things we already know need to be done in the face of unknown outcomes and consequences.. Our Life is determined by the decisions and actions that we take and the thoughts that we hold, by no other forces. We must in all cases live with the consequences of our decisions or our lack of decision. Life cannot be lived any other way.

to change the things I can...The only thing that we can change is our perspective as we view Reality, learning to make better Responsible Decisions, living our way to better thinking each moment.

And Wisdom to Know the Difference... Wisdom, an acquired trait through the experience of life, a recognition and remembrance of the things which do or do not coincide with Reality, which do or do not work, of the things which are true, which are honest, for that is the meaning of Truth, Rigorously Honest.

It has been said that a Wise Man's education toward understanding his own universe and reality (and to some extent yours) will embrace as much folly as he can afford. It is only to the degree that he can afford it, that he will be able to laugh at himself. If he embraces more folly than he can afford, he will cry.

The wise man knows that success in life is achieved by simply putting a whole lot of mistakes together in a way that works.

"Wisdom is not something you think, Wisdom is something you DO!!"

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This second one is from Hazelden...Where I went to rehab and left early to do AA.

The Serenity Prayer: Striking a balance
between acceptance and change

God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can, and
Wisdom to know the difference.

Members of Alcoholics Anonymous have enthusiastically embraced this prayer -- known as the Serenity Prayer -- almost from the moment they discovered it. In fact, these 25 words are widely taken as a succinct statement of a path to sanity and sobriety.

The Serenity Prayer meshes perfectly with the spirituality of AA's Twelve Steps. In her book The Kitchen Mystic: Spiritual Lessons Hidden in Everyday Life, author Mary Hayes-Grieco notes that this prayer "contains the sum total of what spiritual life is: a series of lessons about when to accept life as it is, and when to make changes for the better."

There are several versions of the Serenity Prayer, each with slightly different wording. Also, there are conflicting accounts of the prayer's origin. It has been variously attributed to an ancient Sanskrit text, Aristotle, St. Augustine, St. Francis of Assisi, and others. Many AA members were first exposed to the prayer in 1948, when it was quoted in the Grapevine, an AA periodical. There it was credited to theologian Reinhold Niebuhr.

Despite its brevity, the Serenity Prayer accurately expresses a central problem of addiction and prescribes a timeless solution. In its message about acceptance, it echoes insights from Bill W., cofounder of AA. In the book Alcoholics Anonymous, (published by AA World Services), Bill described the core trait of alcoholics as self-centeredness -- something he called "self will run riot." He further described the alcoholic as "an actor who wants to run the whole show; is forever trying to arrange the lights, the ballet, the scenery and the rest of the players in his own way." Bill's solution: "First of all, we had to quit playing God."

What some alcoholics seek to achieve is a sense of absolute control -- one that is simply not possible for human beings. This hankering for control has two aspects. First is an attempt to control the behavior of others, a strategy that addicts cling to despite its repeated failure. Second is the attempt to control feelings by medicating them with mood-altering chemicals. This strategy, too, is doomed to failure. Ironically, the quest for absolute control leads to misery, which may contribute to substance abuse problems.

On the other hand, for some alcoholics the need to control may be a response to the unmanageability caused by their out-of-control use of drugs. Either way, the Serenity Prayer speaks wisdom to addicts and non-addicts alike.

On one level, the prayer is about learning to accept external circumstances that we cannot change. But on a deeper level, the prayer points to a fact about our inner life: We cannot directly control our feelings. However, we can influence our feelings through two other factors we can control -- our thinking and our actions. Doing this moves us on to another quality described in the Serenity Prayer: courage.

This is the quality that psychiatrist Viktor Frankl displayed during his incarceration in Nazi concentration camps. Frankl concluded that everything can be taken from us except one thing "the last of human freedoms -- to choose one's own attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way," he wrote in Man's Search for Meaning (Beacon Press).

Frankl noted that the prisoners most likely to survive were those who had a vivid sense of purpose in life. Moreover, even in the humiliation of the camps, prisoners still had choices about how to act. Some betrayed their fellow inmates and secretly allied with German guards. Others committed acts of daily heroism, everything from sharing a last crust of bread to caring for the sick.

If Frankl could make choices in the desolation of a concentration camp, then we can start making them in our daily lives. Ultimately courage is about this willingness and capacity to choose. And even in the most arduous circumstances, two choices are almost always available to us: where to place our attention and what action to take next.

The Serenity Prayer is a wide door, one that's open to people of all faiths and backgrounds. People who live this prayer discover how to strike a dynamic balance between acceptance and change. This gift is precious, and it's one that we can enjoy for a lifetime.

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This third one I found on Addictionblog.org....

What does the serenity prayer mean?

Rabbi Shais Taub....Published: January 2, 2011

The serenity prayer & AA

Most people who know even just a little bit about addiction and alcoholism know about those meetings where people get together and all say the Serenity Prayer together and then say, Hi, my name is ____ and Im a ____.

Original serenity prayer

The truth is that the Serenity prayer did not originate with the 12-Step movement. Its most well-known version is attributed to the 20th century theologian and social commentator, Reinhold Niebuhr, but many Niebuhr included concede that the prayer has been around in various forms for centuries. Interestingly, the prayer is not part of any religions liturgy and, as such, is truly a non-sectarian prayer.

Enough background. What does the prayer mean?

What does the serenity prayer mean?

There are three parts to the Serenity Prayer. The first asks for the serenity to accept the things that cant be changed; the second asks for the courage to change the things that can be changed; and the third asks for the wisdom to know the difference between the things that can and cannot be changed.

In other words, were asking G-d for three things serenity, courage, and wisdom. Serenity has its time and place; courage has its time and place; and wisdom is the ability to know whether its a time and place for serenity or a time and place for courage.

For instance, being resigned to a situation that can and should be changed is not really serenity so much as complacency, while trying to change something that is just a fact of reality isnt really courage so much as foolishness. Therefore, we dont want to use serenity to deal with situations that really call for courage and we dont want to use courage to deal with situations that really call for serenity.

Serenity or courage?

The problem is that self-deception, denial and our inherent prejudices make it hard for us to to tell these two kinds of situations apart. Sometimes we trick ourselves into just accepting something that really is our responsibility to take care of because we are afraid of dealing with it. In that case, what we really need is courage not serenity. Other times, we are convinced that if we would just try harder, come one stronger, give things another chance, then we will be able to alter some aspect of the truth to be more to our liking. We do this because in our perfectionist drive to control people, places and things, we believe that reality ought to be different than it is and therefore, we are sure, we just need more grit and gumption to see things through. But what we really need is the ability to let go and let G-d. We dont need courage in that situation, but serenity.

So, we pray to our Higher Power to guide us in honestly assessing all situations so that we will come to the proper decision serenity or courage.

Serenity prayer exercises

One general guideline that I have personally found helpful is the me-you principle. If something needs to change, it needs to change in me, while if something about you seems to be my problem, then what I really need to do is realize that you are who you are right now and accept that truth. Its funny how it works out. When I dont waste my energy trying to change you, I seem to have a lot more energy left over to change myself and when I work on changing myself, I seem to have a lot less problems with you.

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I like em all.....I like the prayer.....What are your thoughts on this prayer?