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Post Info TOPIC: Hi All, I'm New Here And Need To Ask A Question


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Hi All, I'm New Here And Need To Ask A Question
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I'm Jalen, 47 years old, and getting ready to detox tomorrow. Just curious if someone could give me guidance. Is it ok to post a "newbie" topic here, or are there specific forums? My apologies, but I just found this site tonight and it's a bit confusing.

Thanks for any help. 



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MIP Old Timer

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We only have one forum here...You're good. Are you going into a facility for detox followed by a rehab program?...Or just to dry out? Welcome by the way...You're in a good place here...And you're making a real good decision.

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Ah, thanks so much for the replay Stepchild. Just to dry out at this point, but at 47, and being an alcoholic for many years, I'm sure I will need some sort of AA type of structure. I can stop at times, but I always go back. Need to find a way to see the truth that this stuff is the devil.

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Welcome! It's far easier and safer to go the route of detox. Just know that you only have to do this once. If you are serious about changing your life, and you take suggestions that are offered to you in treatment, then follow up and take those suggestions in AA - sobriety will be yours.

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Please, can anyone tell me what to expect from detoxing? I've always been one to afraid to ask for help (this is the first time), and I have no idea what to expect. Beer is the evil culprit for me.


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Jalen wrote:

I can stop at times, but I always go back.


 I know the routine well....I'm a slow learner...I didn't get this till I was 51....And it beat me good. I did go to detox and rehab...That was costing me a pretty penny...And I was flat ass broke so a brother paid for it. I plan on paying him back...But I did leave early because I could see AA was the route to long term sobriety...I just had to do what they did. That's the only thing that has worked for me. I'd suggest you google a meeting near you....And go to the first one you can...Show up a little early...Say you're new....And listen. Get a copy of the big book...Read the Doctor's Opinion and the first 3 chapters...Give you a pretty clear idea if you're alcoholic or not....Post here and ask questions....There is a solution Jalen....It's worth putting in the effort to get it.

Big Book online.

http://anonpress.org/bb/

It's a text book...Get one and study it......It has all the answers.



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I was a beer man myself...How many were you drinking a day up to now?

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Thanks so much. A bit unsure and scared, but it HAS to be done.

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"I was a beer man myself...How many were you drinking a day up to now?"

 

A case a day at least. And you? 



-- Edited by Jalen on Saturday 7th of December 2013 08:39:49 AM

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I was drinking a 30 pack a day...Morning till night. I couldn't funtion without it. Detox isn't bad...I wouldn't want to make a career out of doing it. They'll keep an eye on you. Give you medication to prevent siezures...Some type of Benzo...And something to make you sleep....I slept the whole five days I detoxed...Then I started defogging. It took me longer to clear up from the meds than the alcohol I think. It won't be painful though....Doing it alone can be....It can kill you....So you're making the right choice.



-- Edited by Stepchild on Saturday 7th of December 2013 08:45:32 AM

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MIP Old Timer

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Jalen wrote:

Thanks so much. A bit unsure and scared, but it HAS to be done.


 I haven't met anybody yet that wasn't scared of this thing...It's not exactly where we plan our whole lives ending up. It's a frightening thing to have something in your life you have no control over....That scared the crap out of me. My first meeting I was scared to go to. When I left after one hour...I knew I was in the right place. I love em now.



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If I can ask, how long did you drink the 30 pack consistently (days, years), and what were your symptoms of withdrawels? Just trying to gauge my own problem here.

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It varies from person to person, time to time. are you doing this by yourself? do you have any medical conditions?

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I'd say the last six months of my drinking...It is progressive. I couldn't eat and I'd start shaking if I was just running low on it. It overwhelmed me. No reason for you to get to that point.

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I wouldn't recommend detoxing on your own.

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Has anyone ( at least in this thread) tried to detox on their own? I have done it as recently as 3 weeks ago, painful to say the least. Just curious what your withdrawal symptoms have been. I get a bit shaky (fingers), but the anxiety and depression are the worst. Let alone, it takes me 3 days to "see straight".

Just curious to hear others "symptoms".

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Did it on my own...but went to a lot of AA meetings while doing it....

High blood pressure...shakes...fear...emotional unstability...brain going in circles...nightmares...cravings...bitchy...PMS and the urge to kill...overeating...not eating...long days..drinking water...eating sweets...depression...anxiety..and the list goes on...

If I hadn't a had a small business? I would have done it at a Detox Center...

It DID get better :)



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I can relate to ALL of that. I had a nightmare (still intoxicated and coming down), that the ceiling fan turned into some kind of Raven and tried to attack me. Good grief. Just awful.

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I don't know that you have detoxed before.

I quit drinking for short periods in the past but always went back. Detox is so painful yet we return to drinking again shortly after. We truly are unmanageable and insane.

There is the physical detox which takes a little while, then there is the mental/emotional/spiritual detox after that.

I highly recommend getting involved in your local AA group(s) and hooking up with the oldtimers there. They will help you .. they have been there. The hardest part is doing what they "suggest". You will need them if you are to be successful.

All the best.

Bob R

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Wow, what a great site. So glad I've found this. I'm going to need it, guys. Even if it just a supplement to detox and/or AA. You all have been so helpful.

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Good morning and welcome to this A.A. recovery forum!  You're going to make good friends here and find plenty of good folks to help you.  I hope you'll also attend lots and lots of A.A. meetings in your local area.  The meetings are what we call the "A.A. Fellowship".  You need fellowship with other A.A. members.  But, most importantly, in the basic A.A. text we call the Big Book, you'll also find the 12 Steps of A.A. and instructions on how to work them.  This is what we call the A.A. "Program".  You need the 12 Step Program to stay sober.  You won't stay sober without it.  Yet, before you do any of that, you'll first need to be treated by a doctor as you're withdrawing from alcohol.  Alcohol is a very dangerous drug to try to withdraw from, so you definitely need medical attention to withdraw from it safely.  Don't forget....detox will get you sober, but, if you're an alcoholic of my type, ONLY the 12 Step Program will keep you sober.  Blessings, Mike D.



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Going to a Detox center will provide you a safety net. Some people develop issues that require medical help. Being in a place where you are monitored is good. It is your life. Take care of it.

If you can swing a detox, I would go. Alcoholism is a confusing disease. It tells us we don't have it, then when we see we do... It tells us we can beat it in our own. We can't.

It is great that you are doing this. At 47 you have so much more life to live. AA is a new way of living. It is far more than not drinking.

Relax. Take a deep breath. You are on the right track. Detox and AA meetings, make new friends and go daily if you can. It will work.

Let us know how you are doing!



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Glad you found us, Jalen. Lots of great support here.

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I did detox on my own. What a fool I was for doing so, though. I had most of the symptoms the others have mentioned. I was drinking on average 16 drinks a day however, depending on how sorry I felt for myself on a particular day, I drank 20 and more drinks.
There is a lot of stuff on the internet about withdrawals, and withdrawing on your own. I was lucky with my detoxing, but some folks aren't and can go into seizures and unless there is a medical facility nearby and/or someone is with you to call the squad to pick you up and take you to one, you can die of seizures.
Again, I was a fool. And a very lucky one. I hope you are smarter and if not, have a lot of "luck" on your side.

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You all have been so helpful. I'm not sure what to expect, but I'll be there in a few hours. I'm the type of person that's never asked for help in my life. I knew I needed it, but felt ashamed if anyone I knew found out. Well, to heck with that. I've been sitting and realizing that so many people go through this; I won't be the first, and I won't be the last. Still a bit scared of what to expect, but it's the end result I need for the sake of my 3 teenagers.

I have no other options.



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Jalen, it is scary walking into that meeting for the first time, but then you'll never have to do it for the first time again! I hope it goes well. I know it will.

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A friend told me today that sometimes in life you just have to do things that are hard. I've worked at home for the last 15 years with some very flexible hours -- probably led to most of my drinking. But anyway, I just have no choice. My kids are looking at me with an extremely worried look in their eyes and I just can't take it. T

That said, I've always been one that strongly believes "see what others see, feel what they feel inside", and it's just made it worse. No hiding anymore. Just hope they don't take my cell phone. :)


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I had to get used to two things that I wasn't use to doing at all....Hearing things I didn't want to hear....And doing things I didn't want to do. It came down to this for me....My way didn't work...I see it working for them....I guess I better start listening and following up on what is suggested to me. That's all it took for me.

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Stepchild wrote:

I had to get used to two things that I wasn't use to doing at all....Hearing things I didn't want to hear....And doing things I didn't want to do. It came down to this for me....My way didn't work...I see it working for them....I guess I better start listening and following up on what is suggested to me. That's all it took for me.


 I heard that. I'm getting the advice and have manipulated it for way too long. Are we all as addicts this manipulative? It's just ridiculous what I could come up with to steal a drink and avoid going to treatment to this point.



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Apparently we alcoholics, espesially as newcomers, can be very manipulative. It's one of our main survival skills. We become expert at conning all those around us and all those that try to help, even doctors. Our Big Book metions doctors specifically, seldom have we told them the truth. But we only con ourselves in the end.

Early recovery is no walk in the park. As a wise man once said "pain is the touchstone of all spiritual growth". And as spiritual growth is the AA path to recovery, along with the joy it brings, there will be painful moments. My natural reaction to pain is to try and avoid it, rationalise, supress, decieve or medicate. None of these methods were successful in avoiding the pain, though some postponed it.

The only thing that worked for me in the end, was to get honest, and take the steps.

God bless,

MikeH.

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I have to be completely honest here. I looked through the 12 steps and a lot of the tone is of a spiritual nature. After what I went through in my early life (alcoholic dad, very cold mother whom I never bonded with), it's probably no wonder I didn't grow up trusting a higher power.

Again that being said, I'm willing to do what it takes, but I have absolutely no religious background. Just not sure how to deal with this aspect of AA. Am I alone in this form of thinking?

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Jalen wrote:

Am I alone in this form of thinking?


No...Not at all. This chapter here deals with step two....You're not alone. Actually you're very much like a lot of the people that started this program.....Give it a read...Ask any questions you got...And then I'd suggest you read it again. I love this chapter. I've probably read it 50 times.

http://anonpress.org/bb/Page_44.htm



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Stepchild wrote:
Jalen wrote:

Am I alone in this form of thinking?


No...Not at all. This chapter here deals with step two....You're not alone. Actually you're very much like a lot of the people that started this program.....Give it a read...Ask any questions you got...And then I'd suggest you read it again. I love this chapter. I've probably read it 50 times.

http://anonpress.org/bb/Page_44.htm


 Thanks, Stepchild. Good read. I'll have to keep an open mind now after reading that. :)



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Having an open mind is important...

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No religious background is good. No twisted alcoholic misconception of god/HP.

Just detox and get started with reading and meetings. I would say to pray to your concept of God.

Let it happen. It does not need to be complicated. One of the old saints is that thesis a simple program for complicated people.

Ha!

So true :)

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Aloha Jalen and welcome to the board from the Pacific.  Reading your questions and statements and the responses from the MIP family here I get to revisit my own entry into recovery.   You have been responded to with honestly and love, compassion, empathy and real experiences of what worked.  This is what I detoxed on.  I sat with an open mind and listened, listened, listened.  I didn't let alcohol interfere for once in my life and sitting and listening with my eyes to the walkers in this program who were getting out of the program what I thought I could get out of the bottle kept me in the rooms.  I relate more to some of those who shared with you here because of the similarities of our journeys.  We are not exactly from the same mold...we have our differences and it is the similarities which got me sober and have kept me that way.  My elder sponsor suggested that "you try and use whatever is available to gain and maintain your sobriety" and he was adamant and I've done that and it works when you work it.  

You sound ready...great...drop what you've been doing and come do what we do.  Detox is a tool...use it as best you can.  Listen to those professionals cause they know things about alcohol you and many of us don't.  Religion?  Mine is the steps and the traditions and the slogans and more.  I work the steps religiously and don't play God any more.  When I made the decision that I wanted what these other seriously sober people had I let go of Power and Control (1st step, 2nd step, 3rd step) and I stopped the manipulation that went with it.  I still manipulate myself for program first and always.  Do your detox and be grateful for it...be scared and afraid and do it anyway...the fear won't kill you, just slow you down a bit which is good because you don't want to miss even one little step of this journey.

Let us know how it comes out for you.  Family helps family.  Family loves family.   smile



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Jalen,
Just checking to see how you are doing today?????

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