Over the 12 months when my life crashed around me, I shut myself off more and more from the people I knew. On those rare occasions when people who knew me asked how I was, I lied and told them I was fine. The truth was that I was isolated, desperate and utterly without hope. I knew the end was near, and I didn't care; in fact, when it came I was actually relieved.
When I entered the program, my life became the antithesis of what it had been before. Rather than isolating, I went to meetings; instead of eating alone, I went out with groups of people afterwards; and instead of lying about things being fine, I learned to speak my truth and tell people what was really going on with me.
Today I know that the only way I can stay comfortable in my own skin is by letting other people into my life and sharing with them what I'm going through. Alone, my head will still lie to me, but when I reach out to others and tell them honestly what I'm thinking, feeling or doing, that's when the miracle of recovery takes place.
Today I know the importance of finding someone you can tell the truth to, because we can't, and don't, do this alone.
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Copyright @ 2013 Michael Z
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'