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Post Info TOPIC: Touchy subject in Alcoholics Anonymous?
Miami Sober


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Touchy subject in Alcoholics Anonymous?
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I would really like to hear how it's done in other regions. Some of the members (Old & new) feel it is time to define Sobriety in the opening of the meeting. YES, it is not for me to tell others how to work thier program.  YES, what someone claims as thier Sobriety date is between them & their HP. YES, sometimes it is a "buyer beware" type of situation when you listen to the messages. Yes, we are all human & God's children trying to get better. Yes, I am aware that I am a card-carrying member of Control Issues Anonymous. & NO, we do not govern. But am I crazy to think we have the right to set a certain standard in the room? Be Honest, I can take it. I'm asking because I really want to be educated here. There should be a certain thread of common sense in the decisions made concerning the rooms. Doesn't this affect all who are serious about recovery?


For the record I have three years & I was taken under wing by some real old timers. I consider myself a little hard core. I have a GREAT desire to stay Sober and work the most honest program that I can. For me part of that honesty is not deluding myself as far as "marijuanna maintenance" "diet pills" or "because this is AA we only deal with alcohol in here" I truly believe that we are ALL addicts. My choice of addiction was Alcohol.         Sometimes reading something in print does not exactly convey the mood or the tone of whats being said, so please understand I would really like to know if I am way off here. I'm not angry, voice is not raised. It feels right, but will I look back a year from now and say "What was I thinking?" 


Thanks all.


 



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zoomie


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If you read in the 12 traditions it states "each group is automis" (sp) meaning money and other things.  Each group is different and has different ways of doing things.  Without some kind of order,things would be crazy.  But it all depends.  It is also said if you do not like one group,find another.  I use to be a big mouth,but now I just go with the flow and live and let live.  I do not like somethings in my group,but as a whole it's alright.  Too it's principles over personalities.


I went to a GSR meeting once with my sponcer and boy did the cats and dogs fight.  My only beef was that the specail needs people had audio tapes for the deaf.  Huh?



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Phil


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I can only share with you Miami...about how things are carried on..in meetings ..in all Ive attended..and been a member of...in Ontario Canada...


All groups stick to AA formats..and take it from there..re group concience meetings..if theres a problem within the group..its up to them to solve those problems...as a team...


In the past..I have had to change groups because of personalities..before principles..


Those groups have either..got it turned around to the way, it should be...or folded..


A lot of our meetings here are FTF. Discussion..step meetings..


And it is mentioned that when discussing...what weve read..that we keep it to.. how it pertains to our alcohol recovery.


It is also mentioned that crosstalk and disruptions of any kind..will not be tolerated..


We try to keep a tight rein..


And I think the rest of it..has been mentioned allready...


Individually...its a live and let live thing...and let go and let God..


Keep an open mind..take what one needs..and leave the rest...


Weed programs..pill programs...not my stuff..


My program is all I hafta be concerned with...and helping others..If they want help...


 


 



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Easy Does it..Keep It Simple..Let Go and Let God..
Miami Sober


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Yes, this is a 'resentment' group, as in we took our coffee pot and....   There were things in the old room that were practically criminal (money missing, room manager preying on new women,etc) and that room folded. Funny though,   that was my Home group, I found my sponsor there, I got Sober there & I work a strong program. I believe we may be a little sensitive (ha ha) to any viruses developing again.  Chris that comment "we try to keep a tight reign" is exactly what I mean. Because in a "check your motives" moment you know that it is about maintaining the integrity of the Group as a whole.


But consider this: Can you imagine Any of the rooms or comittees coming up with the Steps or Traditions today?? I can't. there seems to be such chaos.



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amanda2u2


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I told you that I found some of the same things when I got more involved with a group here,,  well,, as chair I talked to some people,, both newcomers and people with some years of ....  hmmm...  I was going to say 'sobriety' and then realized I usually say 'recovery',, you know there is a difference , right?  anyway...   newcomers were being turned off by what was happening, and elders were being turned off,, and it was increasingly just a little clique of people that liked what was going on.  I called New York headquarters and got my regional person there, who talked to me and gave me the names of the district people and I didn't call just one, but called them all. They said that there are certain requirements...  self-sufficient and autonomous does not mean anything goes.  They came to our meetings,, and we scheduled some business meetings,,,  did a group conscience...  and made a lot of changes. That was funny though, cuz it was a nother clique of controlling people who pushed a lot of their agendas through, and we ended up with the same problems only different people. but it worked out in the long run cuz the original people causing the problems did not like it that the regional people and the head from New York were watching and attending meetings. They kept quoting the autonomous thing too,,, that they could do what they want.  It ended up the treasurer was invited to end her term, and a lot of shake up... then..  all the ones that were egotistical decided it wasn't worth it now that the group was more in contact with New York. 


I told them if I wanted to be surrounded by such bs I would go back out to a bar. That I was in AA for recovery, and not to act out my dry drunk schtick.


Well, so, in conclusion,,, there is sometimes a fine line between being too perfectionistic with humans,,  and letting chaos reign. Here is New York's number,, and they can tell you much more definitively than we can here: 


 http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/default/en_services_aa.cfm?pageid=33


God bless you,


amanda



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cooncatbob


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Here in Northern Cal, for most folks you can't be sober if you aren't clean.
Some AAs are the snobs of the 12 step world. I do AA & NA and in someways NA got it right, alcohol is a drug and we must abstain from all drugs in order to recover. But on the other hand alot of NAs revel in being the badboys of the 12 step world and their behavior has caused alot of meeting to lose their facilities. Bob.

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GammyRose


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Miama, I think you all are on the right track, but there are bound to be a few casulties.  It was announced last night that we are having a group conscience meeting next week...everyone started moaning...what's it about this time? If it goes as usual, 3 or 4 will be at the meeting.


Several months ago I posted on here about the treasurer, who just self-appointed himself, old-timer 36 years sober, just moved to this area awhile back...he started passing around a spiral notebook, insisting that everyone sign in, put their sobriety date and phone number.. then this went into a unlocked filing cabinet in the church fellowship hall. Many people where upset, but no one wanted to offend him, no meeting about it. A lot of this was because we have many probation people coming to meetings, I went on AA website, got the AA statement on helping the courts and probation departments, how we cooperate in this area... which we do. I also found in many pamplets how we don't have sign in sheets and we don't keep offical records.It took me several weeks to get up the nerve, much prayer, to approach him about the matter, by this time , we had no probation people coming to meeting anymore. He became very defenceive, told me to go start my own group and he would start his own, we would see which one lasted. I just said," please read the literature, lets talk later.' The next week , he took his notebook home... but I can tell he is still upset and there is some resentment there.I was kind of upset no one would back me on this, but I'm over that. We now have the probation people back, I know that's a sore spot with some but there are many in our group ,who now have years of sobriety and that's how they got there.


It will all work out eventually...as everyone has said principals above personalities, and those should always be AA principals...not our own.Hope everyone has a great sober 24.


(((Hugs)))


GammyRose



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Rick


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Phil and Gammy are right. The old timers around here use to say it's alcohol were here for.


Everything else is an outside issue. Things have changed NA is here. I have a friend who comes to AA because he says it's the same as NA with more people, however he only speaks of his alcohol problem.I like live and let live to some point. I get upset at a certain meeting, there's no group conscience, just a leader who does as he pleases. When a group conscience is called he say's we don't need it.


I let these things chase me out of AA once and it kept me out for 7 years.


I just don't care what other people do.


i know when i'm sober


they can all do there thing and i'll do mine



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