I'd like to read some comments on any spiritual feelings, visions, etc. I've heard many different stories of dreams, visions, voices from beyond, and so on at A.A.meetings. I've never had anything as such, but I'd like to read what others have to say. What did you see or hear? What did it feel like? Or any other description.Thanx!-AlcoHater
For me it's difficult to explain. I feel as though I had somewhat of a spiritual awakening my last night of drinking. Not to sound like a kook, but I truly believe that my HP spoke to me- for a brief moment. Brief, but powerful. It was a 15 second experience of an expression of very simple truth that hit my soul profoundly. I kind of knew when I woke up the next day alive that I would do whatever it took to not drink again- that booze was taking/ had taken my soul. I've had moments of fighting faith since, but I feel as though God is always with me. I talk to my HP as though He's my best friend- my method of communication is pretty casual... It's like He's here with me every moment. Im not necessarily religious, and spent most of my life thus far raging angry at God. In about 15 seconds of pure clarity that simply left me. I couldn't tell you why or how, but I was dangerously close to death- full of an anguished despair. Suicide was my plan. I had bought a dress to be buried in and wrote a letter to my Mom- insane. I came as close as one can to that end without actually following through- I handed it over to God ( not realizing that's what I was doing at the time). I guess He thought it wasn't my time yet. I still have things to do here. I dont speak of spirituality often, but to me it feels like I'm never alone anymore. I feel a connection to others and the world (and myself) that is profoundly different than how I was living before. I was a caged animal- angry, hurt and lashing out at the world. Now I can breath and be free.
-- Edited by Col on Sunday 24th of February 2013 08:49:32 AM
For me spirituality looks like, feels like, is love. Simply being in "the now" is spirituality. Walking in the woods, enjoying spending time with your pet. Now if you'd have asked "what does your relationship with your higher power look like" I think you'd get more answers. I'll save mine for later.
Appendiix II in the book goes into some deatil on spiritual experience/awakening. Some have the bright lights, but for me it was more the educational variety, brought about over a period of time through working the steps and trying to "live" the program. To suggest a spiritual awakening is a change of personality sufficient to bring abour recovery from alcoholism makes sense to me.
But the change I experienced was not brought about by my direct effort. It was something I noticed in hindsight. I began to behave differently, react differently and these changes affected the way I felt about myself and the world. My whole outlook on life changed, peace and joy, a good night's sleep, a clear conscience, an ability to look the world in the eye became a normal state for me.
My faith grew as I progressed and fear left me. The only thing I did was the suggested actions in the steps which for the most part cleared the blockages between me and my higher power. Ultimately the desire/obsession with alcohol was lifted and hasn't returned . I was given the power to stay sober and help others. Essentially that is what AA is all about. In defining the disease the Big Book states lack of power was our dilemna. The solution was to find some power that would solve my problem. Obviously it had to be a power greater than ourselves, and that is exactly what the book and the AA program is about.
Incidentally I have never been religious and infact was quite anti-God when I came in, but I was at least willing to believe that some power greater than me could restore me to sanity. But whether it would or not seemed to depend on the effort I was willing to put in on the steps.
Spirituality is a condition that you come to know, based on things around you that become self-evident, that some power greater than you, is in play with day to day life ... with the way the 'laws of nature' cannot be changed ... Spirituality is when we come to know, believe, and have faith in this 'power' that it is in control rather than us ... you can call it 'a power greater than you', or 'The Force', or 'God', or 'Papa', or whatever makes you feel most comfortable when you talk to this power on a daily basis ... Just know this, you're improved 'conscious contact' is brought on daily by your prayers to this power and is key to opening your mind up to this life giving power ...
I knew nothing of 'spirituality' until I read that book I mentioned earlier, 'The Shack' ... It all just 'clicked' for me then ... it was like 'BAM' ... 'now ya know' ...
And the more I used prayer to communicate with God, the more evident it was that He/She was indeed listening and becoming a more active part of my life ... It was a wonderful thing to experience ... life-saving, in fact ... ... ... Great Question AlcoHater
Love ya man and God Bless, Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
For me it was a building thing. When I started, it was just with enough faith and honesty that I could muster at that point. It was very emotional where I put it out there and had the patience (not much at that time) to wait for results. The results were sort of a Horatio Alger start. In other words, my basic survival needs were covered and a small boundary of inner peace was provided that covered my new "simple" life. (Staying sober and avoiding the "triggers") As I stayed in that fragile, simple world, it began to take hold. As the alcoholic thinking was removed, and in that simple place, I was able to stay in contact with my HP more and more by quiet refection, the relationship and faith in my HP was able to take hold and evolve. Granted, the relationship was tested over the years through my human failings, but this is to be expected, and my HP never left me. It was I who blocked my HP. Luckily for me, the honesty of the program had taken hold. Honesty was simply easier and felt better, and so I could not honestly block my HP for long, and my straying from the path was short lived. Instead of asking "was that a blessing?" which was how the process started, I now smile and give thanks immediately each time a small blessing occurs. I have stated many times here that I think that the hardest part of AA is laying it down to your great "unknown" and asking for "it" to take your problems just for one day, and in exchange you will live that day in the way you HONESTLY perceive that you should. The results are amazing--"spiritual" to be precise. Tom
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"You're in the right place. That's the door right there. Turn around."
For me it's difficult to explain. I feel as though I had somewhat of a spiritual awakening my last night of drinking. Not to sound like a kook, but I truly believe that my HP spoke to me- for a brief moment. Brief, but powerful. It was a 15 second experience of an expression of very simple truth that hit my soul profoundly. I kind of knew when I woke up the next day alive that I would do whatever it took to not drink again- that booze was taking/ had taken my soul. I've had moments of fighting faith since, but I feel as though God is always with me. I talk to my HP as though He's my best friend- my method of communication is pretty casual... It's like He's here with me every moment. Im not necessarily religious, and spent most of my life thus far raging angry at God. In about 15 seconds of pure clarity that simply left me. I couldn't tell you why or how, but I was dangerously close to death- full of an anguished despair. Suicide was my plan. I had bought a dress to be buried in and wrote a letter to my Mom- insane. I came as close as one can to that end without actually following through- I handed it over to God ( not realizing that's what I was doing at the time). I guess He thought it wasn't my time yet. I still have things to do here. I dont speak of spirituality often, but to me it feels like I'm never alone anymore. I feel a connection to others and the world (and myself) that is profoundly different than how I was living before. I was a caged animal- angry, hurt and lashing out at the world. Now I can breath and be free.
-- Edited by Col on Sunday 24th of February 2013 08:49:32 AM
Wow Col,
That was beautiful.
Tom
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"You're in the right place. That's the door right there. Turn around."
My first spiritual feeling in AA happend just shy of 8months when i went out on a two day binge that started with loratabs and ended at the bar blacking out and comming to on my porch. The sherrif was kicking me handing me a restraining order and told me i had ten min to get some things and leave while a tow truck was hooking up the company truck i was bar hoping in. The fear, guilt and shame were through the roof but i was unusualy calm, I knew with out doubt what I needed to do. I walked to the nearest pay phone and called my sponser and told him I was ready to get busy with doing the deal. The next happend a month later when i finnished my fifth step with him. It was two in the morning when we were done. Five hours long. As i went to my car and looked out at the desert sky I saw the depth and enormity of it instead of just a flat sky and felt a total connection with everything. Nothing in a bottle ever came close. Now these days i would have to agree with Dean.
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Since it cost a lot to win, and even more to loose, you and me gotta spend some time just wondering what to choose.
I believe spirituality is something unique to each of us but for me being filled with the spirit of the God of my understanding is simply allowing that Power to guide and care for me rather than yielding to the desires of our own carnal ,human and faltering ways..In other words, it involves for me to know(Step 11 seek thru prayer and meditation) and "grow"(daily application of all Steps,guided by God in all areas of my life) I make a daily and deliberate choice to keep my communication with that Power through confession(Step 10 continuing personal inventory) open and work to not have it be interupted by any self made barriers I may put up between myself and God. It is internal,the joy of love,the beauty of creation around me, it does not rely on some external dogma or set of "rules".When I am able to serve that Power to the best of my ability and also to feel the love of God as I am able to help someone (unseen only between God and myself)and know my spirituality is leading my human nature.To see the light in my granddaughters eyes,to still be able to hear a bird sing or smell the rain coming and feel exhilaration when it would so easy to remain in the dark is the joint for me....As each year passes,I constantly work on stopping to smell the roses and not let the blip of life pass me by,like all things it takes work,but my spirituality increases with each awareness... Awarenesses and awakenings have occurred all through my life, most revered are the ones that have happened on my journey of recovery,recovered one day at a time.....
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
I have been waiting for someone to say that's like asking what is sex like. We can describe it all you want but until you go and try it, you won't have a clue what it's like. If you have decided you want what we have and are willing to go to any lengths to get it, then you are ready to take certain steps.......
In the wake of my spiritual experience there came a vision of a society of alcoholics, each identifying with and transmitting his experience to the next -- chain style. If each sufferer were to carry the news of the scientific hopelessness of alcoholism to each new prospect, he might be able to lay every newcomer wide open to a transforming spiritual experience. This concept proved to be the foundation of such success as Alcoholics Anonymous has since achieved.
Bill Wilson quote
All A.A. progress can be reckoned in terms of just two words: humility and responsibility. Our whole spiritual development can be accurately measured by our degree of adherence to these magnificent standards.
Ever deepening humility, accompanied by an ever greater willingness to accept and to act upon clear-cut obligations--these are truly our touchstones for all growth in the life of the spirit. They hold up to us the very essence of right being and right doing. It is then that we are enabled to find and to do Gods will.
As Bill Sees It: page 271
"Humility is perpetual quietness of heart. It is to have no trouble. It is never to be fretted or vexed, or irritable, to wonder at nothing that is done to me, to feel nothing that is done against me. It is to be at rest when nobody praises me, and when I am blamed or despised. It is to have a blessed home in myself where I can go in and shut the door and kneel to my Father in secret and be at peace, as in a deep sea of calmness, when all around and about is seeming trouble." - Dr. Bob's Prayer
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
hhhmm, what is spirituality like. good question. for me it is having a quality of regard to what my higher power wants as opposed to material or worldly interests.
I love the responses to this question. They are wide and very informative and I can relate. I arrived at my acceptance of spirtuality from lots of locations; at first from the religious angle and then the mental emotional and then I let it go because I was attempting to force a belief on my system and I don't like being forced. I looked at it later kinda sorta like zoomtopz...what I was motivated at and the value of my motivation...If I was positively motivated...my spirit was "up" and the opposide was also true. My spiritual connection with beings on another plane came also from practice and being willing to participate and follow thru on direction from that plane. I was in a motorcycle accident where my ankle was broken and circumstances very scary for me. I spoke my fear out loud and received direction which altered my entire mind, body, spirit and emotional condition. The responses I got from all responders; EMTs, surgeon, anesthesiologist were that something was going on that they could not understand especially from the out comes they witnessed. In the end I had 6 pins and screws in my ankle and the doctor didn't know why I needed it because there was no break and additionally the whoe event was entirely pain free for me. I have had other events which were spiritually unlikely (I was told by others they ought not happen "that" way) and others also experienced the events with me; program people who were very affected by the event, process and outcome. Spirituality for me today is another level I believe we can and do live on when we recognize it, accept it and our own parts in it and then practice it. I believe today that we are more than just "human" beings...I believe that at the same time we are spiritual beings...and have both available to us. "Act as if..." has been a very supportive direction for me. That is the practice of faith and humility and commitment. Works for me. Great step forward Alco...what a growth!!
Thanks for your post! What a wonderful question! I LOVE my moments of synchronistic electricity..basking in the majesty of my Angel, within the 4th Dimension! Ahhh! VERY RARE!!! I LOVE my moments of specific answers, to specific questions from my Angel! RARE!! I think my more common experiences of my Angel...are the moments when I KNOW, God is doing for me, and others, what we could NEVER do for ourselves!!! Staying Sober/drug-free NO MATTER WHAT, facing fears, putting others needs ahead of my wants (aka True Love)...and seeing Gods Fingerprints upon the newcomers!!! YOU...AlcoHater...gave ME God, a few days ago...when I watched you move from angry despair...to SoberPeace.....THAT for me, is tangible Evidence, of the Power of the Angels (cause I feel pretty certain, you didnt do that for yourself ;) ) Thank you! Love, Lady Eli
OK. (To me) it means never being lonely. I can't be. I'm connected to the entire universe. It means being useful and having a purpose even if I don't know what that purpose is. It means being loved and knowing how to love.
It's that and more.
But when I really think of it I always get the thought that it's like a big, warm, soft blanket that I wrap around me on cold nights. I has that constant nice feel to it.
OK. (To me) it means never being lonely. I can't be. I'm connected to the entire universe. It means being useful and having a purpose even if I don't know what that purpose is. It means being loved and knowing how to love.
It's that and more.
But when I really think of it I always get the thought that it's like a big, warm, soft blanket that I wrap around me on cold nights. I has that constant nice feel to it.
How true Frodo ... ... ...
I read somewhere a descrpition of love something like this;
True love is neither physical nor romantic. True love is an acceptance of all that is, of all that has been, of all that will be, of all that will not be
... ... ... - Anonymous
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
