We don't do anything in step three but make a decision...Without action...That's all it is. Notice how they start out step four...
Next we launched out on a course of vigorous action, the first step of which is a personal housecleaning,
The way to work step 3....Is by working steps four through nine. That's where the work is done...And the promises are delivered....I think more people have a problem with step four...Than they do with step three...Step four is where the rubber hits the road...And where honesty is key.
-- Edited by Stepchild on Tuesday 31st of July 2012 09:02:55 AM
I've witnessed so many people stuck on Step Three, trying to "identify" their God/Higher Power as well as trying to figure out how to "turn over their will" that they never proceed to the rest of the Steps and then go out. I recall reading somewhere that we should not get hung up on doing Step Three perfectly, that it is in proceeding quickly to the rest of the steps that we achieve the answers to those very questions by getting the spiritual awakening that we are promised. Does anyone know where this is written? Thank you.
I've witnessed so many people stuck on Step Three, trying to "identify" their God/Higher Power as well as trying to figure out how to "turn over their will" that they never proceed to the rest of the Steps and then go out. I recall reading somewhere that we should not get hung up on doing Step Three perfectly, that it is in proceeding quickly to the rest of the steps that we achieve the answers to those very questions by getting the spiritual awakening that we are promised. Does anyone know where this is written? Thank you.
Have you looked in the 12 & 12? The explanations there are a very important expansion on the steps from the original conceptualizations in the Big Book.
Step 3 is an action step. A crucial one.
Here's an excerpt of what AA published about Step 3 after about 12 years of experience:
In the first two Steps we were engaged in reflection. We saw that we were powerless over alcohol, but we also perceived that faith of some kind, if only in A.A. itself, is possible to anyone. These conclusions did not require action; they required only acceptance.
Like all the remaining Steps, Step Three calls for affirmative action, for it is only by action that we can cut away the self-will which has always blocked the entry of Godor, if you like, a Higher Powerinto our lives. Faith, to be sure, is necessary, but faith alone can avail nothing. We can have faith, yet keep God out of our lives. Therefore our problem now becomes just how and by what specific means shall we be able to let Him in? Step Three represents our first attempt to do this. In fact, the effectiveness of the whole A.A. program will rest upon how well and earnestly we have tried to come to a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
Step 3 is about willingness. And about diminishing self-will. That is difficult to do for many people.
-- Edited by Tanin on Tuesday 31st of July 2012 01:06:12 PM
Right....Willingness to do steps four through nine. Without that...It's nothing.
Steps 4-9 are just Step 3 broken down into bite sized pieces, well, 4-12 actually, 4 get out of my own way, 5 find out what the problem is, 6 become willing, 7 ask for help, 8 take a better look at my part, 9 fix my part, 10 daily inventory, 11 basically pray for guidance, learn to meditate, both od which have measurable health benefits, 12 stay out of my own way and help others, 4-12 IS step three, there is no doing step 3 without doing 4-12, hence the "AA Waltz" we see, 1-2-3 slip, 1-2-3 slip
All of these things together are "turning my will and my life over to the care of God as I come to understand God during this process"
-- Edited by LinBabaAgo-go on Tuesday 31st of July 2012 02:43:34 PM
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Light a man a fire and he's warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
I don't know where it might be written, but it is said that we do the steps to the best of our ability at the time. That, to me, suggests that perfection is not a requirement. I recall the book saying we strive for progress, not perfection.
For me it all gelled on step 3 when I was asked what do i want my higher power to be like. Once II got rid of the notion of God's gonna cut you down and got to God loves me and wants hte best for me, all thoughts of organised religion fell away and I got comfortable with my understanding of my Higher Power.
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It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you got. BB
Next we launched out on a course of vigorous action, the first step of which is a personal housecleaning, which many of us had never attempted. Though our decision was vital and crucial step, it could have little permanent effect unless at once followed by a strenuous effort to face, and to be rid of, the things in ourselves which had been blocking us. Our liquor was but a symptom. So we had to get down to causes and conditions.
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Light a man a fire and he's warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
Re-read page 40 in the 12X12 and it should be very clear as to the meaning of your referenced passage ... In steps 1 thru 3 we Identify that we Have a problem, We realize there is a Solution to this problem, AND then we make a Decision to work the remaining steps to solve this problem ...
I had to re-read page 40 in the 12X12 several times for Me to understand what the heck they were saying ... of course, I'm a little slow ... LOL
God Bless, Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
If you like to listen to speaker tapes, you might want to go to XA speakers.com and search for Joe and Charlie BB tapes. These tapes have been a great supplement to my recovery. I love the way they describe all of the steps, the how and the why of them as they understood them. They especially make sense to me when they talk about step 4, and when it should be taken. They follow that with showing how in doing step 5, we actually get started on 6-8, then that leads to 9, which then leads to 10-12. And it all starts with steps 1, 2 and 3. Funny how that works. As a newcomer, I wanted to go in my order, skipping the steps I didn't like the idea of. The results: I did the "AA Waltz" for a bit, and it was just like Lin describes, 1-2-3 slip, 1-2-3 slip. Not very productive, nor much fun either. Until I got down to steps 4 and beyond, I just danced around AA. . Peace
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I asked God for all things that I may enjoy life. He gave me life so that I may enjoy all things.
Joe and Charlie are great...No doubt about that. I heard a guy in a meeting the other day...He described steps one through three like this....
Step one I have a Power that wants to kill me...(Alcohol) Step two I have a Power that wants to help me... Step three....Which power do I want to choose?
Remember: "Humility and an open mind can lead us to faith and every A.A. meetings is a reassurance that God can restore us to sanity if we rightly relate ourselves to him". Now that's what I call a spiritual awakening. Step three is about willingness, however willing you are.
I have seen people struggle with this for years in AA, and it's a testament to how badly we have watered down the 12 steps and lost the directions our founders left us.
Step 3 is just a "decision" - and nothing more.
It's simply a decision that I am going to live a new way of life even though I have no idea what it will look like or who God is, and I follow up Step 3 by immediately beginning the writing of step 4.
Step 3 is just a decision, and it took as long to do as a decision takes to make.
Down on knees, saying the prayer with sponsor - about 3 minutes total.
Nothing changed. It changed in step 4 - slowly over the writing process of months.
There is only one set of directions for the 12 steps and that is in the Big Book of AA. Only a very experienced sponsor who knows that work could guide me through it and teach me these things.
Though our decision was vital and crucial step, it could have little permanent effect unless at once followed by a strenuous effort to face, and to be rid of, the things in ourselves which had been blocking us. Our liquor was but a symptom. So we had to get down to causes and conditions.
Step 3 is followed up by Step 4 - and that's all we have to focus on now. We never get ahead of where we are. It was in Step 4 that I found God.
Step three is about willingness, however willing you are.
Good post odat....That's how I see it. I once heard Mr. David that step 3 is like signing a contract with your Higher Power to work the rest of the steps....That's simple enough for me.
Not very productive, nor much fun either. Until I got down to steps 4 and beyond, I just danced around AA. 
. Peace