I haven't been to a meeting in 8 days.  My sponsor has been really busy too, so we haven't spoken much. 

I've been alive just about 34 yrs.  8 days isn't that many right?  Feels like a million - I feel totally out of touch other than my daily visits here. 

I was signed up to do chairs at my home group on Monday nights for this month.  My husband couldn't make it home in time for me to be to the meeting, but he arrived in time for me to get there to put away the chairs.  I drove into town, but was a few mintues too late, and they were put away.  My obligations were not lived up to.

My babysitter had been exposed to whooping couch at summer camp... so no noon meetings... Zach working late every night means no evening ones either. 

It's only 8 days, but I've been thinking about drinking lately.  I've been playing with the idea of drinking on my birthday - alone - secretively - how fun right?

Ah - I just looked down at the calendar on my computer and realize it's the 25th.  I have been sober 4 months today!  Jeez.  It's 5:10 pm and I just realized that.

I'm so grateful for this board, but man o man do I need my live program.  Something must change.

I'm positive that your home group will "forgive" you missing an obligation... Life on lifes terms. The best laid plans of mice and men are subject to the whim of god. But look!! 4MONTHS!! congrats!!

You go pappy!! You don't need no stinkin cigarette.. Put the m.f. er out! ( as opposed to let the m.f. Burn...? Ok that wasn't very funny)

justadrunk wrote:

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It's only 8 days, but I've been thinking about drinking lately.  I've been playing with the idea of drinking on my birthday - alone - secretively - how fun right?

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 I understand that things are busy for you and your sponsor...But I would suggest you discuss the importance of getting your fifth step done and moving forward....And to find a way to get to more meetings...At least until you are further along with the steps and your spiritually in a better place...Safe and protected. This is a slippery slope you are walking.

Congrats on the 4 months!! Your right, 8 days is a long time....you know what to do.

StPeteDean wrote:

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The 25th is a great day to have your anniversary.

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I second that Dean. Congrats to both of you by the way. "MIP" just wouldn't be the same without your ongoing support, so thank you again. I guess that leads me into my next topic, gratitude.

I haven't been myself lately, especially after hearing the grim news just 5 days ago. I was told that my first sponsor (Jim) had just died from a massive stroke. He was only 62. That's how my day began, unfortunately. But like I said so many times before: "The death of an alcoholic is never in vain". So instead of sulking over the loss of my dear friend, Jim, I decided to take a different approach instead. I'm going to give back any way I can. So here goes.

Now a little bit about my friend, Jim. He was an avid Golfer and one heck of a cook. I will always remember our first encounter, like it was only yesterday. He said, son -that's how he addressed me by the way- we have some work to do, don't we? Well, guess what, we did. One thing about Jim; he had a kind, gentle spirit that always made sobriety so welcoming, especially for the newcomer. I remember the first remarks he ever gave me: "Don't ever give up". That's how I feel today, just grateful to be alive and sober. I'm grateful for the time he spent 'curing' me over the years, and for his remarkable sense of humility. His spirit will live on in each of us, like he would of wanted. So with the same spirit that exuded that sentiment all so well, gratitude, I now ask you to do the same for the next suffering alcoholic...by giving something back -just like my friends Dean and Tasha do every day. So with that said, I now leave you with a gentle reminder from my good friend Jim: "Don't give up...not now, not ever". And that's all he wrote. R.I.P...

~God Bless~   

I called my sponsor about this last night. We are doing the 5th step at 2pm on Saturday, even if we are puking, with child, or it's the last day on Earth.

I have been contacting people for babysitting now that I know the family I usually rely on has whooping cough going through their family of 8. I may not see them for a year. We were in the 'wait and see' period this past week, but now it's upon them, and we have been exposed as well because we were around them before they got the call that they were exposed. Anyway, yes... I will need to start doing interviews and getting some more back up.

That said, my Mother is coming to help soon, and I don't need to drone on about all the details really. It's just a matter of putting my sobriety first, and moving on. My sponsor said that I'm living life on life's terms, and sometimes things happen - and we need to work with it, and as Mr. David would say - keep the momentum going - no matter what!

I'm so sorry for your loss David - his gentle spirit has lived through you, and those messages you wrote to me in my threads of desperation several months ago, I read over and over with tears pouring down my face. I could feel the care through the words, like gentle arms wrapped around me when I was terribly alone. I'm so grateful for your sponsors and you, and I hope to pay it forward some day.