Comrade, if you feel so inclined and consider yourself an Adult Child, I am asking for you to paticipate in the adult Children forum so as to mature the group.  We have a reoccuring issue with whose recovery efforts are superior.  I think part of the problem is that we are not mature as a group.  Part of the problem is that people, including myself, do not know how to constructively say, I am giving you a boundary smackdown, so back off.  I think that people are afraid to share, leave because of these judgments, and simply do not come back.  I have also observed individual postings and message strings disappearing, which is disturbing.  I understnad that people get giddy when they make recovery progress.  It feels great to be on a positive journey for a change, I look forward to those days myself.

An esteemed member of our group, Jo, posed a question about crosstalk some months ago, and a vigorous discussion ensued about the line.  The group consensus was that some find advice helpful, some don't, and we would each be responsible for communicating what we were seeking and what would be helpful.  Overall, that hasn't worked so well.

I think what we need are people with long-time experience in group dynamics to lead by example so as to model effective means of expressing ourselves and creating a safe healthy environment where people will come back and be helped.

Of course, this is playing out just like my childhood (she observes ironically).  Got a mommy and daddy and the little girl struggling to be safe and comfortable in her own skin with lashing out to enforce boundaries when all other efforts have failed.

I had a bad experience and felt so bad that I binged to the point I threw up.  Noone is responsible for that behavior.  But the words we use have an impact.  I certainly am not going to put myself in an environment that triggers illness in me, let alone an online forum, but I am not ready to bag yet. 

I think of Tipsy McStagger, hope you're doing well, sweetheart, and how the light was on for him for years, for years.  His story and your response to him no matter how aggravating you felt, made me believe I could reach out as an appeal to my Big Brothers and Sisters in recovery to see if y'all could help us.  Thanks. Rachel