Welcome to "MIP". I relapsed so many times myself that it became like second nature to me. The only thing preventing me from slipping even farther was the desire to further my life, not my drinking. I had to put myself in a position where I could finally see some results and "AA" is where that began for me.
The place that so many of us need to come too before we reach the pinnacle of success in life and in recovery is a place of complete surrender, literally. The only way we can re-align our thinking with those of our counterparts in "AA" or recovery in general, is to convince ourselves of something we already know; we can't drink responsibly.
That is the true test when it comes to "remaining" sober; convincing ourselves that "alcohol dependence" has put an unhealthy demand on our lives, period. I would not experience any sort of comfort level within the "AA' program itself, until I released myself from the fatal flaw of "alcohol dependence". That, my friend, is how I came to believe. And I hope that can happen for you as well, starting today.
~God Bless~
-- Edited by Mr_David on Sunday 5th of February 2012 11:35:49 PM
Surprisingly, I did get a bit of fitful sleep last night. I will go to work, then clean the yoga studio, and I guess I should go to a meeting. Funny, today I know the physical stuff, of being shaky and unable to sleep will go away. It is so easy to think going to an AA meeting maybe a bit drastic. I know this simply is untrue. But I am scared of the anonymity thing, I am afraid news will get back to certain people and my career could be jepordized. I live in a big metropolitan area, guess I will a meeting that I won't be recognized at.
-- Edited by littlebit on Monday 6th of February 2012 07:10:20 AM
IDK what you do for a living, and where you attend meetings is your choice. But my fiancee has been in recovery for about 17 years, and he works in community out reach. Several of his superiors are also in recovery (also with lots of time), and also know that he is in recovery. They have their inside jokes during inservices, that no one else really understands, and to my knowlege, in the 17 years he's been in recovery he's never seen one of his bosses at a meeting. just saying.
But also, I work in the health care field, and I'd be absolutely mortified if my superiors found out that I had this disease.
-- Edited by Ruhig on Monday 6th of February 2012 11:32:51 AM
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sober: showing no excessive or extreme qualities of fancy, emotion, or prejudice
But also, I work in the health care field, and I'd be absolutely mortified if my superiors found out that I had this disease.
-- Edited by Ruhig on Monday 6th of February 2012 11:32:51 AM
Lol, keep drinking and they'll find out soon enough Ruhig :) I have a pigeon that's an attorney and he thought that if they knew he had a drinking problem he would be cast out from the Bar association. When he got sober, they sent him a letter thanking him fot not drinking anymore at the Bar association functions lol.. Just thought you may find some humor in his story, I certainly did lol..
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"Never make someone a priority who makes you an option"
24 hours without! Now is always my challenge. I believe the book says something like we have three outcomes- jails, institutions, or death. Unbelievable that I keep hoping for another outcome. I know I will never thrive drinking but then I also doubt that I will thrive sober. But I don't want to cause anymore pain for those I love. Guess I will go clean the yoga studio, take a class and get to a meeting. I am glad the liquor stores close at 8. Just for tonight I will not drink, forever is too long. This morning I was sweating up a storm, jumpy and feeling like my heart was gonna jump out of my chest. I feel better physically, but that is when the peculiar mental twist that parralells my sound reasoning takes over~ best not to think about it too much.
Thank you for the welcomes and the encouragement. I really like this site. I have been listening to some of the speaker tapes. Very good stuff. I have always loved Chuck C's A new Pair of Glasses!
24 hours without! Now is always my challenge. I believe the book says something like we have three outcomes- jails, institutions, or death. Unbelievable that I keep hoping for another outcome. I know I will never thrive drinking but then I also doubt that I will thrive sober. But I don't want to cause anymore pain for those I love. Guess I will go clean the yoga studio, take a class and get to a meeting. I am glad the liquor stores close at 8. Just for tonight I will not drink, forever is too long. This morning I was sweating up a storm, jumpy and feeling like my heart was gonna jump out of my chest. I feel better physically, but that is when the peculiar mental twist that parralells my sound reasoning takes over~ best not to think about it too much. 