My Grandfather was born in Ireland sometime in the late 1890s, were not sure exactly when. He came to America, got a good job, married my Grandmother and then got a promotion at work. The depression hit in 1929 but Grandfather had a career with a large utility in Manhattan.  In 1931 my Dad was born and the family was doing relatively okay up in the Bronx.  Then Grandfathers drinking took off. The details are murky but he drank himself out of the job and then out of the home. Although AA was born in 1935 and the Big Book was published in 1939, AA was not yet so widely known and my Grandfather was eventually found dead in a rooming house in Harlem in 1943. My Dad was 12.

Akin to his father, my Dad liked his drink but was able to establish himself in a job, get married and have children. My brother and I were born within sixteen months of each other across 1960 and 61. My Dads drinking progressed and in 1973, instead of dying in a flophouse, he joined AA and got sober. I was 12.

My Dad is still sober today as are my brother and myself. By the grace of God we stand together as a testament to the success of Alcoholics Anonymous. But looking back across my childhood, I see that my Dad couldnt give what he didnt get. In Dads early years of sobriety my brother and I were invited to anniversary meetings and retreats and such. I remember working the coat checkroom with my brother at one anniversary meeting in the Bronx with well over two hundred people in attendance. Boy did our tip jar do well! Life was good. We went to good schools, moved into a nice apartment in a better neighborhood and both got accepted into a well-known local college. My brother and I were the first generation in our family to get educated. Thank God for A. A.

Through those early teen years I watched my Dad practice a strict adherence to the things he was taught in AA. He made coffee, he sponsored people many of whom I met and got to see their progress first hand. Dad and the men in his home group did everything the Big Book told them to, and they did it with relish. Again, life was good.

            At a young age I saw the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous accomplish much in peoples lives. It was impressive. The program worked and when my time came to ask to for help, I knew exactly where to go.

But now looking back across my seventeen years in the fellowship with three children of my own, I get a gnawing feeling that something is missing. My Dads social life and his interactions with my brother and I centered around A.A. and little else. Again, he followed the Big Book to the letter and today, through my own reliance on the Big Book, Ive found that there is scant little direction in our book regarding the raising of our children. Sure there are pamphlets and the like but if its not in the Big Book, it often doesnt impact our day-to-day operations.
            Bear with me a moment as we take a flier into history. Prohibition was repealed in 1933. Brand name hard liquor replaced moonshine and big time breweries popped up all across America. Though the country was just beginning to claw its way out of the great depression, alcohol caused much destruction. Everyone at the time understood that alcohol was at the root of most social ills. Just the mere fact of prohibition tells us that.  Families were generally intact, government and business embarked upon a maturing relationship that showed promise toward the good of mankind. But alcohol continued to tear away at the fabric of society and the laws of man proved futile against it. Then eighteen months after the twenty-first amendment was passed, A.A. was born. God sure does seem to have a sense of timing.

            Now think about the last forty years and realize that America just doesnt see alcohol like it used to. Witness the change in tolerance for drunk driving. Big name liquor companies are now in the ginger ale business. The evidence mounts; whether its cause, effect or just a contemporaneous coincidence alongside the growth of A. A., the attitude of our culture toward drinking has changed since Alcoholics Anonymous entered its psyche. Did God do for this world what its people, through their governments, could not do for themselves?

So what plagues our society today? There is much evidence that the single most destructive force today is the lack of good, attentive parenting or the breakdown of the family unit. Im sure most of us would agree that beyond sobriety there is no greater responsibility for those of us who are parents than to raise our children well.

While contemplating this, lets go back to the observations of sober men and women paying strict adherence to the program spelled out in the Big Book and yet not fully embracing their role as parents. In the Big Book there is a chapter to the wives, to the employers and, yes, one to the family afterward but there is scant little direction on raising children.

            I would love to continue toward the point of this essay and cause no contention or argument amongst us and I will try, but here goes; Bill didnt have children. Bill and Lois suffered several miscarriages and failed in their attempts at adoption. Dare we believe that it was Gods will for Bill to remain childless? Is it possible that God waited till now that we, the second generation in A. A. have come of age, when the most pressing social ill of the day has become parenting, to bring this to our attention?

            Delving further into our history and effectiveness I observed something that startled me. When brought to the attention of my fellow alcoholics, this has not failed to produce at least wonder especially when seen in the light of the fact that Bill had no children; the Big Book has eleven chapters. There are twelve steps and twelve traditions but the last chapter in the Big Book; A Vision For You. is chapter eleven. Could it be destiny for the Big Book to have twelve chapters?

            To change anything in the first one hundred and sixty four pages of the Big Book would be a terrible mistake. I believe, as many of us do, that it is the inspired word of God.

Is it possible that Our Father would inspire us again with one, final chapter titled; Our Children to follow; To Wives, The Family Afterward, To Employers?

            Please be heard on this. There is a place on the internet where you can vote on it. But please, I beg of you, do not vote either way until you take the twelve minutes necessary to first read the chapter.  www.twelvechapters.webs.com