First of all I am a hypocrite. I tell everyone else how to eat/ train/ be fit. 85% of the time I am sober but I keep having these binges. 2-3 days drunka at a time. Spending 3 weeks in the gym working it off. I have no where to go. Everyday now I wake up with the urge to drink. I must add I drank from sunrise till I passed out for 2 whole years. I got better.... of a little better. I find myself falling back into this situation. I actually got sober completely for 3 years and I found my passion for fitness and helping others. I am on edge to give this up. I cant do it if i'm not good enough to help others.
You know anything about Alcoholics Anonymous?....It's OK if you don't...I didn't know shit about it a little under six months ago. And I haven't had a drink or drug since. And if I keep doing what I learned there...I don't ever have to drink again. Sounds pretty good huh?
-- Edited by Stepchild on Tuesday 6th of December 2011 11:49:14 PM
This will give you a pretty good idea about what alcoholism is..
Read the Doctor's Opinion and Chapter 1, Bill's Story....See if it relates to you at all...This is the Big Book..I read it and thought they wrote it about me.
http://anonpress.org/bb/
-- Edited by Stepchild on Wednesday 7th of December 2011 11:11:43 AM
Alcoholics like myself are not hypocrites. We are just people who are suffering from a serious physical allergy to alcohol, which compels us to drink more than we need. Once the first drink is taken, which we see other people use for social purpose or relaxation, our bodies crave more and more until we reach oblivion.
Knowing this information, the logical thing would be to stop. We do honestly try, but it's impossible because our minds drive us beyond superhuman control to take just one drink. AA's 12 steps if practiced is able to eliminate this mental obsession with alcohol. I have used it for the last 23 years and it works.
Alias - I know several trainers in AA...being in recovery and working an AA program is complimentary to fitness.... I was in a similar situation when I got sober (a therapist/substance abuse counselor with a huge drinking problem). You gotta start somewhere. Now all that AA knowledge and being in recovery is my asset and not a defect. It can be the same for you.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
First of all I am a hypocrite. I tell everyone else how to eat/ train/ be fit. 85% of the time I am sober but I keep having these binges. 2-3 days drunka at a time. Spending 3 weeks in the gym working it off. I have no where to go. Everyday now I wake up with the urge to drink. I must add I drank from sunrise till I passed out for 2 whole years. I got better.... of a little better. I find myself falling back into this situation. I actually got sober completely for 3 years and I found my passion for fitness and helping others. I am on edge to give this up. I cant do it if i'm not good enough to help others.
what should I do? where can i find help?
If you stop drinking a day at a time, you'll be able to help more people in many ways, and they'll need that help.
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"Never make someone a priority who makes you an option"
You're not a hypocrite, you're just like the rest of us...you're two people. There's the dedicated, caring decent you, and the miserable, self-loathing, out of control, drinking you. It sounds like they're both fighting for control. It's up to you to decide who wins.
Your better-self is in my thoughts. I hope he kicks the shit out of that drunk guy :)
