Wow. Just got through an ordeal at work. I am governed by a manual. The manual is very open to interpretation. Insanely, my actual boss does not apply the manual to my work, there are "schedulers" that do it. The schedulers have a supervisor. One of the supervisors blatently imposed a paragraph incorrectly. I very professionally fought the imposition and eventually had to bring in my boss. My boss was called early (6:30am his time, on a Sunday) which pissed him off. I was granted what I wanted, but while I was traveling, the scheduling supervisor got an email to my boss with a false claim (which will be easily proven false because all our conversations are recorded) and so I got an email from my boss that was CCed to a bunch of other department heads claiming he backed the scheduling supervisor--with no input from me. Wow.
I sent a scathing email back--in a reply to all--with all the facts needed to back myself up, and point out the dishonesty of the scheduling supervisor, as well as some tips for leadership for my boss including getting all the facts before assesing blame. Who knows where it will end, but honestly, I do not give a crap. I just thought I would vent it here before I give it to my higher power to solve.
Dear Lord, please accept my prayers not only for my boss, but for the scheduling supervisor. Please take this burden from me. I have truthfully done all I can do in good conscience, and let me release it entirely and press forward with a light heart. I trust in You to lead me down the right path.
Amen
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"You're in the right place. That's the door right there. Turn around."
Nice "TG"...You turned it over, thank God. You made the only decision that makes sense "TG", so be proud of that. You did the right thing regardless of the outcome and that's what matters most of all. That, my friend, is what we in sobriety call "being responsible".
~God bless~
-- Edited by Mr_David on Monday 7th of November 2011 03:32:04 AM
TG, I had a similar situation involving permitting last month between a building official, myself, the City Manager, and my customer Applebees. Lies were told, by the building official, that challenged my intergrity, backs were stabbed in meetings that I wasn't invited to, and a lot of my uncompensated time was wasted. Fortunately I can walk away from any particular customer/situation as I'm self employed and have about 75 customers per year and almost none of them are repeat customers, but Applebees is. The job was put on hold. I did everything that I could do and was never given the opportunity to confront this piece of work. I didn't get any peace until I moved it over to the "things that I cannot change" side of the ledger and asked my HP to take care of the s.o.b.
The business world brings out sides of people that are just horrid. People act worse in the work world than they do in their private lives I think. It would seem that when it comes to getting paid, some just assume it comes at the expense of stepping over others. Work is the one place where you can guarantee that people are really going to have selfish motives and that pretty much everyone else is not working a program. Sometimes it helps me to minimize things and let go by saying "it's just work" even though work is a big part of our lives.
Mark
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
I sent a scathing email back--in a reply to all--with all the facts needed to back myself up, and point out the dishonesty of the scheduling supervisor, as well as some tips for leadership for my boss including getting all the facts before assesing blame. Who knows where it will end, but honestly, I do not give a crap. I just thought I would vent it here before I give it to my higher power to solve.
On man TG, ... You reminded me of having done the same or similar thing like that in my past ... Sorry I have to say I regretted it later, because I wrote my letter and cc'd it to everybody and the sh*t hit the fan ... In the end, it didn't matter that I was right ... What mattered was the SCATHING way I reacted ... I wanted my pound of flesh, period ... I wanted someone to suffer because of their mistake ...
I now make every effort to calm down first before addressing any kind of situation like that (I've written letters that I've 'slepted-on' before forwarding and I've seen the anger with which I replied, and have wound up throwing the original in the trash) ... I know we aren't supposed to be a doormat here and that's not what I'm saying ... It's just that I sensed a calmer approach to this may have been in order thereby removing the anger part from your side of the fence ...
And you're suggestions for how your boss should be doing his job may have been better left for a different time or left unsaid period ...
Just one alcoholic's thoughts (and maybe I don't have or don't get the whole story, it's just how it came across to me!)
God Bless,
Pappy
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
Thanks all. Great stuff. It turns out I was not too scathing compared to the actual facts. Luckly, our company has an Ombudsman program that self polices it self, so when you turn a situation over to them, all involved quickly curb their anger and examine their parts in the play. I am on pretty solid ground, but again, I've given this one to my HP and I can keep it simple, and "just the facts maam". Pappy, you need to stick around. I am not sure how old you are, but my own Pappy would have given the EXACT answer, in the exact way. Of course back then, I had to do the opposite of whatever he said, so now when I hear that voice, I listen. Honestly, this runs right on to Bill's post before this one speaking of forgiveness. In my mind, all are pre forgiven on this situation because I can actually see where their anger comes from. I sure love this forum. Tom
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"You're in the right place. That's the door right there. Turn around."
Tom, ... thanks for the kind words ... It's just I get uncomfortable when I sense someone, especially in our recovery program, maybe making the same mistakes I've made in the past ... I sure am glad you updated us and even more pleased it didn't turn out any worse than it could have been ... for you ... Some of us are still not equiped to handle such situations and once the ball starts rolling, it can be difficult to catch up to it and resolve the problem in an equitable manner ...
We are going to encounter some BS as we go along and the principles of our program have helped me deal with these issues a lot more rationally than I have in the past ... It's not that I'm any more righteous than the next guy, it's just that I use what I've been taught in AA to consider others are sick too and I don't take things too personally anymore ... I've learned the power of asking questions (that I know how others will answer, before I ask) to prove a point ... You know, Sir given the situation, how would you have reacted, or handled it? ... Sir, if you knew the facts and the people involved, what kind of reaction would you have expected? ... You know, Bill, this sort of stuff ... Today I practice excusing myself for a few minutes, take some deep breaths and quickly ask God to help the words coming out of my mouth be the kind He would want to here ... Most of all, I try to conduct my affairs in manner that will not require me to go back and make amends to someone ... I've had my fill of making amends and i'm tired of it, don't like it, and and glad it's over with for today ... I've repeated going through the steps so many times, I feel I got it right this time, cause God allowed me to stay sober for a while and I don't want the 'old me' back one bit ...
How old am I? ..... I feel like I'm older than dirt sometimes ... No really, 59 is what everybody tells me ... (of course if you know who Jack Benny was, he never got above 39, heeeheee)
If what I said before was of any help to you what-so-ever, then my intended purpose was accomplished ... and thanks again for your kind words ... God Bless, Roger (Pythonpappy, Pappy, whatever tickles your fancy)
-- Edited by Pythonpappy on Monday 7th of November 2011 07:52:59 PM
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'
This thread with its responses is how recovery worked for me and for which I have been deeply grateful. I hear the voices of my elders from the past regarding all topics on self responsibility...they are still with me and still abide and support. Tom your's was recovery in action employing all of the tools including empathy, consideration, respect and love for those who were working "their" program as they understand it. My elder sponsor taught me that "pray for them" part also and it took me a while to practice it because of all of the anger, self righteousness, blind ego and pride and then just plain old resistance finally arriving at the program holding me to the responsibility to work well what I had faith and experience in. The program has never failed me...My program has failed me often. I forget where I put it. Thanks for the shares.
Interesting stuff. I don't really understand all the exact roles of everyone on the email, but it seems like the matter has gotten to the ego's before principles phase. I guess we all need to pick the battles we need to try and win. Some my best emails are the ones I never send or respond to.
I always liked the quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson " what you are shouts so loudly in my ears, I cannot hear what you say".
I like the prayer you wrote!
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Rob
"There ain't no Coupe DeVille hiding in the bottom of a Cracker Jack Box."
