I went through the list of past posts and found she has not been on since June 25, but a post from early June says she was having medical issues. And part of that problem if not checked out properly can be life threating.
So, Hope and Pray she is just off getting medical treatment somewhere and will be back as condition allows.
So plenty of Prayers and a Speedy recovery to Just Toni.
Rob Here. Thanks for caring. I'd like to say that I'm doing okay...but I'm not. I've been drinking about every other day "just enough" and yesterday got shitfaced. Wife found me. Can't call sponsor...or anybody else. My phone was in my pocket and she found me trying to climb out of a fishing hole. Almost got a ride to the hospital, but food got my body temp up within a decent range. Now I have to put baby in stroller, and walk to my van. I feel so ashamed. So very, very ashamed. I hope this 24 hours is a successful one. I found a great meeting. A solid meeting that fit me...but it was a smoking meeting and I relapsed with that, too.
I just feel so hopeless. I wanna die, but I won't do that to my family.
That's why I haven't been around. I haven't had the desire to stop drinking.
Rob ,relapse is not the shame,not making it back is.Back to "what your gonna do different this time..When I used to run a 'bad race" or have a bad night playing out with the band,or got my butt kicke din a martial arts tournament,I learned to give myself 10 minutes to "beat myself up' and then get back into whatever my solution would be.No judgement here brother,alcoholics drink and when WE are truly ready,WE don't.but there is work in between.You have 'tasted" what will work,stay in touch,see where the "reservations" started and remember Just For Today YOU DONT HAVE TO DRINK..In support and prayer..Faith ,,being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we have not seen.....We can be prayed over,meditated over, religion,psychiatry,dipped in oil(well maybe not that:) but until it is 'emotional acceptance of utter defeat and surrender moving forward in recovery will remain elusive to say the least..Keep coming back,WE are here for each other no big I's or little U's just one reaching to another in a loving and caring manner. Peace man.........
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
This is where you belong Rob. You have a gift to give and people want you here not just to help you but because you help them. Please take steps to get healthy and do not make yourself into a statistic.
Love,
Mark
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
I did pick up on the fact that when you started the program you were ALL IN! I mean you ended up running a group in a very short time. That surge of energy and then a resultant fall is in our nature! We have a hard time maintaining an even strain. Its all alright as long as it is part of our "learning curve". Keep it simpler than you were. Surrender more. Just make the coffee at the meetings. You are still a success story as long as you are trying. Just like the other guys said, you do have a gift and relapse is not a shame. Just another side note, it seemed like when you posted here regularly, you kept a pretty level head. Try posting more. It worked before!
Peace x 2
Tom
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"You're in the right place. That's the door right there. Turn around."
Thanks Tom, and welcome back Rob, the great thing is we have all the support...anyone of us could pick up that drink but WE together can help each other stay sober one day at a time..
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God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
Hi all, I hadn't been by in here in ages and thought that I'd drop by to say hi and see how everyone's doing. Good to see you here Steve and Aquadude, random though today, I was out cycling and I thought about this board and you...how you're doing. Hang in there bro, you know that this thing works if you keep coming back.
However, getting to end of this thread, I'm gotta say that I'm floored about Just Toni. So very sad and truth be told, I'm going to need t process this. She and I had a nice round of PM's a couple of years back when I was fresh in. Rest in peace, wonderful lady.
