trying to live the sober life...yet one more time...sometimes i think that 'constitutionally incapable' part was added in specifically for me...start at step one i suppose..i am powerless over drugs and alcohol....help me please...
Not all of us get it the 1st time. Myself, I had to go out there for another 3 years and screw everything up before I really knew the 1st step applied to me.
If I had a quarter (Or even a penny) for the amount of times I have heard people with long term sobriety say that they thought the part about being "constitutionally incapable" applied to them.... Now this is people with long term sobriety now. If they could do it so can you. Furthermore, you are back here now and that is proof you are not constitutionally incapable. So I would move past that. A great step comingh here angel...now go to a meeting, get a home group, get a sponsor, work the steps. You can do this. I promise you can cuz I did it and so did everyone else with a bit of time on this board.
The help will be there for you when you do footwork and do the things I said above. Either way, I would love for you to check in here and check in often as long as you have an interest in staying sober, we are here for you.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
thank you everyone..for the kind words and support...i've been at this for 25 years...in and out and in and out...it's like there is some little part of this that i just AM NOT getting...have never been able to make it much longer than a year sober...feel like i am just beating my head against a brick wall....
Not advocating the repeated relapse method....but with no AA, you probably would have drank yourself to death. It has worked some, but not the way you want and not in the manner that produces more permanent long term sobriety.....but there is absolutely no reason that it can't start working that way today...and tomorrow....and the next day....(one day at a time as you know).
-- Edited by pinkchip on Thursday 15th of September 2011 08:33:41 PM
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
Aloha Magic...Its only a daily trip. When I get to my pillows at night I express gratitude and in the morning I know that I only have to duplicate the day before. Keeping in mind how cunning, powerful and baffling the disease is helps me stay alert. Knowing that I willl not do it alone is gratifying.
Maybe you're not a newbie. It hasn't changed since you went back out. Duplicate it with the exception of picking up.
There's a thousand reasons for me to drink again. A thousand reasons to quit going to meetings and a thousand reasons to stop working a program. There's only ONE thing I need to do for everything else to work ... don't pick up the 1st drink.
If I remember, every morning when I say my prayers that if I pick up a drink, Im gonna die, it really sorta helps me to stay sober for that day.
If I remember my last drunk, every morning when Im asking God to keep me sober for that day, it really sorta helps me to stay sober for that day.
If I remember all the pain, suffering, misery , anger, and hate I always felt toward others and myself, it really sorta helps me to stay sober for that day.
If I remember every morning when Im praying to be thankful for this new sober life I have, and remember to thank God at night for another sober day before I go to bed, then I know that I never was nor do I ever have to be worried about being incapable of realizing and recognizing just how truely blessed I am to be alive.
I love that post happycamper. It did not occur to me when I started this journey that one day (even at just 3 years) I would feel so distant from that last drink...It literally feels like forever since I had a drink but when I think like you just described, it stops my "forgetter" from taking over and from me getting even closer to the next drink.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
I know the feeling feel like a idiot so many people get it why am i so different? they say its a simple programme why am i not sober then first time ive ever wrote on here so dont know if im doing it right
hey spink...you are doing it exactly right...several years ago i had some very good, almost long-term (18 months) sobriety...i felt very good about myself..and the program i was working...i was quite young..early 20s...eventually, it hurt too much to be sober...drinking became my friend again...have never been able to get that feeling back...nor have i been able to acquire sobriety even remotely that long...believe it or not, i have managed to further my education and become a somewhat productive member of society...i recently became a certified EMT in my hometown...thank you carlasober..dean..pinkchip..and all the others...one of the most wonderful things of AA is always being welcome...no matter how goofy we are and how many times it takes us to come back....
Magic, a couple years ago an emt go busted for drunk driving the ambulance, after hitting an oak tree on a curve in the road. He did some serious jail time and career over. It was on CNN.
Not all of us get it the 1st time. Myself, I had to go out there for another 3 years and screw everything up before I really knew the 1st step applied to me.
Welcome back.
Amen...you're one step away from becoming the next miracle. So, stay the course.
