All: I just wanted to share a teeny bit here tonight. I was feeling lower than whale doodoo tonight for some reason. Not really sure, but all day today, I've been in a funk. I feel like if I tried to explain why I am feeling so low that I will start crying. My high school reunion is this Friday through Sunday. I'm leaving with my friend and her husband on Friday morning for the 5 hour drive to our destination. For the past 3 months, we've been talking about this reunion, I've been shopping for new clothes, had a new hairstyle/color, etc.... Now that it's only a couple of days away, I am wishing it was over. I normally don't have these kinds of depressions anymore, but today has been horrible.
I was fixing to just call it a day, but decided I'd log in here and read up. After just a few minutes of reading some of today's posts, and going over some from the last couple of days (especially some of the daily reflections that are posted) I'm happy to report that I feel much better! I have been looking forward to this reunion and forgot to stay grounded into 'today' I am ALWAYS preaching One Day at a Time and I forgot to do that! I also lost sight of what is really important (sobriety) so thank you all. You helped me and you didn't even know it.
I haven't been to any of my high school reunions, even though it does sound like fun. We're glad you're feeling better and hope you return soon with some interesting stories to tell. We will be waiting...So, enjoy the reunion, just without the drinking of course.
~God bless~
-- Edited by Mr_David on Thursday 16th of June 2011 12:47:01 AM
I truly believe pain shared is pain lessened,when we can get out of that "vast universe between our ears" and take time for some reflection,our gratitude for another day of life "free from active addiction really shines bright! God is humorous,as one who really 'works" to stay in the day,for the last almost 33 years I have been a production manager in a facility for people with disabilities.Schedules,planning ahead,deadlines ,all a major part of my job.....My spiritual writings tell me" that I can always plan for tomorrow but not at the wasted expense of today!!Just For Today I will live like yesterday is gone,I am not promised tomorrow so this is the day to be of maximum service to God and to do my best to help others...Thank you for sharing this morning,have a blessed and productive day!!
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
David and MikeF: Thank you both for the es&h! I normally don't bitch about whatever is going on in my life because after so many years of utilizing the tools of our program, it's just hard to justify not being in the 'now' and knowing what to do. Maybe living the steps and the program have permitted my huge ego to fess up when things aren't going good and to let go of expectations on where someone with over 23 years sober should be. Okay, I admitted it!! I'm not perfect and I don't always have a handle on my emotions/feelings. That feels better to let go of that big rock! Thanks again and God Bless you both. I'll post when I get back and thanks again!
Sober...often times the fartherest I want to look back to is when I got into recovery. When I look before that and what I did to my life and the lives of others I also make a trip to the blue room...depression...anger turned inward, remorse, regret and resentments...another set of 3r's. What you are today, this moment is a sober member of Alcoholics Anonymoust thanks to the Grace of God and it doesn't get any better than this. Thanks for the short note. (((((hugs)))))
Thank you, Jerry for the reminder -- that hit home! I wouldn't want to go back to the 70's, really... still amazed at what this program has provided and the opportunites I've had as the result of being sober and doing a few simple things. Life is good and the friends we have in AA, all over the world, is just short of amazing! Thank you all for taking the time to share your es&h with me. I'm pumped up about the reunion, but in a good, sober, and realistic way. Not like in the old days where I would have stayed drink throughout the whole thing and wouldn't have remembered any of it! I would have also made a complete ass out of myself and more than likely would have told a few of those cheerleaders what i really thought about them. Thank God I can just go down there and be one of the bunch, and perhaps even enjoy it! I'll be thnking of you all and will pop in on Sunday and let you know how it went. (for those of you who may care! LOL)
