I am 18 years old. I am an only child. My mom drank when I was a little kid, but I didn't know. Then she got help(voluntarily on her own) and quit(possibly I'm unsure if this is true). When I was about 8 years old she got in a relationship with a drinker and started drinking again(or she may have never stopped). She has not stopped. She is still with the guy she got into a relationship with when I was 8. I love him(I consider him my dad) and my mom. They are my family. The fact that they both drink has affected me since I was 8(but at this age i didn't realize it yet I don't think but as I got older I realized it), but my mom's drinking has affected me worse, since she drinks more than my dad(in my opinion). I was wondering if there's anyone here who can help me understand why my mom chose to get help before when I didn't know or understand anything but now that I do she won't; and help me figure out how to cope w/her drinking.
Hi Lanchas. Alcoholism is a addiction and a disease buddy. To get a better understanding for yourself--they have groups called Alateen, and Alanon. --for families and freinds, such as yourself, and they are support groups. Any around where you are? Alanon phone number should be in the phone book also. Give it a try. Let us know how you make out.
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Easy Does it..Keep It Simple..Let Go and Let God..
I think Phil pretty much said it all. The only thing I would add is that the disease of alcoholism is very confusing and powerful. There probably is no exact answer to your question. Your mom probably doesn't know why herself.
Take Phil's suggestion and call Alanon or Alateen, they can help you.
Hugs,
Doll
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* We eventually realize that just as the pains of alcoholism had to come before sobriety, emotional turmoil comes before serenity. *
Alcoholism is a progressive disease. We can never be cured of the disease. If we stop for a period of time and then start drinking again, we are soon back to where we left off and then continue to worsen. Quite possibly, when your mom stopped before, she was still able to control her intake somewhat, but has gotten now to the point that she cannot stop, whether she want to or not. It has nothing to do with you and how you feel about it. As a mother of 4, I knew how my kids wanted me to stop, I knew I was hurting them everytime I made the promise and broke it, yet I couldn't stay away from it. I hurt my children terribly and can only now try to make it right with them.
The best thing you can do right now is to educate yourself on the disease of alcoholism and learn how to cope with living with an alcoholic. You can begin to heal yourself by contacting alalnon and alateen and asking them for help. I pray that you will.
