Clean house means keep your side of the street clean ... no resentments, no grudges, no judgements, no critisism's, no jealousies, no anger, and the like.
I know for me when my real house is clean, it makes me feel good.
Cleaning my house as far as my brain and insides go is the same. I stay free from hatred and bad thoughts.
It can also mean treating myself good ... drinking lots of water, eating the right foods, getting the right kind of exercise.
I have an AA Friend sober 29 yrs and since the very first day I met him over 6 yrs ago, he has always said that this program of AA can be boiled down into 6 simple words:
What you wrote the other day, I wanted so much to respond, but I was down and out with a nasty flu.
I noticed that you said you had never done a 4th Step, after several years of relapsing, I shared that with you, Step l,2, 3, drink.that was my little dance for about 7 years.....it had to do with my own inability or refusal to bring up what I was going to take the grave with me....
So with this question on what does Clean House mean, well for me it involved a deep, deep rather gut wrenching 4th Step, (say for example you were to to do a throuough real houseclean in a house that had not been deep cleaned for many many years, the 4th Step is bringing everything out on to the floor, (putting everything you pulled out and then the Critical (Cleaning part is Step 5, sharing this all with your Sponsor) it does not have to be with your Sponsor, as the BB points out, it can be with a Professional or clergy, but I have to tell you Steve, when I was done with airing my stuff in my 5th Step, I could feel an internal change, I chose to do this 5th Step with an AA Counselor, and just to add, that he shared some of his 4th step with me....so Cleaning House was what I finally was willing to do with the surrendering of my own tenancious will to HIS Will.
the following Steps are definitely as important, my own experience anyway....
Just a few comments on your words from last weeks point of chronic relapsing, you said you were in the middle of one, and my thinking when I read that, was, well only if you choose to be, and the last one, dying a miserable old man........I will leave my comments out, but you figure that one out..
So happy to see you here working toward a Sober life, it is so worth the work, you life will change in ways you never dreamed possible....
Lots of Love to you my brother.
Toncakes
Hi Again Steve, had to come back today and finish my thoughts on Cleaning House, just for me, Step 6 and & 7 with my Sponsor, learning how to work with Prayer and asking God to make clear the error of my ways and out in the open, with rigerous honesty, Step 8, making a list of people that I had harmed, and Step 9, ( can take a long time.) be patient with this one, and Step 10, daily inventory of where I might have made an error, get out the broom, written or verbal of cleaning up my side of the street, before going to sleep that night..... Just my 2 cents on the subject, but it was those secrets that were keeping me down and out, til the out was getting closer and closer......I did not have a clue about the Progression of this Disease until it got me and held me down for a long long time. Only by the Sheer Grace of GOD, did I make it back to the rooms of AA as a permanent figure....went to a meeting almost everyday for the first 10 years, and living proof that the 12 Steps are the way up and out of this killer Disease....
Praying for you, my friend you stay, get right in the middle of the boat, and hold on tight, and you are going to be safe and sober.
hugs, Toni
-- Edited by Just Toni on Tuesday 18th of January 2011 12:17:29 PM
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