Wanting peace of mind...

PEANUT · Member

Wanting peace of mind...

Phil · MIP Old Timer

Takes a while to slow the old mind train down, some days our freind.:)

Sponsors? I have 3 full time sponsors. More like close freinds, than anything else. But whom I can totally confide in about anything. I dont get different opinions from them. But am usually directed to some part of the program, if I need suggestions on something.

A lot of other freinds in AA become sponsors to some degree, and we are all there for each other.

We share our experience strength and hope with each other, as you are doing here with us.

The more meetings I go to, the slower the train, and the better I feel. And its all a WE THING.

Surrender, and powerlessness, and acceptance are biggys--one day at a time>:)

And we dont get it all by last Thursday.

Hang tough our freind--one thing at a time-one day at a time-in slow mode:) SOBER.

Doll · MIP Old Timer

Hey Peanut.

I know exactly what you mean..... My honey calls it "brain drain" (don't ask!! ) I can go from 0 to 90 in .4 seconds and stay around 90-95 for days, and don't seem to accomplish a dang thing. Then I crash. Don't want to do anything but nap for a couple days! Makes life hard some days, but i'm told it's natural to us newbies and it WILL slow down.

Check out the PAW website http://www.tlctx.com/ar_pages/paw_part1.htm

It has helped me alot. Has some good information.

Get as many sponsors as you think you need......... my home group passes out phone numbers so we can call any AAer anytime we need to. I have a few that are "friends" that I tend to lean on more than others.......whatever it takes for ya........

Keep the faith. It get's better...........

Much love

Doll

cheri · Senior Member

Definitely you should be getting phone numbers and making friends with people in recovery. You should go for coffee and hang out with these people. Get in the middle of the herd. It not only helps you stay sober, it helps the people around you.

But 2 sponsors? A sponsor is the one who is going to work you through the steps. S/He will tell you how they got sober, and should be the person that calls you on your BS. A sponsor will give you unconditional love, but hold you accountable for your actions. A sponsor is the one you talk to about the things that you can't share about in meetings, but they won't judge you, they help you find the solutions to the things going on in your life.

Sometimes, in early(or not so early) sobriety, we look for the easier, softer way. If we ask enough people, we are going to hear what we want to hear eventually. A sponsor will tell the truth, even if we don't want to hear it. So having more than one sponsor would be dangerous for me. If I didn't like what one said, I'd just go to the other.

If your sponsor doesn't have the time to sponsor you(and you should ask them directly), then you should look for one that does. But if your sponsor is doing what they have committed to do, then one should be more than enough for you.

Love, cheri

Doll · MIP Old Timer

Let me add this. I agree with Cheri on the number of "actual sponsors", the one that walks you thru the steps. I meant the "sponsors" as Phil put are great, Friends in Sobriety. In my AA we all "sponsor" each other. I can bounce stuff off of some of them or just chat when I need to, and they're always supportive. But there is only one to walk with me thru my 12 Steps.

Cheri's right (and she knows what she's talking about).

Much love

Doll

Bobby Dean · Veteran Member

I'd take a hundred sponsors if I needed them, currently I have one main sponsor. notice I said sponsor not babysitter, all to often we tend to expect our sponsors to get sober for us, this is not a sponsors commitment to us. My sponsor who I seek experience strength and hope from leads by example, a lot of times when when I was a newcomer I would struggle with answers. he explained to me that I needed the experience of searching out these answers for myself. ever watchful he would watch me struggle and only relate to me his approach and tell me I had to find my own way to work and accept things that were happening. Today after 10 years I still have the same sponsor and I tell him often how much I appreciate him making me work for my Sobriety, and today I have the honor of sharing my own ESH and how I went about searching for a way to stay sober through the program of AA.

but to answer how many sponsors, I have one main sponsor and a little black book with about 50 names and telephone numbers, and I am comfortable in my belief that if I need some ESH and my main sponsor is unavailable, I can call any one of those 50 people and one of those folks will have the answer I need.

Love, Bobby Dean.

GammyRose · MIP Old Timer

Hey Peanut, Everyone has shared great stuff. I just ran into the AA pamplet on Sponorship the other day as I was packing, so I took it to my Mom's last night and read it. It helps me to read AA literature,ocassionally, just to refresh my memory. If you have one of these I would suggest you read it again, if you don't have one maybe you can pick one up at a meeting. If they don't have any , find out where you closest place to get literature is. If all else fails you can order one from WSO.

I have had a few sponsors at once, I don't have one at all right now, but I can call any one, anytime in my group, if I need too.Just as long as you have another recoverering Alcoholic to talk to , hang with( preferable someone with at least a year of sobriety) and work on the steps with, along with meetings, meetings, and more meetings, you will be ok.

I left the pamplet at my Mom's, if I had it here I would share some of it. I will be so glad when I have all of me in one place.

Have a great sober day and call someone.

((((Hugs)))

GammyRose

PEANUT · Member

thank you all for the help. And I ahve been calling my list. People I know are hard to get a hold of, so I made it a priority to go to more meetings this week to meet more people in sobriety. My sponsor now is a teacher, so she is going to be extremely busy during the course of the next few months... so yes I will confide in others in the program.

I do like looking at having a friend(s), rather than a sponsor it makes me more at ease. Though i know it will take time to find one. But while I am looking, I will keep going to meetings and chatting with you all here.

Thanks!

Peanut