Drunk, angry, and trying to sneak into the Mullet Festival without paying is no way to go through life, son.

AmyWillWin · Veteran Member

Drunk, angry, and trying to sneak into the Mullet Festival without paying is no way to go through life, son.

Posey · Veteran Member

Aw Amy, you're gonna do really well! You should've given the girl a hug anyway---I think it would mean even more coming from someone who is new to sobriety. At my meeting yesterday, the woman who offered to sponsor me said that in her first few meetings all she did was cry. She was shocked at how much laughter she found in the meetings & thought "these people are nuts." You're right about humor, it's good medicine. Girl, you are gonna make a fabulous sponsor someday!

AmyWillWin · Veteran Member

I wish I had given her a hug! I still feel a bit like a babe in the woods at meetings, although I don't (I'm gonna shock everyone now) have a problem talking. Most everyone there has so much more experience at this sobriety thing than I do. Thanks for the kind words, I hope to someday help someone as much as everyone's helped me. biggrin

-- Edited by AmyWillWin on Thursday 21st of October 2010 02:15:56 PM

Jerry F · MIP Old Timer

Keep on keeping on Amy...In time we learn more. I never laughed when I first got
here cause nothing was funny to this victim of alcohol. My life was a mess and I had
not yet figured out what drinking had to do with it so it was everyone elses fault and
just had to be because I sure wasn't thinking I had anything to do with it having only
lived as I was led to believe was best...with alcohol. Yes I was born and raised with
in the disease.

Those I had hurt had nothing to laugh about either, especially those I had hurt
because I found out, I left them with the pain and angst that they had something
to do with it, had caused it outright. Making my amends freed up alot of my victims
from the thought that they must have been responsible for what had happened in
those events. A great part of their pain was in those unexplained events.

I laugh most when I mistake and don't victimize others with it.

((((hugs)))) smile

-- Edited by Jerry F on Thursday 21st of October 2010 02:28:44 PM

AmyWillWin · Veteran Member

Jerry, I find absolutely zilch funny about anything that causes another pain: I was talking about my own ridiculous & asinine behavior. At my first step meeting one of the women was telling her story and she said "I fell down a lot" and someone else said "Me too!" and we all laughed. What you can find humor in, you should. It heals. That's what I'm talking about here, although it is safe to say I may have a little bit of a warped sense of humor to mock myself for falling and giving myself a black eye and not remembering any of it. Hah.

Aquaman · MIP Old Timer

Laughter is awesome and Steve Martin was spot-on when he said "comedy is not pretty."

Laughter is pain. Every joke of every type has a victim, a patsy, a dupe. Someone who falls for the "knock-knock", a Stooge who falls down and in the best cases...ourselves & our perceptions.

Does everyone have a different "line"? Yup. That line is usually established via empathy, sympathy or morality. Either way...it's subjective.

I have yet to hear a telling of The Aristocrats that I had to shut out. I have a pretty distant "line".

When I play with humor I must remember that I am responsible for my intent and my words. If I choose to, I will empathize with the listener and try to stay back from their line.
In the end, the listener is responsible for their own perceptions...not me.

If something offends me it's because I chose to be offended.

Peace,
Rob

LinBaba · MIP Old Timer

I like what The Big Book has to say about Humor:

the drinking career of almost every alcoholic has been marked by escapades, funny, humiliating, shameful or tragic. The first impulse will be to bury these skeletons in a dark closet and padlock the door. The family may be possessed by the idea that future happiness can be based only upon forgetfulness of the past. We think that such a view is self-centered and in direct conflict with the new way of living.

Henry Ford once made a wise remark to the effect that experience is the thing of supreme value is life. That is true only if one is willing to turn the past to good account. We grow by our willingness to face and rectify errors and convert them into assets. The alcoholic's past thus becomes the principal asset

This painful past may be of infinite value to other families still struggling with their problem. We think each family which has been relieved owes something to those who have not, and when the occasion requires, each member of it should be only too willing to bring former mistakes, no matter how grievous, out of their hiding places. Showing others who suffer how we were given help is the very thing which makes life seem so worth while to us now. Cling to the thought that, in God's hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have -- the key to life and happiness for others. With it you can avert death and misery for them.

We have been speaking to you of serious, sometimes tragic things. We have been dealing with alcohol in its worst aspect. But we aren't a glum lot. If newcomers could see no joy or fun in our existence, they wouldn't want it. We absolutely insist on enjoying life. We try not to indulge in cynicism over the state of the nations, nor do we carry the world's troubles on our shoulders. When we see a man sinking into the mire that is alcoholism, we give him first aid and place what we have at his disposal. For his sake, we do recount and almost relive the horrors of our past. But those of us who have tried to shoulder the entire burden and trouble of others find we are soon overcome by them.

So we think cheerfulness and laughter make for usefulness. Outsiders are sometimes shocked when we bust into merriment over a seemingly tragic experience out of the past. But why shouldn't we laugh? We have recovered, and have been given the power to help others.

We do try to stick to our own stories, but if something is in the paper it's fair game IMO

We families of Alcoholics Anonymous keep few skeletons in the closet. Everyone knows about the others' alcoholic troubles. This is a condition which, in ordinary life, would produce untold grief; there might be scandalous gossip, laughter at the expense of other people, and a tendency to take advantage of intimate information. Among us, these are rare occurrences. We do talk about each other a great deal, but we almost invariably temper such talk by a spirit of love and tolerance.
Another principle we observe carefully is that we do not relate intimate experiences of another person unless we are sure he would approve. We find it better, when possible, to stick to our own stories. A man may criticize to laugh at himself and it will affect others favorably, but criticism or ridicule coming from another often produce the contrary effect. Members of a family should watch such matters carefully, for one careless, inconsiderate remark has been known to raise the very devil. We alcoholics are sensitive people. It takes some of us a long time to outgrow that serious handicap.

My Favorite story about this was from a friend named Jim, who took his mother to a meeting, and the Speaker was talking about his bottom, he was locked in a hotel room and was going to end it all, he put a gun to his head, pulled the trigger

-click-

He pulled the trigger a few more times

-click click-

In Rage and despair he threw the gun across the room and it went off hitting him in the leg and he had to call 911

The room was ROARING, completely laughing, Jim's mother looked at him and asked "what is WRONG with you people???"

After the meeting Jim had to explain it was because we had all been there, we all knew the rage and despair of the end, but we were recovered, we were on a new footing and had a new life

That's the funny thing about meetings, we laugh when everyone else cries, and we cry when everyone else is laughing

(in a voice of total surprise after being caught drunk with the sexy stewardess from the planet playtex) "Then my wife left me" -The room is rolling on the floor laughing-

"Then my child hugged me" -not a dry eye in the house-

Amy, I leave you last with some of the most Sage advice I ever got from a man who got sober in World War II

"It's better to give a resentment then get one"

We are all responsible for our own perceptions, and if I get a resentment, it's my responsibility, I refer you to Larry's Post today

In Sobriety we learn an appropriate sense of ownership"

AmyWillWin · Veteran Member

LinBaba wrote:

In Rage and despair he threw the gun across the room and it went off hitting him in the leg and he had to call 911

The room was ROARING, completely laughing, Jim's mother looked at him and asked "what is WRONG with you people???"

After the meeting Jim had to explain it was because we had all been there, we all knew the rage and despair of the end, but we were recovered, we were on a new footing and had a new life

I love this story. I'd have been in tears from laughing so hard. I just can't "Poor Amy" myself any more. That kind of thinking is what got me here.

LinBaba · MIP Old Timer

AmyWillWin wrote:

LinBaba wrote:

In Rage and despair he threw the gun across the room and it went off hitting him in the leg and he had to call 911

The room was ROARING, completely laughing, Jim's mother looked at him and asked "what is WRONG with you people???"

After the meeting Jim had to explain it was because we had all been there, we all knew the rage and despair of the end, but we were recovered, we were on a new footing and had a new life

I love this story. I'd have been in tears from laughing so hard. I just can't "Poor Amy" myself any more. That kind of thinking is what got me here.

poor me, poor me, pour me another drink

is how that litany goes

good girl