my husband still drinks. he used to be a very heavy drinker when i met him, so we drank a lot. it appears he is not an alcoholic . he thinks my being an alcoholic is a 'weakness' not a disease. Anyway, i can barely stand the smell of beer on his breath. it is such a horrible smell now... and also, my nose can smell it on anyone. it is so hard to believe i thought no one would notice if i had been drinking.... i did get a lot of funny looks from clerks at stores, and now i know why... i am so thankful my HP has shown me a different way to live. love to you, all. Thanks for being here. jj
Hi jj! Yes I am fortunate ,my wife rarely drinks,but your right on certain occasions I can pick up the scent a mile away>(glass of wine,mixed drink) I was told that alcohol was wreaking from my pores when I was active and also used to think, they'll never know here or there that I been drinking!! How we can rationalize our denial huh!! Yes love right back at you, by the grace of God,sober for another day!
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
JJ, Feel for you. I'm lucky...I'm the drunk, not my wife. She recently asked me...several times for confirmation...if it was finally okay for her to have a 6 pack of "beer-snob" beer for her and her friend. I said "no problem, just PLEASE keep it in the six-holder so that I know it's accounted for and if you get drunk & horny...you're on your own.
Hi jj....I have a nose like a hound. When I first started to go to AA meetings I use to sit next to a lady who reeked of alcohol. I thought it was all in my mind because who in the world would drink and come to a meeting??? Well, nothing wrong with my nose she was drinking Vodka and thought know one would know. She would share and make no sence. lol Well she is doing much better these days which is good. My boyfriend quit drinking right along with me and I am so grateful. Not sure I would have given this program a chance like I did if had continued to drink. My HP set me up t o succeed and for that I am truly grateful!!
Aloha JJ...and here in is just one part of the change. When I broke away from my drinking friends, family and associates I also could tell, feel, think, imagine and notice the difference because lots of stuff in me cleaned up when I got alcohol free. Some of my old drinking group got angry that I wouldn't drink anymore with them or anyone else and I was already taught to expect it. I no longer live with an alcoholic so that odor doesn't come into my home anymore. I no longer have to try to communicate with one either and I don't have to listen to the babble I use to speak in my self. I don't have to deal with the "its a weakness" critique and one reason is that some of those preachers have passed using the river of denial and booze. By the way it is a weakness because alcohol and alcoholism can pretty much take the strength out of any mind, body, spirit and emotions. Your husband has got to "keep face" or he might find he needs to investigate what you know and have found. Of course I use to look at it that way also until I started peeking at the information. Come to find out I knew nothing and didn't even know that I knew nothing.
Put some vicks under your noses or carry a sweet smelling flower around with you when the other guys are in your space. ((((hugs))))
When I was a little over a year sober, I ended up chairing a big clubhouse meeting that was usually packed. It was a fun meeting but we got some interesting walk-ins. This time, a guy came in and sat in the front row. A bit disheveled but I've seen people with 20 years or more sober look disheveled, sometimes all I need is a mirror... LOL. Anyway, when I asked for anniversarys, he sticks his hand up and says "I got two weeks today". Everyone applauded before I could ask him two weeks of what, supply of vodka? He was maybe 6 feet in front of me and a foot below the podium but as soon as he opened his mouth, I could smell his breath.
Well of course nobody said a thing, unfortunately when it was time to ask for a discussion topic... yep, same guy. He rambled for about 5 minutes about his father and finally shut up. I made a topic out of it and we proceeded to have a normal AA meeting.
I learned from that experience because even though I was the one running the meeting, most people who listened to him or were close to him knew he was drunk. Nobody said a thing. So, unless a wet drunk is being extremely disruptive - well beyond breath and a vague topic - we let it go.
my husband still drinks. he used to be a very heavy drinker when i met him, so we drank a lot. it appears he is not an alcoholic . he thinks my being an alcoholic is a 'weakness' not a disease. Anyway, i can barely stand the smell of beer on his breath. it is such a horrible smell now... and also, my nose can smell it on anyone. it is so hard to believe i thought no one would notice if i had been drinking.... i did get a lot of funny looks from clerks at stores, and now i know why... i am so thankful my HP has shown me a different way to live. love to you, all. Thanks for being here. jj
Hmmm well if it's not a disease, at the very least it has been classified as a disability by the ADA in the U.S. You might wanna point that out to your husband, maybe he'll be a little more understanding. Maybe. Good luck!
Every so often, I'll get into the elevator at work and smell it--the smell of booze that was left by SOMEBODY who is no longer on the elevator. It makes me worry that the next person who gets on will think it is ME reeking. LOL, same thing that makes me paranoid when I see a police car behind me, even when I know I'm not doing anything wrong.
I got expert at detecting the smell when I was living with an alcoholic who was trying to pretend he was sober. I still have flashbacks, a feeling of anxiety that I associate with that.
I don't like to think about how I must have reeked the last several years of my own drinking. Yuck.
OH yeah, we can smell it seems like a mile away ,lol.
I remember being drunk one particular night and walking into a party store to buy some beer and I set the 6 pack on the counter and the clerk said " Im not selling that to you ". I just left and walked out of the store, lol. Apparently I must have not onlly smelled drunk, I looked it too. Of course I didnt think I did, I figured it was normal to be plastered at 1am and be out and about looking for more booze.
jj ... my husband and I were drinking partners. When I stopped, he told me I wasnt an alcoholic, he said I just liked to party to much, lolol. First couple of years , he continued to drink altho not heavily. And of course I just KNEW he was an alcoholic cuz I was, lol. I came to believe after a couple years that he wasnt alcoholic.
And today, he rarely drinks at all. One things for sure tho, if he has been drinking, I can tell just exactly how many beers he has had. And ... he knows that I know too
Oh gosh, can I relate.... smells to me like rotten old fruit... nasty... and it is being exhaled, one way the body removes it from the system... I was watching Intervention a while back and noticed the pallor of the people there who were active in their drinking... pastey and sweaty and whitish-grayish yellow... greasy looking...
How did I ever think I was the "Belle of the Bar" (see BB story) when that was the reality of it??
thank God for AA and a Solution....
I am glad YOU are sober, jj, regardless of what you now have to deal with...
(((((hugs)))))
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
