Your first AA meeting

KPie · Member

Your first AA meeting

Larry_H · MIP Old Timer

I found this on wikiHow "How to get through your first Alcoholics Anonymous Meeting"

Larry,
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I go to meetings to hear voices other than my own

How to get through your first Alcoholics Anonymous Meeting

originated by:Ljp26, Maluniu

Nobody wants to go to their first Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) meeting. Everyone is afraid. AA welcomes everyone, and you don't need to meet any requirements. If you've ever thought of going, or have been told you must go, here's what to do.

1 Find a meeting. There are lots of sources. Call the nearest Alcoholics Anonymous Intergroup office, visit http://www.aa.org, ask a church pastor or anyone you might know in recovery. Many cities have hundreds, or even over a thousand AA meetings each week.

2 Pick a compatible meeting. If you're going because you are curious about AA, go to an "open" meeting, which is for anyone. Closed meetings are only for people who have decided they have a problem with alcohol and want to stop drinking. Some meetings are for men only or women only, are foreign language speaking or are for other special groups. The sources above can guide you to the right meeting.

3 Ask for a ride if you don't have a way to get there. The local AA office can usually arrange for someone who is going to the meeting to pick you up.

4 Get there early. Many meetings are held in churches. Watch what door people go in so you can follow them to the right room. If you aren't sure if you're at the right place, ask someone if it is the meeting for "friends of Bill W."

5 Expect to see all kinds of people there: young, old, worn-down, elegant. They may be very different than you. You might be surprised that so many people look healthy and happy. They are all there for the same reason no matter how they look on the outside.

6 Relax. You aren't required to do or believe anything. You don't have to say a word.

7 Watch how the meeting works. They usually begin with volunteers reading from AA literature, followed by a group discussion, book study or featured speaker.

8 Sometimes the leader will ask if anyone is at their first AA meeting. If you want, you can raise your hand and give your first name.

9 Listen. You will get a lot out of your first meeting by hearing others' experiences. You might not understand all the discussion, but try to find something you can relate to.

10 When they pass the basket for donations, you do not have to contribute. If you want to, the normal contribution is $1 or $2 in the U.S. Don't give more than what others are giving.

11 Take a white chip if offered. Some groups give chips to people have been sober for a length of time. They also give a white chip to anyone who doesn't want to drink just for one day. Chips are reminders to help you stay sober. They are free.

12 Ask the chairperson after the meeting for a directory that shows where and when meetings are held. You can go to as many meetings as you want. If you go to a second meeting located near the first one, you might recognize people that were at the first meeting.

Tips

Meetings start on time. Plan to get there early and stay late so people can introduce themselves.

If you get there late, it's OK. Just go in and sit down.

Tell someone you are new. They will probably introduce you to others.

Go sober and not high. Otherwise the experience won't be very useful.

During the meeting, don't ask questions or talk to anyone in the group directly, even if it seems like someone is talking directly to you. Stay after the meeting to ask questions or tell them your story.

There is a lot of laughter in AA meetings. It's also OK to cry.

If you see someone there that you know, don't worry that they will "tell on you." They are probably there for the same reason you are.

Go to a different meeting if you don't hear anything that you can relate to. Each meeting has a unique personality.

If people give you their phone numbers, they want to help if you need it. Call them before you take a drink. Say that they gave you their number at the meeting and you want to drink.

Warnings

Never drive with alcohol in your system, even if you think you need to get to an AA meeting right away. Get someone to give you a ride instead.

The group might ask you to leave and come back another day if you are disruptive or start rambling about something other than alcohol.

Once you get home don't talk about who was there or what they said. One of AA's mottos is "Who you see here, what you hear here, let it stay here."

KPie · Member

That's a great article! Makes me feel a bit more at ease, thank you.

StPeteDean · MIP Old Timer

Katie, I would go to some speakers meetings, where you can listen to others tell their "story". Also look for beginner's meetings. You'll feel more at ease there because you'll be amongst peers. It will be easier for you to share with other beginners. Then when you feel more confident, you can attend and share at regular discussion meetings.

angelov8 · MIP Old Timer

I love women's meetings, well I haven't been to a bad meeting yet, but I recommend trying out all gals. Many say that in the beginning the idea of sitting with just women would be hard, but later find it very different(not necessarily better-every person gets to discover what works for him or her)than co-ed meetings. Women only meetings are also a good place to look for a sponsor, as it is strongly suggested that a sponsor be of the same sex.

Dave Harm · Senior Member

For me, it was speaker meetings. I could sit back, listen and relax... and began to meet people. For me, it would have overwhelmed me to have the added pressure of having to say something in those early meetings. I know I didn't have to but those early meetings it still would have created added stress.

Lexie · Senior Member

Because I wanted to do 90 meetings in 90 days, I put together what turned out to be a pretty cool mix of a Big Book meeting, a step/tradition meeting, and the rest were a mix of speaker/open discussion meetings (that's what most of the meetings around this area are--a speaker for the first 20-30 minutes and discussion for the rest).

When you find a group you like, make it your home group and volunteer to do something for the group (service). I've seen a lot of newcomers take the job of being the "greeter"--just stand by the door and tell people they are welcome. You'll get to know people's faces, they will get to know who you are, and you can make other newcomers feel less nervous about coming in for their own first meeting.

If you show up at meetings early and let someone know that you're new, you will probably have someone introduce you around a bit and collect some phone numbers for you. You don't have to say anything at meetings if you don't want to. Sometimes, in small meetings, they will go around the room/table and ask everyone if they want to share. It's perfectly OK to say you pass for the moment if you have nothing to say.

Almost everybody feels a little awkward in the very beginning, but the more meetings you go to, the more comfy you will feel.

FlyingSquirrel · Senior Member

How shoud I jump into this?

- Katie P

With both feet!

biggrin