hi my name is tracey im a recovering alcoholic. i was 18 wen i went to my first aa meeting, boy was that daunting, id only been drinking a few short months.......what was i doing here! my dad is a recovering alcoholic 30yrs behind him up to today. he spotted the isms in me right from early childhood and often said to my mother oh we are going to have problems with this one. i was extremly shy and timid and found mixing with people very difficult every day stuff was real hard i made a big deal about answering the door or the phone, self esteem was non existant. anyway regardless to say i didnt stay at 18 one meeting and i happily continued drinking until i was 23 (sept 2001, will i ever forget it well the bits i remember)and my disease brought me into a mental hospital! after coming out of there after a month i swore id never drink again, i promised my parents id give aa a good honest try, 9mts and i stopped going to meetings. i was so into myself, deep and wouldnt let anyone near me. i just couldnt talk like these people i dont know myself what will i say. i stayed away and drank again that previous summer. i was on and off it when i could get away with it until i ended up on hospital again in oct 2003. then i agreed to a treatment centre. did my 28 days there and was so enthuastic about AA i really worked hard for 3 years i thought i doing great a few mts short of my 3rd aa birthday i drank again, i was so gutted with myself i had thrown everything away,. how will i tell anyone! i found it very hard to share that. i kept going to aa and please god a day at a time i will have 4 yrs again this july. ive had so many rockbottoms but my worse was when i went out after 3 yrs of good living, i dont regret it as i would not be where i am today only for that slip. i feel spititually well (most of the time) we all have bad days, thats the beauty of being sober and practicing this programme i dont beat myself up anymore no matter how i feeling or even when i make mistakes. ive learned so much, im still learning and i will always be learning. handing over my life, awareness and action are my life now and i like who i am today. aa and my HP has made me who i am given me a second chance at life. i love being sober and for and drop down drunk thats a great statement to make today!! look foward to meeting you all on the boards and will check out some online meetings. cheers bless you all Tracey H
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life is a journey not a destination peace xx Trace
Welcome Tracy! Glad you found us. My story is similiar to yours. In and out of the AA program and institutions for the first few years. I needed that, just as you mentioned. We all have our own journey through recovery. Live, learn and grow. I'm grateful today for my HP and AA. Keeping coming back!
Hi Tracy, Welcome. Thanks for your honest share. God always has a plan for people like us. Sometimes the path becomes difficult but I found that those are the experiences that were most beneficial to the new person.
Thank you for sharing your story. I'm so glad you were able to come back and have reconnected with the joy of a sober life in the fellowship. I appreciated that you feel you've been able to gain from your experience of "going out". I know the history is that many don't make it back. Glad to meet you.
