Hi, May 17 ,1979 I had my last drink. I remember it clearly. I drank to get to the place of no pain. Just as I had always done. It worked. No pain. Shortly after " my time came", my time came. My sufficient bottom was offered to me. the "pitiful and incomprehensible moral degeneration" had occured. As I was standing at the gates of hell, I miraculously cried out for help. Just on the other side of the gate was a member of Alcoholics Anonymous. He reached across the chasm and said take my hand, I did, together we crossed the threshold towards the light. My mom died on the 15th of May in the morning. A couple of days ago. She was a broken girl. She never found the peace from the ravages of all the" ism's "of our illness. No matter how hard I tried I could not find the " mother son Love" with her. The Gift I was able to give her was simple. As the result of working the program and the Grace of God as I understand him, I did not add any extra burdens to her already broken spirit. I was a small ray of light for her. She left this world knowing her son was O.K. She could smile in that peace. Grateful Alcoholic, Wayne T.
-- Edited by Toad on Monday 17th of May 2010 10:30:23 AM
-- Edited by Toad on Monday 17th of May 2010 12:43:33 PM
One heck of a gift to give your Mum - is there any more valued and precious gift that a mother should go to the next life confident that her son is OK in this one?
__________________
It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you got. BB
Hey Toad, May the God of your understanding continue to bring you peace and strength. My father never made it to my surrender but my 84 year old mom did!The best gift I also have is to continue living spiritual principles thru the actions of my life and strive to be as close to my God as humanely possible.Thank you for that blessing today,to remind us of how greatful we should be. Congrats on 31 years 1
-- Edited by mikef on Monday 17th of May 2010 01:14:57 PM
__________________
Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
Larry, ---------------- The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had.
Thanks for your post.......reminds me of what sobriety means to me and to others. It also reminds me how pursuing the place of no pain creates sooooooo much pain!!
Happy Anniversary Wayne T...Keep coming back and helping other stay sober and earning what you and your mother have earned. My mom also got the son that she wanted because of recovery and we were also able to pass on to her the peace and serenity of recovery as she passed. Are those not miracles? (((hugs)))
