Hello. I guess the first thing would be to admit I have a problem. I have only ever said it to one person before. And that would be my boyfriend. But for some reason I don`t think he understands just how much of a problem it is. I really can`t pinpoint when it started. I guess probablly around the time I could buy alcohol for myself... I don`t know what to do about it anymore. Other than maybe being on here will be enough to help me. From what i have been reading, i feel that a day at a time is the only way i will ever be able to deal. I did drink last night, and today i feel horrible. I know i don`t want to drink. I tell myself that all the way to the store, and right up until i have the first one. Then i forget that I didn`t want it in the first place. Until of course i wake up the next day and can`t remember parts of the night. It doesn`t happen every day. So if there is anyone out there who wants to tell me about their day 1 i would appreciate it. I`ve told myself all of this before. But i need to make it real I guess... :(
After years of trying everything else, the only way I ever made a day one stick was by going to a meeting of alcoholics anonymous, raising my hand and asking for help, and then doing what was suggested.
90 meetings in 90 days get a sponsor work the steps help others
nothing else worked for me, that works very well for me
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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
Welcome. The fact that you are here is the start you have made on the first step. An admittance of powerlessness and unmanageability. Now you need help. That is why we are here. We can help. All you have to do is accept. Get a copy of the AA book first. You will hear all our experiences. Do the basics. Meetings and fellowship. Find God and learn to pray. Get a sponsor. Work the steps. Help others. AA does not ask for strength. On the contrary it asks us to admit our weakness.
It was in my weakest moment, when I found that I could not go on any further, that a loving God sent one of his servants from AA to literally hold my hand and take me to my very 1st meeting. I was not in denial by now. I accepted whatever help that was offered and my journey to recovery began.
I remember day 1 very well. It was the morning after my last drunk and it was 5 & 1/2 yrs ago.
I couldnt believe that I had gotten drunk .. again.
I felt horrible, ashamed and just like plain old dog doo-doo.
I had suicidal thoughts and wanted to end my life cuz' I figured I would never be able to stop drinking and I didnt want to live anymore ... drunk.
Something that day told me to get in touch with my sponsor ( I had 2 yrs previous of this time in and out of AA ) and I did get in touch with her. She knew I had been drinking prior and told me I knew what to do. I needed to surrender, get on my knee's and pray and ask for help and get to a meeting. She also suggested that I work the steps with her and not drink one day at a time.
I have done exactly what she has asked of me. I have followed the path that is layed out for me and I havent found it necessary to pick up a drink since then.
If you want to drink thats your business. If you want to stop drinking, then it becomes our business and we can help you. We dont have the power to keep you sober, but we have been given the power to show you how this program of Alcoholics Anonymous works for Us.
If you want what we have and are willing to do whatever it takes to not drink, then you are ready !!
Good news is that you admit you have a problem
Thanks for sharing here. You reminded me of my last drunk and how I NEVER want to repeat it.
I couldn't believe I had got drunk YET again. I promised myself time and time again that I would only have 1 or 2 THIS TIME!!! Of course, that never worked. I am an alcoholic I cannot have one drink and stop.
The day afterwards? My God. The guilt and shame was terrible but the more it went on the worse those 'days afterwards' got. Terror, panic.......wanting to die but being scared of dying.......horrendous.
I physically really hurt someone - could have killed them one night while drunk. When I came round, I finally phoned AA. A lady phoned me back and then met me at a meeting. I was desperate. I had nothing to lose. Me? at an AA meeting...with all those bloody drunks?
Yes. And it was NOTHING like I imagined it to be. It was amazing. The sense of relief at being understood was immediate. The best room I have ever walked into in my life!!!!!
Welcome once again! This place is a great place! Alot of very wise, kind and knowledgeable folk here! I don't always hear what I WANT to hear but I do hear what I NEED to hear!!!
If you wan't to stop drinking then you are in the right place.
I tried everything, when I kept drinking despite my best intentions i finally gave up and went to AA. The best thing that ever happened to me. They not only showed me how to stop drinking, they showed me how to have a life that was happy, joyous and free.
I you want what we have the place to get it is in an AA meeting.
Larry, ----------------- I did not sleep on my lawn last night.
Aloha Zebes...Awesome you have just mentioned your "problem" to a number of others who know what it is and have it also. These others though have the experiences on how to get the "solution" which you have to decide that you really really want and that you can envision your self never having another drink of alcohol for the rest of your life...gulp Of course as I sit here with the distinctive memory of what scotch, gin, wiskey, rum and beer tastes like I can tell you that it can happen only one day at a time and with a lot of help like you have now. Some of us have told you what we had to do to be sober for the periods of time (one day at a) we have accumulated and we had to start at the same place you are at now reaching out for help. I did close to what AGO did because that is what was suggested to me when I couldn't drink anymore. And I couldn't drink any more because the very first sip or gulp gave me a hangover and drinking thru that kinda pain isn't anything like a party. So I could only be told to do what "they" told me they did and none were willing to bs me about it and "they" were all clean, standing up straight with smiles on their faces and sincere as hell.
Don't try this alone. You know how to drink AA knows how not to drink and so if you have the capacity to be honest (you have already) and the willingness you are ready to take the steps we have. Look in the white pages of your local telephone book and find the phone number for AA Central....Get the meeting places and times for the area you are in (AA is world wide...lots of recovering drunks out there to help) and go to the very first available one you can get to. Go early. Sit down at the table or in the circle ...all the way in and listen. Identify yourself when the opportunity arrives and then listen, listen, listen. After the meeting talk to some of the old timers and then find out when the next meeting is...get a big book so you can read in between and get some phone numbers of others especially gals so that you can build a support group or get into theirs... It's all choices and choices without drinking is different.
Welcome, Lisa! I am in Massachusetts, too! First things first.... google Alcoholics Anonymous Massachusetts. I think the website you will find is www.aaboston.org, but you'll find it. Find an AA meeting today and get there. Raise your hand and ask for help, identify yourself as a newcomer. Follow any suggestions you are given.
Repeat the above at least once every 24 hours... and let us know what happens!
I am in Lowell, where are you located?
M
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"I answer to two people, myself and God... and I don't give a s#*% what anyone else thinks of me."-- Cher
Day 1 for me started with a wrecked car that I totaled driving drunk on my way home the night before, my then partner screaming at me, me leaving the house for good to stay with a friend in order to get sober (as my then partner was also a drunk), him begging me to stay and "just pretend to still be together for a while" (nutty codependency), and then contemplating AA further. Hit a meeting by day 3....crying and miserable..but dang, I felt soooo much more hope after that first meeting. Rocky, but uphill since. Welcome Z.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
