I've blundered along sponsoring people for a wee while now, but just recently I've had sponsees who WANT TO GET ON WITH IT!
I don't chase after sponsees, it's a two way street, I'll help when asked, but I don't make house calls.
The sponsees I've currently got, two of them, want to get to grips with the programme. This means I have to refresh my undertanding of the programme. This means I have to read and re read the book. This means I can focus on ME and say to myself, well you'll be recommending this course of action or that way of doing things, but DO YOU DO IT YOURSELF?
I can question myself and sak do you really live this programme as well as you can or are you coasting? Sometimes I don't like the answer I give myself (no, you got your head up your arse here). Then I can ask what shall I do about it and then what will I do about it?
For me, going to meetings is good, but it's not enough. Doing service is good, but it's not enough. Sponsoring others is good, but it's not enough.Living the programme as well as I can, on it's own is not enough. Add them all together and we are getting towards enough, but it'll never be quite enough, I can always get complacent, I can always backslide, I can always coast.
So Sponsees help to keep me on track. I have a nominal sponsee who has got through step 7 and stopped dead. Should I chase him to get him to do step 8 and continue? No I don't think so, you can lead the horse to water.....
I have another one who started step 8 and then drank. Suggests that step 1 got lost somewhere. When he's ready to start again, I'm ready to help.
I have another one who got right through and tries to live the programme as best he can, has a sponsee of his own now. He needs less of my time and help so that frees me to take another one up. But I'll still support him with his sponsee. (and anything else that matters.)
And finally I have one a bit older than I, he's chasing me to get with the programme - another oppertunity for me to refresh my understanding of the programme.
It's all good.
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It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you got. BB
I have another one who got right through and tries to live the programme as best he can, has a sponsee of his own now. He needs less of my time and help so that frees me to take another one up. But I'll still support him with his sponsee. (and anything else that matters.)
Bill you brought back a fond memory to me.
One of the best compliments my sponsor (who sponsors quite a few others) ever gave to me was:
Larry, you are a low maintenance person for me. Others require more of my time.
The day my sponsor told me that certainly was a great day in my sobriety. I pass it on to my sponsees when appropriate so that they too will have a great day.
Larry, ------------------- I came to this program to save my butt and found out it was attached to my soul. --Anonymous
I am a low maintenance sponsee too. I think, if after any length of time I were to continuously be a high maintenance sponsee - as I was in the beginning, I would begin to worry that I was perhaps making my Sponsor my HP. Yes that would worry me.
