I'm on day 7. Losing my mind. Tried calling some friends from the program but they are either out of town, in rehab, unavailable or male. I'm not opposed to calling guys (and I know a few pretty good), but have been told it's not a good practice to get into. Took an ADD inventory today at my therapist's office and scored sky high, so I'm going to look into that more. Meeting with an outpatient program tomorrow for an evaluation. Trying to keep my head on straight through THIS day, but it's not easy! Feeling pretty hopeless right now, but plugging along.
Can you get to a meeting tonight? You will have a lot of support if you can. When all else fails to get someone on the phone, call your central office and talk to them for a while.
Just Don't drink no matter what. There is no problem or no depression that can't be made worse by drinking.
Got any speaker tapes? you can have your own meeting. Just search for Alcoholics Anonymous Speakers. The internet is full of them
My prayers are with you
Larry, ----------------- When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. ~Franklin D. Roosevelt
If you have iTunes, look up AA podcasts, tehre are lots of podcasts on sobriety topics and/or speakers that have really helped me a lot. Even if you don't have iTunes, you can google for them and listen to them online. It'll keep you busy and focused on your recovery so you won't be thinking about you-know-what.
Hang in there! You can do it!
Michael
__________________
"I answer to two people, myself and God... and I don't give a s#*% what anyone else thinks of me."-- Cher
Pray to a tree, Pray to a turtle, Pray to anything but PRAY FOR WILLINGNESS TO LET ANY POWER HIGHER THAN YOURSELF TO TAKE THE JONEZ OFF OF YOUR SHOULDERS!!!!
OR....
Make a Gratitude List: These are all the BLESSINGS in my life that I WILL F**K UP if I drink.
Don't make me drive up there and TP your damn house.
Most people, when they think of "an obsession" think of a thought that just loops over and over and over, for alcoholism that isn't always the case, the obsession will manifest as feeling so uncomfortable, in so much pain, so stressed out, so sad, even so happy THAT I HAVE TO DRINK TO FEEL BETTER!!!!!!!!
That is what untreated alcoholism looks like, there is a reason every single person here says over and over and over and over and over
Get a sponsor work the steps Do 90 in 90 Help others
Because simply put, nothing else works for us "real alcoholics"
Your mind is trying to kill you, it's that simple, and simply "not drinking" isn't the answer, getting into action is the answer
The only ones of us that make it had "The Gift of desperation", because that is what it takes, it sounds like you are approaching that now, we wholly surrender (which means go to the winning side) and we do what is suggested.
Whole heartedly
Half measures avail us nothing, nor do our old ideas, like I will stay sober so I won't lose my family/husband/wife/kids, attend a few meetings and you will meet HUNDREDS of alcoholics where that wasn't enough.
Sweetheart, I say this with all love possible, I BEG of you:
Get off the elevator and on to the steps before you lose everything
__________________
Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
You can do it runnergirl! I am on day 12 today and the first 7 were definitely the hardest. There's some weird comfort in, "Okay, I've made it through a Friday before, I know I can again..." Just get through today. I've at times just told myself to focus on these ten minutes. Think the drink through. Think what it will lead to and remember why you wanted to stop. No one ever wakes up the next day saying, "Gee, I wish I drank last night..." Have something sweet, drink some oj and club soda (always helped my dad with his cravings, helps mine too!) I have found reading things like "Living Sober" or the big book help. Anything to get my mind thoroughly occupied. Any book that is engaging will do though. I am also a fan of reading in the tub because then not only is your mind engaged but there are lots of steps you'd have to take (drying off, etc) in between you and a drink.
I keep myself busy around the house, do work for school, drink juice and eat to help. Reading helps too.
It isn't fun being drunk. At my drunkest moments I was annoying to be around. Remember all the bad things about drinking. For me, a stress was making sure there was enough around. It became a chore to have to go out on the weekends when I didn't feel like it to make sure there was some in the house everyday. After school I always stopped at the store to get beer. It sucked. It is one chore I am happy to NOT do anymore.
Hang in there. I know I am new to this, but I have made it to day 13.
Hang in there Laurie. We all went through it. Getting to daily meetings is uplifting and inspires hope. Our disease wants us to feel hopeless so that we'll keep drinking. Don't drink, don't think, and go to a meeting.
