We all know what motivated us to go to our 1st AA meeting. It was usually The Judge, My Family, I had no where else to go or I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. This list could go on and on.
My question is what caused you to come back? I am sure most of us were told at that 1st meeting to "Keep coming back" Think about it what was your motivation to come back?
Larry, --------------------- Rock bottom is good solid ground, and a dead end street is just a place to turn around. ~Buddy Buie and J.R. Cobb,
Because for the first time in my life I felt "at home"
Because for the first time in my life I felt I was in a roomful of people that understood me, that understood what it was like to be me, who thought like me, I discovered I wasn't "bad", I wasn't a "bad" person, I was a sick person that now had hope to get well
Looking back, I got VERY VERY lucky with my first meeting, actually with AA in that area, it was VERY strong and basic, and there was a LOT of us young-uns
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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
I went back because the man who worked for me at the time, a gruff 75 year old man,(I was 37)would take me.He never talked of steps or anything but making meetings. He was in arrest(as he used to say) for over 25 years,used to go in prisons to carry that message)He would yell at me when I said I couldn,t make it.He died about 8 months later and I just drifted away. I wasn't ready to hear about spiritual principles or "recovery" just knew I could never drink again....Although I never picked up another drink from my surrender december 2nd,1984(my fathers birthday would have been 63)I drifted away from both fellowships for next 20 years or so,clean.abstinent ,but life run riot with addiction,manifested in 'ALL' areasof my life.I had been drinking since I had my first blackout at 12(around '59)thru progression I drank daily unless ,in institution,jail or trying one of them "i'll stop for awhile routines!!Only by the Grace of God do I "work" the process of recovery now....
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
A really awesome woman took me for coffee after and I just felt really accepted and like I should give it a shot. I also figured that if I was there, I probably needed to be there. I doubted someone who could take or leave alcohol would think to bother...
...because the second one was a local gay meeting, and I knew I really wanted to find good gay meetings in my area. (Turned out to become my home group!)
Michael
-- Edited by itsmichael on Monday 19th of April 2010 01:56:47 PM
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"I answer to two people, myself and God... and I don't give a s#*% what anyone else thinks of me."-- Cher
Hey Michael check this out,you may get a chuckle!! During my first week sober,My then sponsor brought me around and it was like my 2nd or third meeting,I was still twitching from detox etc.After sitting in meeting, not really hearing anything,we leave and my sponsor says"whaddya think kid(he was 75 ,gruff)I said I dont know Bob,those people seemed a lot different than me ,i just dont know,So he lites into me,etc your being stibborn ,still twisted, being closeminded,etc...,,He opens up his meeting pamphlet and says "oh sorry kid, we were suppose to go tuesday night ,this was open Gay and Bi-sexual meeting, we were supposed to be at beginners meeting tomorrow....,,,!!!This was 1984 and was not as open as is today..We laughed and enjoyed the moment,at least I made a meeting!!God rest his soul,he was instrumental in leading the way for me..Have a blessed day.....
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
hmmmm... 'twas some years ago, decade or so.... but I think my very second meeting I came back to because my dad and aunt were going to kick my AZZ royally if I didn't. Sad but true, but hey, whatever it takes, right?
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
The people. I had been feeling quite lonely, down and outcast. The people I met were beyond warm, friendly and welcoming. I left that first meeting feeling that life could be good again. I haven't left a meeting yet feeling disappointed that I went.
Oh yeah, another reason I went back was because I want to stay sober. I know there are people in AA who have been successful at staying sober for a long time. I want to be around those people and learn how they have been successful in maintaining sobriety.
-- Edited by Sid on Monday 19th of April 2010 06:36:44 PM
I really don't know why I went to the second meeting - all I know was it wasn't a concious decision on my part, just that somehow I ended up at the second meeting, a week after the first meeting and managed to not pick up a drink in all that time, again, I don't know why, I just didn't want to take a drink - well you know of course I wanted to on one level but on a more powerful level I didn't want to. So I white knuckled it for a bit.
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It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you got. BB
I guess I did my second meeting cos after 7 years since my first meeting, I had definitely become 'SICK OF BEING SICK' At this second meeting, someone welcomed me back, and told me that the past years of my drinking would help many other members get and stay sober. I had no idea how or WHY me being there pissed would help anyone, BUT, (I was undewr the influence remember) it made me feel like the most important person in the whole world ever, so I decided to keep going back to meetings to help these poor souls who couldn't stop drinking on their own.
I am pretty sure that my presence in meetings never got or kept ANYONE other than ME sober, and that, my friends, is the miracle of recovery. Stick with the meetings, even when you don't wanna be there, it is in meetings that you will find the 'spiritual toolkit' which if used will bring about that 'personality change which is sufficient to bring about recovery from alcoholism' (Big Book, spiritual awakening Appendix II
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Serenity is Wanting what you have, not having what you want
Always remember non-alcoholic beers are for NON-ALCOHOLICS
Hey Michael check this out,you may get a chuckle!! During my first week sober,My then sponsor brought me around and it was like my 2nd or third meeting,I was still twitching from detox etc.After sitting in meeting, not really hearing anything,we leave and my sponsor says"whaddya think kid(he was 75 ,gruff)I said I dont know Bob,those people seemed a lot different than me ,i just dont know,So he lites into me,etc your being stibborn ,still twisted, being closeminded,etc...,,He opens up his meeting pamphlet and says "oh sorry kid, we were suppose to go tuesday night ,this was open Gay and Bi-sexual meeting, we were supposed to be at beginners meeting tomorrow....,,,!!!This was 1984 and was not as open as is today..We laughed and enjoyed the moment,at least I made a meeting!!God rest his soul,he was instrumental in leading the way for me..Have a blessed day.....
Hahaha! I love that story!
You know, I go to three gay AA meetings a week... two are open discussion meetings and one is a closed step meeting. In the two open gay meetings, we have quite a few non-gay AA members attend ALL the time, who say they just enjoy the feeling of the meeting, that they feel so welcome and able to be themselves at gay meetings. (To say nothing of the humor... I mean, I get some good laughs at my gay meetings!)
I think that's really cool.....ultimately we should all feel safe and welcome everywhere, but we all gravitate to what feels like the best fit for us. I think it's cool at AA that, just because it says "gay" doesn't mean you have to BE that to be there!
M
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"I answer to two people, myself and God... and I don't give a s#*% what anyone else thinks of me."-- Cher
