39 weeks...3.5 cm...feelin' kinda stressed out...can't go more than 30 minutes from town...can't go out of cell-phone range...praying that they both come out of it healthy...this whole thing isn't about ME but WOW am I feelin' it...ANG-ZYE-IT-TEE!
The last three kids I "took the edge off"...but not this time. Last child I "took the edge off" so much that I don't remember her birth. I HAVE to keep playing that tape (even though it's blank) and do my best to 'Turn It Over'.
All-in-all, if I'm totally honest with myself...I'm not okay right now. Not by a longshot.
Gotta watch my HALTs. Gotta pray for willingness to accept my Lord's guidance and strength. Gotta make an extra meeting tonight.
No...my sponsor is not available. He doesn't seem to be in a returning calls mood of late.
I don't often throw myself out here for support but...I kinda need to know I'm not alone right now. Just for a little while.
One of the most important things I hear in meetings is "The ability to be present"
at births at deaths for family members during times of crisis
you get to be present at the birth of your child you get to be present for your wife you are able to "add to" this situation, not just be hammered somewhere
I can't think of a greater gift, can you?
__________________
Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
Your are not alone. Wow what a great event to be at sober.
Hey Aguaman if your sponsor is not available certainly you must have phone numbers of Sober members of your home group that you admire. Give them a call and tell them you can't reach your sponsor right now but you need support.
Larry, --------------------------- At the end of the day I turn all my problems to God... He's going to be up anyway !
-- Edited by Larry_H on Tuesday 13th of April 2010 05:26:47 PM
The last thing you are is ALONE, HE is there, walking right next to you, and how about some real deep breathing.....
Lately when I see couples saying that "They are Pregnant" as opposed to just the wife, that feels so right on....
You have been on my mind lately with the Miracle coming up and into your life, but have reframed from bringing it up.
You are so cherished, first my your HP, and then all that love you, if you need someone to lean on, then please lean away all you want.
Does your Sponsor ever get messages from you, stating...S.O.S!!! That might get his attention, sure would help.
In the meantime, come back and share 24/7 if you need support and needing not to feel alone....and from someone that reads all that you write, hope you can feel 100% ok.
As Scott Peck wrote in his last book, "sometimes I am NOT ok, and sometimes you are not OK, but the truth is....that is completely OK!...."
Thanks ya'll. Thanks for being here for me. It means a LOT! Yes, this is an incredible gift. She said she's getting closer. That helps. There's a new South Park on tonight. That helps. I have a big bag of Peanut M&Ms...that helps, too.
I talked with her about it. I think my freaking out is that ALL I can do is wait. This isn't a board that I can fasten, a script I can write to completion or even a client that I can force a "yes" or "no" out of so that I can get on with my day and it's not even a craving that I KNOW God will lift if I'm willing to let him.
I have absolutely no control over this in any way, shape or form except to make sure that we're ready to deploy Operation Baby-Drop the moment She says "It's Time!".
My wife is awesome. I trust in Her, God and my soon-to-be-born daughter that everything will be okay. I just need a big dose of Serenity. Thanks...Serenity Friends!
"There's a new South Park on tonight. That helps. I have a big bag of Peanut M&Ms...that helps, too. "
and last but not least...
" ready to deploy Operation Baby-Drop "
your own words are going to bring a big smile to your face in a day or so....
Just a little word of caution, nothing serious, but I recall my husband eating a candy bar in the last stages of my labor, and he got yelled at, right out of the rooms.LOL When we are pushing a big ford out of the eye of a needle, we're not very rational!..
So suggest dont take those yummy M & Ms into the delivery site....
Just trying to make you smile......and dont forget, no matter what, to breath....
Hugs, and see you soon....
Tonicakes ..over and out....finally...
-- Edited by Just Toni on Tuesday 13th of April 2010 08:27:17 PM
This is a patience practice AM...when nature takes it's course and has been already for 39 weeks what will happen will happen and you get to take care of yourself and your sobriety while it does...twiddle your thumbs, read a book to the other kids at home, wash the car whatever and do it with patience. What is happening is normal when you're sober and something else when you're under the influence. Happy for you and remembering my own journey with 4 of my own also...well not only of my own. I played a small part there also and they are paying back...14 grandchildren and 1 more on the way.
Yah...think about us spinsters that will never have kids at all...(not that I don't consider that I have a whole caseload of seriously antisocial ones at work). I think it's great Rob! Good motivation to stay sober.
Just don't become the duggarts or john and kate plus 8 (especially john and kate plus 8)
-- Edited by pinkchip on Wednesday 14th of April 2010 06:30:33 AM
__________________
Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
better you than me Aquadude lol. I stopped at one. Hmm... might've been the only time I did that. :P Congrats and let it go, your stress isn't going to change the outcome but prayer might.
Hey, what great news and OF COURSE you are going to be anxious, that's just human! But it is an amazing miracle to be sober at the birth of your child (and hell yeah, I'll say it, through his/her life hopefully). And I have to second Toni's statement - you are not alone because of HP being with you, your wife and new child. I'm pregnant with my second, and I also believe that being sober is simply about being present. I'm sure you feel helpless in a certain way, but there is so much power to that presence, I can say that as a woman about to go through this again. You are not missing life - literally! Congrats!
better you than me Aquadude lol. I stopped at one. Hmm... might've been the only time I did that. :P Congrats and let it go, your stress isn't going to change the outcome but prayer might.
Congrats! Im very happy for you. My wife and I are considering having another now too.I thank God everyday for my second chance at life.and I thank all of you for helping me get my start! Good luck!
Sure, M (but the almond ones are all gone). Still at BabyCon 3. She's cool as a cucumber. I'm feeling a little better. The Bosses pulled me aside after noticing that my right eyelid was having it's own private seizure on my face, and it was decided that my month's numbers are looking good enough for April & May that I should start my parental leave early before I make THEM crazy, too!
(I felt like Wedge attacking the Death Star "Get outta there, Wedge. You're not doing any good back there!" when there was still a part of me that felt like the sour-faced workaholic, Red Leader, chanting "Stay on target...stay on target..." but then again...Wedge survived episodes 4, 5 & 6 and Red Leader got cooked almost right away. There's a moral there somewhere.)
So, I wait...but it's a lot easier to wait WITH Her and help with nesting, than it is to wait behind my steering wheel or my desk.
The Call of John Barleycorn has faded. Rob - 1, Jack Daniels - 0.
Thanks, Ya'll. I'm the luckiest alkie in the world to have all you other alkies at my side.
And before you ask, my wife already vetoed Lois Wilsa, Willamina Roberta, Amythest, and anything that's A.A.; Amy Anne, Alicia Anita, Avril Annette etc. Before we knew she's a girl I aaallllmmmost got William Robert by her, until I left my Big Book in the bathroom and she started thumbing through it. Busted.
Aquaman wrote: And before you ask, my wife already vetoed Lois Wilsa, Willamina Roberta, Amythest, and anything that's A.A.; Amy Anne, Alicia Anita, Avril Annette etc. Before we knew she's a girl I aaallllmmmost got William Robert by her, until I left my Big Book in the bathroom and she started thumbing through it. Busted.
And Chip was never an option, either.
Peace, Rob
Too bad, they are great names. I suppose she wouldn't like Wedge or Red leader either?
Larry, ---------------- Those of us who are a few bricks short have more fun than the rest of you all
