Monday a student from the town's college came into our noon meeting and asked if anyone would be willing to talk to a group of 50 or so college freshman about their experience with alcoholism and how it started, focusing on the dangers of binge-drinking and how alcoholism destroys lives. The group secretary didn't say anything, and neither did anyone else, so I raised my hand and said "Sure, I'll do it."
It's tomorrow night at 8:30 during an alcohol-free college party in the freshman dorm study lounge.
My feeling when I put my hand up was "aww hell, this kid's asking for help from AA so somebody ought to do it." I've done some public speaking before and I'm kinda good at it, but this is a heavy, heavy topic. I also remember being in high school when somebody brought an ex-junkie into our school to talk to the auditorium about the dangers of drugs and we actually booed the poor guy....
(Awwww hell; I never put that high-school sin on my Step 8 list...is this an opportunity at amends? )
So anyway, I'm looking for opinions and experience from ya'll. Here's my plan....
Open with a joke or two, then go into the story of my first drunk and then how alcohol & drugs crept into my life after that. Tell a couple of war-stories of youth-binges gone horribly wrong and how maleable & stupid I became when drunk. Touch on the arrested development of young drunks and how that leads to being ham-strung in our careers and relationships. Mention alcohol's effect on my family's life and how it has come between me & my wife and me & my kids (maybe use the solvent analogy). Wrap up with how 29 years later I'm trying to learn how to live again via the program and open it up to questions.
What it was like, what happened, what it's like now
Tell the truth and you can't go wrong is my experience
I always tailored my story to the audience as well, so when I have spoken at large groups of non sober people some humor and war stories always helped get the ball rolling
truthfully, your plan sounds perfect, but like Mike Tyson says everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face, getting up in front of large groups of people is like that, truthfully I can never remember a thing I said, it's like a having a 20-30 minute blackout.
-- Edited by AGO on Tuesday 9th of March 2010 07:45:34 PM
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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
Hey Aquaman! way to go,, I could only suggest getting God centered,share from the heart and be honest and it will be fine.Good luck way to carry the message....
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
Aloha AM...Been there and done that and done it after confering with my sponsor. One of my sponsors directions was "be interested rather than interesting" which led me to start by asking questions. "So what is it like for you guys who drink and use?" "How bad has it gotten for you?" "You looking for some kind of information that might help you think you can continue drinking and using without negative consequences or are you looking to arrest a problem?" I look for responses to those questions because then I can be interested and not try to be interesting. I'm there to support not entertain. Come to think about it I don't know of anyone in my family or group of friends that thought my drinking career was very entertaining. Certainly my community and the judges and cops didn't. Maybe they laughed at me when my back was turned but never told me. I'd go ask my sponsor "So how did you do it when you took the chance?"
Good for You. The responsibility declaration came to my mind ... and it is when anyone, anywhere reaches out for help, I want the hand of AA alway to be there, and for that I am responsible.
You're doing the right/responsible thing.
You're also speaking to college freshman. My guess is that the majority of them are into the party scene. But We never know who we are gonna reach, or where a seed might be planted.
Do like the book says ... Our storied disclose in a general way what we use to be like, what happened and what we are like now.
Ask God to let the thoughts be His and the words be yours
I think it's good you are speaking to them and it looks like you have a pretty good plan. I have spoken at local DUI classes in the area and it is for sure a different crowd than a regular AA meeting.
IMO, I would not specifically mention AA specifically in your talk (you could mention 12 step recovery program) .
I know it's anonymity at the level of press radio and films, and I know intentions are good, but we must remember for the protection of the program there are no public representatives either.
I would mention that Alcohol and drugs where just a symptom of the disease, and how the steps work to change the person thier attitudes and defects.
Leave some time for questions at the end. You may want to bring some evaluation literature Ie 44 questions or Who me?, and maybe some contact info and instructions on how to recieve help.
I would approach it more as a educator or councelor with life experience on the subject and less personal then if you are speaking at a AA meeting.
Good Luck!
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Rob
"There ain't no Coupe DeVille hiding in the bottom of a Cracker Jack Box."
Whenever I have shared my ES& H as a Speaker in a meeting, it is always critical to me to not rehearse a word, just allow my HP to guide my words, but then you are not speaking at an AA Meeting......so advice from you Sponsor would be great.
Hope so much to hear back, and I applaud you dear, we love you here, so they will surely love you "there"....you are one amazingly gifted soul here on MIP, always appreciate all that you write.
And before the words begin, don't forget to breath...
Hey AM, You have my deep respect. Do what everyone says above but: CAUTION CAUTION CAUTION CAUTION CAUTION CAUTION Do not get carried away and incriminate yourself. Its a small world, and kids are all over the place today. Deliver the message as I have come to know you can, but if there may be something that may be questionable you may offer up, don't do it. These kids are not part of AA, and in todays world, you may say something that puts you in the headlines with your worst ever picture beside it. Keep it real, but not TOO real! Tom
-- Edited by turninggrey on Wednesday 10th of March 2010 07:36:02 PM
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"You're in the right place. That's the door right there. Turn around."
It went well, thanks for asking! I remembered to keep it from the heart & remember The Traditions as well as "be interested, not interesting". (the latter was tough.) It was an informal group of about 18 or so college freshman. I fielded six or seven questions, some of which came from people who had some familiarity with alcoholism and wanted my take on their situations, some who wanted to make pro-alcohol points and one guy who wanted to know how to play 'quarters' (apparently 1/4's has been replaced by 'beer-pong', which I don't see the point of if there are no penalties for missing).
The students who put it together wanted scary stories of debauchery and consequence, so I gave them a couple of those. They wanted tales of the dangers of binge-drinking, so I gave a couple of those and I managed to really get the point across that we are alcoholic long before we know it and we stop maturing. Our relationships outgrow us, our friendships outgrow us and our careers outgrow us. Booze holds us back and true wisdom never comes until we stop being dependant upon alcohol for our coping mechanism and begin to re-learn how to live.
At the end, I asked them to remember one thing from last night; every so often ask yourself "were any of my bad decisions soaked in booze?" and if you answer yes...take a hard look at your relationship with alcohol.
At the end I got hugs. Wierd. Still not comfortable with strangers touching me.
)
