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Grandnational53 · Newbie

New to the fourm

SoberSteve · MIP Old Timer

You need to get to a local AA meeting. They work! I am living proof. I cannot believe they gave you a coke with rum in it. Hang in there and know you can do this. I will pray for you.

Tessa · Senior Member

I agree with SoberSteve. Find a local AA meeting in your area. I was forced legally (long story) into the meeting rooms. I no longer have to attend AA meeting but I still do on my own. They have become a part of me or I of them. I'd sit & listen too afraid to talk. From the time I stepped in I thought I was better than anyone else there. I couldn't imagine some of the things they'd done. Then I'd start realizing I'd done some of those same things too!! No matter how different, what background, etc you come from. You'll find a lot of simillarities with many in the rooms. We aren't different. We're all the same. People with the disease of alcoholism. You probably won't realize any of this in the first few meetings. That's why they say "keep coming back"!! It takes time for all this to absorb & digest. Take your time & take it easy. No one will expect any great miracles from you. I started in AA to save my a$$ & then realized it'd saved my life.

Jerry F · MIP Old Timer

Aloha GrandNational...It's gonna take some help and there are thousands willing to
support and help you. You gotta come to us and you will find us not only here but
in the sober rooms of AA. I suggest you get there as quickly as you can because
you have experienced only one of the characters of this disease that of relapse which
can take you out permanently. The strong Captain and Coke turned you on again
and the disease has to do catch-up. It wants you to make up for all those drinks
you didn't have after you had stopped. Our disease is progressive...progressively
worse never better.

Here is the suggestion I took when I finally reached the doors of recovery. "Do 90
meetings in 90 days...sit down, shutup, listen, learn and practice what the others
are also doing (which is the entire program). The shutup part was because I knew
absolutely nothing about alcoholism or recovery. Humbling...and I learned a new
definition of that word humble...being teachable. So welcome I am happy you have
found these doors. Go to your local phone book and look up the hotline number
for AA and call it for meeting places and times. There won't or shouldn't be a
shortage of meetings. AA covers the globe. Alcoholism is a huge fatal disease.

Hang out here also...There is a larger welcome coming right up behind me.

smile

-- Edited by Jerry F on Wednesday 10th of February 2010 02:21:39 AM

ljc · MIP Old Timer

Hello Joe and welcome !!

You may not be able to stop drinking on your own and might need professional ( detox ) help thru your doctor.

And, why not try a few AA meetings and share with the members there what you have shared here and you will soon find that you are not alone. There is alot of help and hope in AA, yours for the taking.

It sounds like you are slowly but surely digging your way to what could be a very bad place in your life. Why not stop the process now and live a great life ??

FlyingSquirrel · Senior Member

Being an alcoholic is nothing to fear, I have found. It's one of the few diseases that can be completely kept in remission, with the bonus that when you follow some simple rules, your entire life also improves.

So ya, check out an A.A. meeting, walking through the door does not constitute an admission that you're alcoholic - just that you want more information.

StPeteDean · MIP Old Timer

Hi Joe, welcome to the board. Most of us (if not all) have been where you're at and felt the same way. I learned that although I couldn't stay sober on my own, WE can. A group is always stronger than an individual. Together we stay sober. Call your local AA intergroup and ask them for the locations of meetings in your area. Be sure to raise your hand at the meeting when they ask if there is anyone new or first time at a meeting so that you can get properly welcomed. Get yourself a meeting schedule and a Big book ($3 or the group will give you one if your short on cash). You can begin reading the big book on line here for free.
http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/en_tableofcnt.cfm

pinkchip · MIP Old Timer

Welcome Joe! 1 day at a time, meetings, fellowship, a sponsor....it may sound like a lot, but so so so much better than the alternative which is the despair you are describing. Like just about everyone here will say...I have been where you are describing and it was awful. On the flip side, the degree to which drinking made me that miserable was a good set up for surrender and building a strong foundation for sobriety. I do not want to go back. You/We can stay sober together as others have stated here.

I also stopped on my own with no meetings for 4 months before AA and when I relapsed...that is when drinking became so reckless and went from every other day to daily and doing all sorts of crazy destructive things...yeah...progressive disease for sure.

-- Edited by pinkchip on Tuesday 9th of February 2010 09:30:40 AM

mikef · MIP Old Timer

Welcome to the family!!! smile

SteveP · MIP Old Timer

Hi Joe, welcome. Lots of great support and wisdom on this board.

In my own experience, there is absolutely nothing that I can do to stop drinking by myself. I tried everything, including like you, going dry on my own.

The only thing that has worked for me is getting to AA meetings and following the program. It works. I am at a stage where I simply can't drink anymore IF I do that.

What I also know is that IF I do not do that, then I drink again. I simply don't have any choice in the matter. I'm not saying that that is where you are, but that's where I am.

I should add that as I heard someone say at a meeting last night, I love going to AA meetings.

Keep coming back!

Steve

-- Edited by SteveP on Tuesday 9th of February 2010 10:40:25 AM

Mike B. · MIP Old Timer

Hi Joe,
Welcome to the board. Come back and let us know how that meeting was. Wishing you luck on your new journey.

Just Toni · MIP Old Timer

Hi There Joe and Welfcome!

There is a saying..."AA meetings are rooms full of
people that CANNOT..NOT DRINK"....and somehow they do arrest the Disease with the continued practice of the 12 steps, a Sponsor, and the Loving and caring people that all do this Together, "We Can't, He Can, and We Let Him"

Hope so much that you will try what has been suggested.

Taking your worries to a meeting, everyone in that room will identify with what you have said here.

Your worries today, in my opinion are a real Blessing.

After relapsing for almost 10 years in the AA way of doing things, Joe, it was the terrifying FEAR that I would go back to my old ways, that FEAR got me to a meeting everyday for over a year....

Pray that you can go, sit, talk and really listening to others takes so much power away from the "I can't Stop"
The 90 in 90 days, no drinking in between, and You can do this along with all of us in this WE program....

Hope so much to see you again real soon.

Hugs, Toni

Aquaman · MIP Old Timer

Hi,
You're on the right track. Go to some meetings and see if AA is a good fit for you. Another good first action is to talk with a physician or alcohol abuse counselor. Alcoholism is a disease and professional attention should be utilized. Good luck! We're here for you.

Peace,
Rob

Grandnational53 · Newbie

Thank you all . I will make sometime to go

murrill · Veteran Member

Joe,
I saw myself in your story. I knew I had a problem, but I could not stop. I switched liqours, I tried to pace my drinks, I tried lots of geographic cures. I was a Fri-Sat-Sun drinker for most of my alcoholic career. By Monday I would vow that I'd had enough. A day or two later I was planning my next drunk. By Friday I was agitated while I wrestled with the decision to drink or not...and after work, when I'd picked up my bottle, I felt enormous relief. Through the course of it all I lied, I stole, I offended most everyone I knew, had legal problems, lost jobs....by then I told myself that it was no use to get sober---I could never rise aboe the damage I had left in my wake. And sometimes I thought that if I could just get my "head" together I wouldn't be so friggin' crazy when I drank...maybe I'd even be a normal drinker. Of course, I would never pull it together until I quit drinking. And the idea of living without a drink was devastating. There was a lot of shame & self-loathing that I was trying to drown with that bottle. The irony is that rather than drowning it, I merely created more. In the end I couldn't do it anymore. Alcohol had won the battle, and I surrendered. Didn't know exactly what I was going to do, but it was over. I didn't drink for a few weeks, though I can hardly say I was getting better just yet. Finally checked into a treatment center for depression, and they made me go to AA. I never thought I'd belong at an AA meeting--I'm not one of "those people," I thought---but that is where I discovered the tools for living sober. Only the first steps concerns itself with alchol; the remainder are about living sober. So the real question is this: Have you had enough? I needed every drink I ever took, until I didn't need another one.