A few weeks back I asked the members of Miracles In Progress for financial help so the needs of the newcomer into the MIP Recovery Homes could be better met by Rose and I during such a trying economic time. I believe in accountability and transparency in such matters.
To say the very least, I was absolutely amazed at how my request for volunteer help in this area was received and responded to by people all over the world. I reached out and you reached back. Some contributed two dollars, others 5.00, 10.00, 25.00, 50.00, 100.00, 250.00 and even 500.00. The total sum of what members of Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums contributed to this effort has thus far totaled 1,428.63.
Not everyone sent funds but many sent emails stating they wish they had funds to send, and asked that they be notified in the future should the need for help exist at a later date.
Some sent clothing, hygiene supplies, coffee, cleaning supplies, etc.
All I can offer in return is a promise to be a very good, responsible steward to such an outpouring of your help. We should be able to sustain our ability to continue helping the new person for a good while with the help we have received from you. We will use discretion as to when and how to help the new person so as to make these funds stretch and be able to refrain from asking for any further help from MIP members for the duration of 2010.
What you have done collectively as a fellowship is beyond description. It's more than money, or materials. It reached my heart is such a way and humbled me to a point of tears of gratitude.
Someone is getting a much needed haircut today thanks to you, someone else is getting a bus pass for job hunting purposes thanks to you. The list of needs that will be met as a result of your kindness and generosity is essential to giving a person a fair chance to establish a new beginning in life. A beginning that allows them to enter the arena of recovery with some pride, integrity, and hope.
The best blessing in all of this is seeing what I often take for granted put a spark in someone's eyes, or a smile on their face. Something as simple as deodorant, toothpaste, toothbrush, a disposable razor and some shaving cream.
The human spirit is so alive here at Miracles In Progress! Thank each of you, even those who didn't help in this effort, for whatever reason, for being here; for caring enough to share your heart.
No one here escapes without making a difference in the lives of others. The words you say, someone will walk away with and grow as a result.
I am so glad you received the help you needed. Sometimes we can't help another alone & have to ask others for help in order to help another. Does that make sense? lol I commend your efferts & what you & your wife are doing.:)
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God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. Courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Rheinhold Niebuhr
John, that's some amazing work that you and your Wife are doing there. I'd like to drop by this year. And old HS friend of mine lives in Wilmington and I'm going to visit him sometime probably in the fall.
Tradition 6. "An A.A. group ought never endorse, finance or lend the A.A. name to any related facility or outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property and prestige divert us from our primary purpose."
1. 12,000 INDIVIDUALS were asked for help. Not a specific group. If this was a site for Mothers Against Drunk Drivers, I would have still asked for the help from the individual members of the site, not as a group or as members of the aligned organization. But as individuals who would be allowed to seek their own conscious as to if, when or how to help.
No one was asked to donate to Miracles In Progress Aftercare Recovery Homes as an enity or enterprise, but in numerous parts of the letter sent out it specifically stated that "Rose and I" needed the help, in order to keep providing the personalized help to individuals in the homes, based on their individual needs.
2. It was never approached as a group related issue, so the group didn't have to endorse or oppose it. It was never made a part of any group agenda. It was approached as a "personal" request for help, from one individual to many individuals, with each able to seek thieir own conscious and heart as to how they respond to it. As stated in the letter... "It is a personal request for financial help. Please allow me a moment or two of your time to express the need for it."
3. The name Alcoholics Anonymous was not attached to the request in any manner, nor is it attached to the homes the men are in. Nor were only those affiliated with AA solely approached on this site for the requested assistance. Of all asked, those with an AA affiliation only account for approximately 25%.
4. This did not take anything away from our primary purpose, but allowed us to better fulfill it as individuals who choose to do so.
Thanks to Alcoholics Anonymous, I have 20 years of continuous sobriety, and as the founder and webmaster of Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums I have over 10 years as an active member here. I must admit I'm always amazed when someone who has been registered on this site for a week and posted 12 times determines how we should do things, or deligates themselves as our Traditions Police.
Should the day ever come that it becomes a violation of Tradition to ask for help, or give help as a individual to individuals without the approval of the group I would personally dissociate myself from the organization.
I am accutely aware of the Traditions, and the spirit in which they were written. "Asking for YOUR help" clearly indicates it is a personal request to individuals" As many who have been here for years can verify, if it were a group request/endeavor, I would have titled it, "Asking for the Groups Help"
Lastly, in 20 years, no where have I read that we should ever try to utilize any part of this program, to belittle, devalue or degrade another human being or their efforts to help others.
To the contrary, this is what I have read many times over the years. "I am responsible. When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help, I want the hand of AA always to be there. And for that: I am responsible." (AA declaration of responsibility)
(12 Steps and 12 Traditions, contents pg 10 Tradition 5) ..."The ability of each AA to identify himself with and bring recovery to the newcomer is a gift from God... passing on this gift to others is our one aim."
(Big Book pg 96) ..."He may be broke and homeless. If he is, you might try to help him about getting a job, or give him a little financial assistance."
(Big Book pg 97) ..."Never avoid these responsibilities, but be sure you are doing the right thing if you assume them. Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. A kindly act once in a while isn’t enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan every day, if need be. It may mean the loss of many nights’ sleep, great interference with your pleasures, interruptions to your business. It may mean sharing your money and your home, counseling frantic wives and relatives, innumerable trips to police courts, sanitariums, hospitals, jails and asylums. ..."
This is a code of ethics I adopted early on and can live comfortably with inside my own skin today. I am forever grateful that I was taught that it is okay to ask for help, that pride should be put to the side when help is needed and I am grateful I was taught that I should possess the willingness to help when asked if its within my means and does not go against my personal values or morales, or interfer with my ability to met other obligations I am previously committed to.
As for being "santioned" by WSO. I don't have a clue what you are referring to, because I have never sought any form of santion from WSO for this site, this group, or the homes I run. So, with all due respect, it is obvious you don't have a clue what you are talking about or referring to.
It is my greatest hope that you will stick around and share from a place of experience, strength and hope as it relates to your alcoholism. Not show up here and think that you need to point out to us the "right way" of doing things, when we have done well for almost 12 years without your presence. How did we possibly do this? By following the Traditions to the very best of our ability as a group.
In the spirit of recovery, John
-- Edited by John on Saturday 6th of February 2010 11:26:36 PM
-- Edited by John on Saturday 6th of February 2010 11:27:28 PM
Please, don't hesitate to contact us when you are heading in this direction, we'd love to have you join us for a meeting and a dinner. If you need my phone number I'd be glad to send it to you, k?
John, I appreciate your detailed response because although I fully support with all my heart and more! your service in regards to the request for money, I have to admit that I personally wondered how it fit in with the AA traditions. I don't think Wolfie's comment was out of line. Perhaps the tone was a bit offputting. The end result is good information. Thank you for sharing.
Thanks for your help in clarifying that John. As you may have noticed I had already realized my blunder and retracted my comment before you decided to school me on the traditions or impress me with your longevity. Obviously, I misinterpeted your intentions. I'll try to be more supportive and less opinionated in the future. Well, supportive anyway.
