Hello Michael, nice first post. Welcome to the board and we hope that you'll stay around and help us to stay sober.

Welcome aboard Mike. My name is Justin. Hope you can get to some meetings and get grounded at what ever city you live in. You already know some of the basics I think, so just stick with it and ask for help!
Peace, and remember one day at a time!

Morning Michael! welcome to the family......

I reckon I must be on my fourth or fifth recovery now, but thankfully, this one has lasted sine July 1990, so I guess what they told me in early days is true - NEVER QUIT QUITTING'

I was in and out of AA rooms for seven years, which earned me the name of 'The Golden Slipper'   Welcome to the forum Mike.

Hey guys,
Thanks for the welcome. I read in another post that saying the words "Hi my name's Mike and I'm an alcoholic" were the hardest words for this person to say. However, I stick true to this comment. I remember, for the longest time, (since 16 or 17 probably), that I've had nothing but troubles come from the drinking. Broken relationships, yes young ones... but still people I cared about regardless.. college relationships broken, friendships that could have been broken and most of all just utter shame in regards to what I had been doing. Too many apologies to count on two hands two feet and more. Too many forgotten nights, and too many unforgotten nights I wish were forgotten. Alcohol is quite the bitch when you're like us, and I am excited to just take the plunge this time and so I no longer have to apologize for things that I would have only done when I was drunk or high on drugs, or both, for that matter. Not to mention, with all these things being so heavy for so many years, it makes you pretty mentally unstable to just snap in anger, burst in tears, or do things that you never even knew you had in you. Anyways, I know the things I'm saying most people know, but I suppose after a while you look in the mirror and see a figment of once was in your life, and what really could be, and when all flaws and failures, or at least mishaps, point to one thing.. It's time to rethink things. I remember first time I was arrested at 18, booked and printed the officer was pushing my hand down onto the print paper and noticed gashes in the topsides of my hands from punching a window out and from punching random, quite solid objects and gave me the hint to quit drinking. Needless to say, I had this said to me a few other times from underages and then was said again at 20 when another officer said it to me. I guess Through and through, the signs have been there, but I wasn't ready to see them. It's a long road, I know this, and I now know I'm ready to see them, I just am hoping that I have the extra force and belief that I am ready to dive in and believe in them and abide by them.

Hello , welcome to the Group !!

Haven't been around for a few weeks... Been drinking, it's been same thing, new day (or weekend..) Definitely have lost focus on a lotta stuff, just in the past few weeks. I guess when I moved from where I was to where I am now, I expected all the problems to just go POOF and disappear. Now I'm onto finding a meeting down here where I am now. I guess it's always been hard for me to admit I'm powerless over alcohol -- or even if I have, I don't want to believe it. It's hard for someone as young as me, who's been capable of doing most anything in life to admit I'm powerless over anything. However, I've found that I've gotten lucky, gotten in plenty of trouble, and just this past weekend even had a friend who was driving my car get a DUI with my in the passenger seat. Car is still in the impound because I spent all my money over the past few weeks boozin at the bars, making "friends" by buying them whatever they wanted. I guess a lotta kids know me now -- unfortunately it's not the ones who are gonna allow me to go anywhere positive. I guess at this point, I give up. I give in. I'm numb and tired and sick of thinking I can beat this on my own while continuing to drink. I've lost focus, I've lost control... I spend more money than I have and can't even count how many times I'll look at my bank account nearly sick from the amount I'd have spent the night before, which apparently was well worth it (if only I could ever remember.. eh?). Theyre always the most expensive nights you can't ever remember... But now I'm onto quitting with the excuses, quitting with all the madness... Sick of spending time like this fading away to a mere nothingness. I guess the more you wanna be an angel, the more the devil wants you, eh? Wanna soar with the best of them, but then end up lying with the worst of them.

Anyways, my question is about Big Book meetings vs. Discussion meetings. I know my sponsor before, he told me to stick with Big Book meetings. He had been goign to discussion meetings on his first time around before the relapse, and I know that the only time I've ever felt kinda back to the epitome of the person I once knew was when I was sober and going to BB meetings, working with him and kinda finding truth in the big blue book with stories of a buncha crazy drunkards that admitted we were powerless. I'm not the kid who drinks everyday, but when I do -- it's a two day occasion. No sleep, shaking for the next day at least with tremors... It's a horrible feeling, and yet I always wonder why I go back to it.

I guess it's time to call a truce with myself, get everything together and get underway. No more BS, no more excuses, and no more lying to myself, more than anything. Hope to keep you guys here with me along for the ride and hopefully one day I can be like many of you saying how I am a year, then two, then continue on... Cause at this point, it seems like it's the only way.