After reading today's Daily Reflection, I got to thinking about the various ways people find their way into AA. Some people hit bottom and seek help, others are court-ordered, some are trying prove to themselves they aren't alcoholic, some homeless folks are looking for free coffee and a warm spot for an hour. Some, like me, first came just out of curiosity. (I knew I was alcoholic, but I wasn't ready to sober up yet)
The best story I heard was from a lady in Knoxville. She attended meetings at an old AA clubhouse that was in a scruffy building in a scruffy part of town. She said that many years before, she came to her first meeting there carrying a 12-pack of beer. When they told her at the door she couldn't bring the beer inside, she was confused. She honestly thought that Alcoholics Anonymous was a group of alcoholics who didn't like to drink alone but had been banned from every bar in town! She thought they'd pooled their money to rent out a place to drink together!
Despite her initial disappointment, she kept coming back. Last I heard, she had several years of sobriety. I chuckle every time I think about that lady's tale.
Any other good stories? How about your first AA meeting?
I went as a suggestion of my alcoholic wife's sponsor. Big crowded Hospital conference room and I sat against the wall near the door next to my wife and her sponsor seething in anger and hate. The room was crowded with mostly guys taller than me wearing blue jeans, plaid shirts, boots and big buckles. Couldn't see anyones faces because they smoked at that meeting and it looked like the smog had come within 5 feet of the floor. I hated the room, I hated what they talked about, I thought they were stupid and I hated them. When I got the chance I responded to my spouses question about whether I thought she was an alcoholic with a resounding NO!! and she went back out on another 3 to 4 year run. I however for some reason could not and would not drink anymore I found my self begging for help at 3am one morning in an empty parking lot 2600 miles from where I was created and reasoning that I would even agree to any form of alien transportation off the face of the earth. Little did I know that the most alien thing that heard me at that time was my HP. I stopped drinking altogether and entered AA by circling the meeting rooms as a member of the Al-Anon Family Groups for 9 years and then that same HP found the opportunity to present me with a blank assessment form. I filled it out and took it to the head nurse of the Adult branch of the ARC Alcoholism Recovery Center; and asked her for her feedback. Fifteen minutes later she advised, "Who ever owns this assessment needs to be in inpatient recovery immediately or the next time they drink they die." My names was not on the assessment...it was anonymous and valid. That was I believe on a Wednesday and that evening I was sitting in my first "for real" own AA meeting...in the corner...in the dark...not wanting to say that sentence that all of them said in humility and they stopped the meeting until I spoke up. "my name is Jerry F and I'm alcoholic." For this I am deeply grateful and in awe.
-- Edited by Jerry F on Sunday 10th of January 2010 05:18:58 PM
Jerry F -- When you mentioned the assessment form it reminded me of the first time I went to treatment and filled out such a form. There were 20 YES/NO questions like "Has alcohol ever affected your work? Do you drink in the morning?", etc.
I was honest and finished the questionairevery proudof the fact that I'd only answered YES to 19 of the 20 questions. I reasoned that I wasn't 100% alcoholic. When I turned the sheet over, it said "If you answered YES to 4 or more questions, you are definitely an alcoholic."
I was stunned.
Not stunned enough, though. I drank another 10 years before I even started to get serious about trying to get sober.
I went to my first (conscious) meeting after having not spoken to another human beign for oh about 10 days locked up basically in my apartment wi the 10 -12 different pills the hospital sent home to start my physical recovery(demise?) with. The lady speaking told my story almost exactly funny isn't it if you just show up you will find yourself here. Anyaway my now friend Walt was there looking at me like i was Bill the Cat anybody remeber who that is? I loked like an orange scarecrow could barely speak weighting in at 115 and a half pounds Michael. Unbelievable I still cannot believe I am alive. Grateful to God and allof you AA's on whose backs I rode for so long till I could stand up at least and help alittle. love Michael
I understand and empathize with Bill the Cat...Yaak!! I loved that comic strip and could not wait for the next issue and the next. There was so much real world stuff in that for me...better than the one I lived in on a daily basis. Somedays I'd do the comic strip and not feel like drinking. I could alter without the bottle. LOL I think I'll make a trip to Borders and curl up with an issue. LOL
My first meeting was at 16 years old. I made a deal with my mother, that if she bailed me out of jail (drunk in public) that I'd go to an AA meeting. She had a big biker guy take me and he was pretty cool. I just wasn't ready. Amazingly 14 years later, when I had a year sober, I tracked that guy down and thanked him.
-- Edited by StPeteDean on Monday 11th of January 2010 07:19:33 AM
Let's see... how'd I get here? I spent the summer of 2009 way, way down in my cups. If I think of my alcoholism as a speeding car, in June 2009 I stepped on the gas pedal and went from zero to one hundred and sixty in about 3 weeks. My daughter was away for the summer, and I could play, and did I ever. Weekend of August 21st I hit bottom, not known to me at the time, my mother (who was spending 2 weeks with my daughter at the time) was within hours of calling my daughter's father and having him take over custody. She- mom- "suggested", just suggested to me that I try a 12 step program. That was Sunday. Monday I crept into the basement of a church near my house for an early evening meeting, I was sure everyone in there knew I was a horrible awful person and that I was new. The awkward feeling lasted about ten minutes.
Think I will forego the 8+ years of going to a meeting and raising my hand as yes, a newcomer.....cause you all know how that turned out.
Then when my health and life were on the line, in my mind, what mind I had left, the first meeting, the first month, all the way up to about 6 month, felt EXACTLY like I was in ICU, not AA, never mentioned it to anyone, but there i sat, shaking on the inside, totally obsessed with only one pre-occupation, that i would, only with HIS help, make it back the next day,not drink in between, and my loving HP, whom I choose to call GOD, allowed that to happen one day at a time for the entire year. then after that being convinced now that I did have a FORCE in my life, that had so much more power than the Disease, I began to grow little wings of hope, and it all turned out well, well just for today, and when I wake up tomorrow, will turn to that same Prayer of Please God, guide me through this new day, sober.
Thank you God for allowing a drunk, such as myself to see your Light, and keep my Recovery in first place for so many years, one day at a time,
I'm trying to make every meeting as humbling as my first. I went into my first meeting knowing that I had a drinking problem. I'm tired. I'm going to bed.
My first AA meeting came on the heels of a PI arrest and an ER visit. I didn't know anything about AA, other than they had a list of "steps". Part of me was interested in checking it out just to see if I was alcoholic, and the other part thought that maybe I could be talked into drinking normally, or something crazy like that. When I walked into my first meeting I immediately saw my parents' best friend- a District Judge who had personally seen me in the drunk tank about 7 years prior on my first arrest. I later found out there was a judge there from a neighboring county as well.
My first meeting occurred the day after I crashed my car drunk and broke up from my 7 year partnership with another alcoholic. My only friend at the time, who I was staying with saw my wrecked car and stated she thought I needed to go to AA. She was really the only person that knew how sick I was and how I'd been passing out, hurting myself, making whack phone calls I didn't remember...drinking on the way home from work while driving...I called her numerous times crying and saying I wanted to die....blah blah. So I went to stay with her after the evil break up which I wont go into...We looked on the computer and found a meeting called "sober gay and proud." I was like "WTF! They have gay meetings!" I was still scared and she offered to go with me, but I went by myself. It was at the GLCC (gay and lesbian community center). Strangely, it was not in the room that it stated on the computer. I found an OA meeting in progress and those people were of no help. I went outside and literally was standing between the GLCC and a bar. I was like "WTF is with these gay alcoholics not having their meeting where they say?" Do people just schedule meetings and nobody goes? The bar was not one I'd been to much. It was a gay bar of course...strip bar with yucky ugly dancers that are too young (blech)...So i see a light on this garage portion of the building and start inching towards it. I opened the door and the meeting was a speaker meeting 15 minutes in progress. I said "is this AA?" The speaker said something like "You need a ticket to get in." Later I heard people gave him the business about that, but it went totally over my head. After he was done talking, I shared and spilled my guts...crying...the works. Surrounded by loving people that gave me a big book, told me I never needed to drink again, drew maps to the clubhouse for me and laid out a whole week of meetings for me to go to and they also gave me like 10 phone numbers or so. Pretty amazing. I came back and continued to do so every day. So...I almost didn't find that meeting and I was literally standing in between a bar and the meeting. The book states "We stood at a crossroads and chose to surrender" This was true for me literally and metaphorically. I think God steered me in the right direction. Kinda spiritual.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
