This is one of the most difficult posts I have ever made. I am a alcoholic and I am ashamed of it. I had my last drink on Thursday and I attended my first AA meeting Friday night.
Today I woke up and soo desperatly wanted to run to the store but I didn't.
I am a stay at home mom and once the kids left for school I tried to keep busy and I took a nap.
Welcome to MIP, Jen. Damn straight it does when we knuckle down & do whatever it takes. That for me was doing as you've done, attending A.A. meetings & staying in touch with other alcoholics. Stay faithful to what's suggested & at 4 days sober I can assure you these will be the hardest days you may ever have to experience as far as getting sober is concerned. It is my experience that Sobriety keeps getting better & better because I am working the steps on a daily basis & so able to keep my thoughts & emotions in check.
Faced with the likelihood of an alcoholic death sooner or later if I go back to drinking this is undoubtedly the easier softer way. You are not alone. There are so many of us here who remember our first days, weeks & months getting sober. It does get easier & we will share our experience, strength & hope with you as we go. Being a newcomer is a particularly special time. I'm so thankful for the love & support I received when it was all I could hope for. It's still here for me today except today I also have a faith of my own understanding which brings me so much strength too.
Here for you in hope, faith & fellowship. Keep coming back, Danielle x
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Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!
Welcome to the board. It is very tough for the first thirty days but you on track. Keep posting here. You will find it to be very supporting and helpful.
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You have to live life to the fullest because you don't know what you got till it's gone.
hi Jen..welcome to MIP..you are doing exactly the right things..try to go to as many meetings as possible...find a sponsor..and yes, it does get easier...i just got my 90 day medallion..and i know that i never would have made it but for the grace of God and my AA friends..yep i pretty much gave up my drinking friends..please, know that you are so worth it..these people are real, they are genuine..and when they say they love you, they mean it 100%..we have all been exactly where you are now...please keep coming back.
I have 13 days sober and it's the hardest thing in the world. Go to as many mtgs as possible And talk to as many people in the program. One day at a time... So hard but I know this is a clear and joyous path that I want to share with my children.
Not much to add except for hello Jen and welcome to the board. Don't be ashamed about having a disease, it happens to the best of us. Take pride in your efforts to make changes to your life for the betterment of your family's life and your own.
Would you be ashamed of having diabetes? It's very similar-- except our "sugar" is alcohol and our "insulin" is AA.
Yes, it gets much easier. In fact, life in general gets better in every way-- even better than before you started drinking. The first couple of weeks are the hardest. Hang in there.
Keep coming back! I did :) it works if WE work it - A.A. is a "we program" because "We admitted we were powerless..."
There is nothing more powerful than to admit that we are powerless! I can honestly say that I'm happy to be powerless - because it reminds me that alcohol is not the only thing I am powerless over - and that makes the big things not seem so "BIG" - and that's when i can stop and smell the flowers, because the "little things" aren't so "little" anymore - we can learn to appreciate the little things in life :)
Aloha foof!! Yes it does get easier and no matter what don't take the first drink and don't do your own thinking for the first 90 days. Let the program be it all for you for now. Ours is a very simple program for complicated people so when you have questions and concerns save them for those who have time in recovery. You will get the answers later on down the line. I am glad you are here and I'm in support of your journey.
I remember crying and whining in early sobriety to my sponsor about something she had suggested for me to do ... and I said " Mary, I dont wanna do that, thats hard !!". And her reply to me was .. " Did I ever tell you this would be easy Lori ?".
No, she never did tell me it would be easy. But she did tell me with God and AA and the fellowship it is attainable. I can acheive sobriety when I do the work . The work is the steps and following the path that has been laid out for me by the Founders of AA.
The first few days, weeks , months and even years can be difficult for some. It all depends on me and my attitude.
Please, I would highly suggest that you search out a female sponsor in the meetings. Obtain our text .. ( better known as the Big Book ), and read the the first 164 pages . Continue with as many meetings as you can. Work the steps with your sponsor. And yes - the process of getting and staying sober will get easier as time goes on. You can make it as fun and smooth as you want, or you can make it as ruff and miserable as you want. The choice is yours
Again, welcome !! Dont drink, go to meetings, pray , get a sponsor and work the steps and your life will improve dramatically.
Hi, yes it gets easier to stay sober, if you put the work in. Meetings, sponsor, home group, step group and steps.
ashamed of being an alcoholic - I know that, I felt that for weeks and weeks, but you and I have an illness - would you be ashamed of having cancer?
being an alcoholic is not your fault, therefore it's nothing to be ashamed of. Acting on the alcoholism and drinking is your responsibility, as some one else has said it takes many muscle groups and a lot of co-ordination to pick up that first drink. After that you have no choice any more. All you got to do today is not pick up that first drink.
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It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you got. BB
I was giving the book at my meeting last week and I have been reading it like crazy.
I really wish there was more meetings during the day...there is 1 in the morning but nowhere near me. I am a morning drinker and if I can make it to 10am then in my mind I think it's too late to drink. (I know...pretty pathetic....lol)
I plan on going to a meeting tonight.....it works with dropping my boys off at wrestling practice and my daughter (11 ) can stay home by herself for 10-15 minutes till my husband gets home.
Welcome......, meetings, getting a Sponsor, and working the Steps, you will discover, like we all did, that there is no shame in having this Disease, just a feeling that I believe comes directly from the Disease itself, to keep you down and drinking.
The beginning in tough, but it does not last long, I recall that, and it is eased by the meetings, so it has been mentioned 90 meetings, in 90 days, I would try my best to do that, for after that time you will feel very strong in your efforts to continue to not drink, just one day at a time.
I'm right there with you... Staying at home offers a lot of alone time to think and plan, doesn't it? Still trying to get my mind around the fact that I might have a problem, hopefully I'll have myself figured out soon... just might be joining you on this adventure.
Congratulations on making those important (and difficult) first steps... :)
-- Edited by runnergirl on Tuesday 8th of December 2009 10:53:57 PM
WOOHOO you got to day FIVE!!! Thats amazing. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other and use ALL the tools in the AA toolbox, especially the ones Bill listed above. Christmas is looming, and it's a bad time for newly recovering alkies (and old timers too sometimes!!) so what do we do in AA?? Make sure we have extra meetings, let people know that our phones don't get switched off because it's Christmas.
If anyone who's struggling or on their own over Christmas wants to, my door is open to them, just as oldtimers doors' were open for ME anytime I needed it. It does ME more good to give back to newcomers than they will ever know. In fact it humbles me to think that someone might even consider visiting or phoning ME over Christmas.
Back in the day when I would buy 'Christmas drink' for the visitors, but would have to buy it three times over from October onwards, cos of course I bought it early, drank it and bought it again, and oddy enough, we never had any visitors over Christmas. My home was a dangerous place to be at Christmas!!
I just heard that one newcomer has just celebrated a wonderful event, and did it in the old way. The message he sent was, 'Sorry Avril I've let you all down' Fact is, we only let ourselves down when we go back out to do more reasearch into alcoholism.
Hopefully, he'll be one of the lucky ones who get back sometime. The unlucky ones usually die.
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Serenity is Wanting what you have, not having what you want
Always remember non-alcoholic beers are for NON-ALCOHOLICS
I'm new here, too. Don't like the fact I needed to come here but I had to do something.
I can go long periods of time without drinking. My main problem is well..."problem drinking". I just cannot handle drinking anymore. Over the past few years I tried counting my drinks and would obey my "rules" for months at a time but I would always screw up (screwed up bad last Saturday).
I'm pretty much at another rock-bottom right now. its tough.
Anyway, I'm sick of it and am on here asking for a little support/help. Thanks to whoever started this forum.
Hey Wesley, and welcome to the board. Please start a new thread to introduce yourself so that you can get a proper welcoming from our regulars. Include the particulars about your experience in it. Binge drinkers fascinate me. I'm your garden variety get hammered every night drunk. It must be hard to come to terms with a part time problem. But I can assure you that what ever it looks like now to you, it will get worse over time. Stick around and help us to stay sober.
