160 days sobber from 18 to 20 beers a day to zero ,I miss it sometimes. I sat with two old friends my old beer drinking buds it was hard to watch them be drunk .The song you ante no fun since i quit driinking came to mind,friends don;t come arround much i know thats best they all drink 20 years of friendship a lot of memories with these people.Bills hurt harder or its cause im sober and drink covered up that feeling up i was a productive drunk i made up my own law no drinky till chores were done i could be done by 10am on a day off.I switched to zanex to get off beer or weed always something how would it feel to have nothing in me? Thank you for listening I'll make it but wholly hell .
-- Edited by major64 on Saturday 28th of November 2009 11:32:40 AM
Hello Major and welcome to the board. Not a good idea to sit and watch old drinking buddies drink especially at about 5 months sober. Sooner or later you might pick up "just one". The reason that they don't come around much is that they know that they can't hang out or go do some activity without drinking, which is sad. One of the most important features of the program is the "Fellowship". Making friends new friends, will take the place of the old ones. I've had 100 times more fun since I've been sober and have real friends that are always ready to go have fun, whether it's scuba diving, dirt bike riding, traveling, going to shows... There's nothing like and I can even remember what we did the next day.
Are you attending AA meetings, do you have a sponsor, a God and are you working the steps , and helping other alcoholics ? All of these things will help get ya thru those tuff times.
There certainly is alot more to real, true, lasting, emotional sobriety than just putting the drink down.
Major, Did you stop through AA? I remember how tough it was to hang with my drinking buddies, because its like the connection was gone. The connection was gone because the alcohol was gone. It was the only common element. There is a big world out there without booze. Congrats on the tremendous effort! Keep it up. Tom
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"You're in the right place. That's the door right there. Turn around."
Old people, places and things are dangerous for me. I have some made some real awesome friends in the program. That is not to say that I didn't have some during my drinking career, but those that can't meet me for a drink free lunch aren't real friends anyway. The most important thing in my life today is not drinking and doing drugs.
I was also a productive drunk. A self-absorbed, self serving, and nonobservant productive drunk. I did not enter the rooms until my first year of graduate school. However, I try now to focus on my similarities not my differences. My messed up way of thinking is similar and its something my "earth friends" would never understand. I like having a place I can go to where people get me.
Besides worst case scenario I am missing out on some drinking and spending my time with sober people who care about me and are teaching me to cope with life on life's terms. On the other hand, I could be missing out on jails, institutions and death (emotional, spiritual, physical) and spending my time with people who are teaching me to save my own life. Its and easy pick for me. If I am not an alcoholic then I wouldn't have the urge/desire to cover my feelings up with alcohol.
Sorry for the long post. Glad you are here :o)
Stephanie
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<3 <3 Stephanie <3 <3 "What most people need to learn in life is how to love people and use things instead of using people and loving things."
18-20 beers daily is quite a progression. You might already know that alcohol doesn't quench thirst; it creates it so your drinking isn't about not being thirsty but more about being altered and here you are over 5 months keeping away from being altered but watching "buds" being that-a-way".
You didn't say you're getting back who you really are thru AA so I won't assume. I will agree with what some of the others have suggested because it was also suggested to me, "get away from all drinking and using friends, places, events and family." That one for me included a wife.
Why is it that you stopped drinking? How important is it for you? If you go back to it what happens? What's the worse that can happen? Has it already happened at least once or twice? Sorry I'm a kinda question person. It's how I was taught by a program sponsor to choose my next consequences.
-- Edited by Jerry F on Sunday 29th of November 2009 02:03:05 AM
Hay thanks for the nice words .The holidays get me because it was always a drunk get together play cards eat usually somebody brings up some crap from the past and it allways is a fight. i Quit because it was everynight days off early i think i got sick of it plus all my friends drank off me for free .This is a long time for me to go sober but i don't want to drink anymore i have three teen daughters who get drunk with thier freinds i dont want them to make it a life style im looking forward to meeting good freinds thank again ill be back
getting sober is difficult. Only about 1 in 20, are able to do it. That's why we attend meetings and build a support group of friends with likewise intentions. Have you been to a meeting yet?
Hay thanks for the nice words . I Quit because it was everynight ,days off early. I think i got sick of it plus all my friends drank off me for free .This is a long time for me to go sober im 45 started at18 , but i don't want to drink anymore i have three teen daughters who get drunk with thier freinds i dont want them to make it a life style like i did all the money and jail money for drunk driving im looking forward to meeting good freinds thanks again ill be back
When I quit drinking I had to replace the void with something. For me, it's AA meetings and new hobbies that don't involve drinking. I tried switching chemical addictions and always ended up drinking with the new addiction to complicate the problem.
Let's face it. We did have some pretty grand times while getting loaded. In fact, there weren't many times that I didn't have fun with drinking. But there came a time when I crossed the line of sheer over-indulgence to dependency. Then I had a look at my record and discovered that everything that was lasting, meaningful and noteworthy of my existence came during periods of sobriety. Conversely, most of my ineptitudes were a result of some kind of substance abuse. My freshman year of college I was a 4.0 student(sober). By the end of my sophomore year (drunk) I was on academic probation and peddling weed. Hmm....maybe there's a correlation? This pattern continued for ten years and I finally said enough is enough. To be frank. I compare my love affair with booze to a bad relationship I got out of two years ago. Man it was great in the beginning. Great sex, fun times, fell in love. Then I couldn't live without her. I became worried about loosing her and I did. It was really rough getting over her. But I started letting her go little by little everyday. There had been some aftershocks but eventually I didn't even think about her at all. Same with booze or anything else we are tethered to. The second you decide not to possess it, it no longer possesses you. I have let go of almost every attachment to the material world. I am not my house, my car, my money, my job, my country, my family or my relationships. Those are all just manifestations of the ego. They are all fleeting and will all come to pass. I am. I am eternal. I am divinity. I am consciousness. I am unconditional love. That's it. And that's all we ever have to be
Let's face it. We did have some pretty grand times while getting loaded. In fact, there weren't many times that I didn't have fun with drinking. But there came a time when I crossed the line of sheer over-indulgence to dependency. Then I had a look at my record and discovered that everything that was lasting, meaningful and noteworthy of my existence came during periods of sobriety. Conversely, most of my ineptitudes were a result of some kind of substance abuse. My freshman year of college I was a 4.0 student(sober). By the end of my sophomore year (drunk) I was on academic probation and peddling weed. Hmm....maybe there's a correlation? This pattern continued for ten years and I finally said enough is enough. To be frank. I compare my love affair with booze to a bad relationship I got out of two years ago. Man it was great in the beginning. Great sex, fun times, fell in love. Then I couldn't live without her. I became worried about loosing her and I did. It was really rough getting over her. But I started letting her go little by little everyday. There had been some aftershocks but eventually I didn't even think about her at all. Same with booze or anything else we are tethered to. The second you decide not to possess it, it no longer possesses you. I have let go of almost every attachment to the material world. I am not my house, my car, my money, my job, my country, my family or my relationships. Those are all just manifestations of the ego. They are all fleeting and will all come to pass. I am. I am eternal. I am divinity. I am consciousness. I am unconditional love. That's it. And that's all we ever have to be
Love it! Thanks for sharing! I needed it.
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<3 <3 Stephanie <3 <3 "What most people need to learn in life is how to love people and use things instead of using people and loving things."
