FINANCIAL AMENDS

tokengirl · Veteran Member

FINANCIAL AMENDS

Aquaman · MIP Old Timer

Welcome to the forums. I'll check your bio after this to figure out who I'm talking to.
FIRST THINGS FIRST - DO NOT DRINK AT THIS PROBLEM!!!
It's just money. Money sucks, and it can make you feel helpless, worthless and hopeless. BTDT. I filed almost ten years ago. It gets better. It's just money. Student loans suck, but they're some of the most flexible creditors you have.

See a lawyer. See a credit counselor. See your state aid office. Check into rental assistance.

Keep coming back and no matter what you're going through, getting drunk will only make it worse. We love you and that's priceless.

Rob

Oh yeah, I dunno about your HP, but my HP cares more about me than my money. Just a guess, I don't know for sure, since my HP's phone# was disconnected for non-payment. biggrin

-- Edited by Aquaman on Tuesday 6th of October 2009 12:21:38 AM

angelov8 · MIP Old Timer

This seems to be an area where HP is most needed. I would also talk closely with my sponsor, about the ammends and your concerns. Your sponsor can't fix everything for you, but they can help you find clarity. I plan to do so, but I am not at that step yet, myself. Financial stuff came up in my fourth. I don't want to jump the gun, because the steps are in order for good reason.

From the outside view here, I would get as much financial advice as you can handle. I myself declared bankruptcy a long time ago. It is not a clean sweep; there is still a price to pay to say the least, but was the best thing to do for me at the time. I also have student loans, still. I would make whatever arrangements possible to avoid having the interest continue to build astronomically. Your higher power will help you, if you seek honest help. I know it's scary, I've lived through out of control financial times, as many alcoholics have. It does get better with work and perserverance. You will be able to see more options available and be able to act on them. For more specific financial help, you could start with asking for shares in meetings on experiences of this nature. I've heard some inspiring and amazing shares, people who have experienced dramatic changes, not like winning the lottery, but often better than that, ultimately.
In fellowship,
Angelov8

Rob84 · MIP Old Timer

Hi and welcome to the forum,

It doesn"t sound like you are in position to repay past debts at this point and I think the credit counsel advise is valid.

Not sure how long you are sober, but your soberity has to be #1 priority today.

Work the 3d step daily, turning over your will and life to God, ask that your fears be removed so you can better do his will. Turn your financial problems over to God, the worry and stress is what keeps us from improving ourselves and our life situations.

Look to get "out of yourself" by helping others where possible no matter how bad you feel your situation is, there are others who are in far worse condition, so keep in mind the things we have to be gratful for.

"The answers will come" and your situaton will improve. It has happend for myself and countless others I have known in the program over the years.

SteveP · MIP Old Timer

Just a quick word to say welcome tokengirl, and thanks for your share on this. I think that what others are suggesting here is, from my own experience, the right way.

I'm blown away by the power of this programme and those who work it, dumbfounded at the things people have overcome in this Fellowship. There was a guy sharing at a recent meeting that at one point, before he got into the Fellowship, he was literally sleeping in a sleeping bag on a construction site. He now runs his own business and owns a house.

That just reinforces to me that if we really work this programme, miracles happen.

I know that if we get to meetings and work the programme everything will be OK.

And yeah, money is just money. As the saying goes, money can't buy sobriety, but it can buy a drink. ;)

Mike B. · MIP Old Timer

Tokengirl,
When I'm confronted with problems I simplify my life by do the following:
Don't drink, go to meetings, ask for help and let god sort of the details. It works by working your program, turning your will over and god will sort things out. He never gives us more than we can handle when we can handle it............ My sponsor also reminds me that if we don't drink we can't screw things up....

BLUESMAN · Senior Member

Hello Token girl and welcome to MIP

For me it took years to clean up some of the wreckage of my past and i had alot ..
I did the best i could and i did not drink ....

Somtimes wen we first sober up we want to repair the wreckage of are past overnight ,,,, (it does not work that way )

What work for me was to (focus on my sobriety first )then things started to work out not like i thought they should but they did .
You are doing the best you can ...and your family should be taken care of first .
For me it was sugested to get a Sponcer and worked the 12 steps ....were i found out what my Problem was

Sounds like you are doing the best you can ,,,try and not beat your self up .

Russell

tokengirl · Veteran Member

Thanks so much for your relpy. I feel that way and just wanting to clean this mess up as much as possible. I haven't any feeling of a drink and I do go to my mtgs. I will have 2yrs sober October 22, 2007.

And I just never thought of how I was neglecting my student loan all these years. And how that has affected my present day money matters. I need a lawyer and legal aid counseling for sure!

Thanks.

MDC · Senior Member

So Very happy you haven't "drank" your way through this. Money is just paper...very important paper. check out financial peace or "google" dave ramsey. Alot of great advise. Ammends is not without pain. Make goals and stick to them.

I deal with multi-million dollar accounts at work, but, have struggled with cable bills.

Prioritize your bills. You have a "healthy relationship?" If not married, you bills aren't his, but can he/she not help? ALWAYS keep the priortis straight. Do some reshearch. depending on your amount of debt, and income, you can't bankrupt on student loans, bankruptcy may, or may not be the answer.

My advise is #1 don't drink ( if you're drunk, nothing else matters.) #2 take care of your family, and #3 clean up tihs issue.

jpmger · Member

Everyone is different, but there is a really good 12 Step Program for Debt Problems (and also 'compulsive underearning' which is believed to be a kind of financial anorexia).

The 12 Step program for debt problems is Debtors Anonymous (they have lots of groups for all kinds of debt addiction including addictive under-earning (addiction to poverty, which may be an emotional addiction).

And there is also Underearners Anonymous (no focus on debt as an addiction, but 12 Step recovery for people addicted to poverty.

These groups have really helped me. (I'm not saying it's for everyone, but it has been good for me).

Best!

-- Edited by jpmger on Tuesday 29th of December 2009 10:58:45 PM

tokengirl · Veteran Member

Well Thanks for the other anonymous places to turn to for my financial amends. I truly place my trust in this program and my H.P. today. I believe filing bankrupty my help me start. I will still have the student loan but will talk with them to see if i can receive a relief from the interest incurred.

Thank you all for all the suggestions. Love you guys and this great program called A.A.

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