been kinda of a rough day.walkin home from work last night past a bar i used to frequent was pretty tempting,lots of things going on in my life right now.......My mom is really sick, been in the hospital.atibiotics aren't workin.they're going to test for cancer..........I haven't seen her in a few years and she lives 500 miles away.....money is tight.........

for a long time she wouldn't talk to me.everyone in my family just expects me to fall......

But as time went on she's come around, maybe the fact that she is sick has made her reach out.today she says she's proud of me...I'm grateful for that.

My ex has my youngest daughter , i just recently moved across the street from her school, now my ex is getting antsy and says he's going to take me to court to stop me from seeing her,......he doesn't WANT me to recover...sucks to be him.....

I don't know if it's the time frame or stress but using thoughts have been in my mind a bit lately.i really do try to see myself in my minds eye as happy, peaceful, serene and in recovery,i think if i think about relapsing its bound to happen.........

Anyway if you wouldn't mind adding my mom to your prayers i'd be most grateful...........

thanks for listening