That is such a simple statement, but one that took me years and years to be finally able to say and accept. I am an alcoholic and I will be until the day I die.
There are times when I look back at my drinking and find it hard to believe that that was really me. My life is just infinitely better from how it was when I was drinking. A bad day now is never as bad as a good one was when I was still drinking.
There are also times when the hurt and pain that I have caused come crashing back down on me. But, I know that I am lucky. I know that I am truly blessed because I have been given a second chance at my life. That is such a precious gift for me.
Recently, I was thinking about getting back into AA service as I have been lacking in that area for a few months now. An AA friend called me and asked if I would cover her 'phone shifts for her on the local AA helpline for a few weeks while she is away on holiday. I am so looking forward to doing that again, as I had to stop due to ill health a while back. I remember calling that same help-line back in March 2004.
I am heading off to a meeting this evening and there I will see my wonderful, sober friends and we will share and speak openly about things that are causing problems for us. I now have a program that I can live my life by and I need that. I think that my personal setting is set to 'self-destruct' and I need my program to keep me away from that.
My studies are going well and I am happy with my grades. At the end of this month I have a few weeks off and I'm looking forward to that. I am warm and I have food in the cupboards. I have the love of my family and friends. I have my self-respect back and I can take a close look at myself and be happy with who and what I am today.
I am so grateful to AA, my sponsor, my wonderful AA friends and to everyone here on MIP. Thank you guys!
Have a Happy and Sober New Year everyone.
(((Hugs)))
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
Thank you for the lovely post, Carol!! Kudos on getting back into the phone shift!
I too have so much to be grateful for. And when I forget to be grateful, all I have to do is come here and learn from you all, as well as those in meetings, how gratitude is done.
Happy New Year to you too!!
Joni
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~Your Higher Power has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.
Thanks for sharing with us carol! I think its wonderful that you will be giving back so freely what you have gotten yourself!!! Yea!!!!! Thanks for always being there!!!!
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
