Well, tomorrow is two full months! I'm feeling pretty good. Before everyone would always say, "what are your triggers that make you want to pick up a drink?" I honestly wanted to punch them in the face. I mean, come on, my trigger was waking up in the morning! I never had specific reasons to drink, I didn't need a trigger to drink. I'm an alcoholic and drank all of the time. I could never explain that to counselors and stuff.
Now though, I do not get the urge to drink alone, or just because I am bored. Those are slowly passing. I've recently started dating a friend from high school. And I mean real dating....the right way, the way it should be. We've been to movies and dinner a few times. It's nice. It feels normal, less risky than my other relationships. I've heard a lot of peope say that I should not make any major changes in my life during the first year of sobriety. I am going to stick with that when it somes to relationships also (well at least as best as I can ).
I know that I am really happy to be here, and happy to still have my life. It's so hard to realize that right now I have to put my alcoholism above everything else. It's such a struggle. I can't believe that it can pull at me so much. Sometimes, when I spend time with the guy (you know, the one I mentioned above...LoL), I think of having a drink, getting that warm fuzzy feeling after just a few. Then, I have to slap myslef in the face and realize, "what am I thinking? I can't drink a few, I'm a flippin alcoholic." I CANT HAVE JUST ONE DRINK.
When I first became sober, I was finding it very hard to find fun in anything I did. Now, it has really came back. Not all the way, but it's really there again. Crazy how things change! So anyway, thanks again for comments and support! I'll keep yall updated....and I love hearing about your progress too!
Glad you're doing well, but please keep in mind those suggestions are there for a reason! We each think we will be / are the exception, only to find out that those who came before us knew what the hell they were talking about..........
One day at a time..........(((((Hugs)))
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.
Yea Cristal! It only gets better and better!!!! And the fun we have today will be remembered!!!! Congrats on 2 months!
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
Congratulations !! I remember being a couple months sober .... the pink cloud. I felt great, nothing could stop me. Well, something did stop me ... Me !! I failed to listen to the others in the meetings, and my sponsor and work the program. I was drunk before I could get 4 months without a drink. Please be careful Crystal . It is my hope for you that you are in fact working the program and steps with a sponsor. True, emotional , lasting sobriety came for me by taking those all important 12 steps. And finding my own Higher Power that I choose to call God and learing how to rely on Him to keep me sober.
congrats on two months Crystal. Stay close to the program, and make lots of friends to hang out with. Fellowship is the most overlooked aspect of the program. I certainly didn't "get it" for 2 whole years.
Yep, I have a sponsor. I completely understand how quick and easy it is to fail. I made it a little over 90 days last time, and was so proud of myslef, so proud I thouht I could go out and be like everyone else. Just have one drink. I still get that feeling once in awhile but I think that failing in the past, has helped me understand how hard this is going to be. I was overly confident before. Now I only have confidence in two things. My work and the fact that I'm not going to drink today. Hopefully I'll add some more to that in the future! Thanks for all the comments and concerns. They really help me.
Oh, one other thing about the fellowship part of AA.......I'm definitly lacking in that area. I still have a real hard time talking to people. And I'm pretty sure I'm not embracing the 12 steps 100%. I hope that comes with time and commitment. But, I am honestly doing my best and I feel a little more involved each day
). 